Plays and Poems

The rest were ragged, old, and beggarly;
Yet, as they are, here are they come to meet you.
Pet. Go, rascals, go, and fetch my supper in.
Exeunt Servants.
Where is the life that late I led?

Pet. 'Tis burnt; and so is all the meat.
What dogs are these! Where is the rascal cook?
How durst you, villains, bring it from the dresser,
And serve it thus to me that love it not?
There, take it to you, trenchers, cups, and all. 168
Throws the meat, etc. at them.
You heedless joltheads and unmanner'd slaves!
What! do you grumble? I'll be with you straight.
Kath. I pray you, husband, be not so disquiet:
The meat was well if you were so contented.
Pet. I tell thee, Kate, 'twas burnt and dried
away,

And I expressly am forbid to touch it,
For it engenders choler, planteth anger;
And better 'twere that both of us did fast,
Since, of ourselves, ourselves are choleric,
Than feed it with such over-roasted flesh.

180

Be patient; to-morrow 't shall be mended,
And for this night we 'll fast for company.
Come, I will bring thee to thy bridal chamber.
Exeunt PETRUCHIO, KATHARINA,
and CURTIS.

Nath. Peter, didst ever see the like?
Peter. He kills her in her own humour.
Re-enter CURTIS.

Gru. Where is he?

Curt. In her chamber, making a sermon of continency to her;

And rails, and swears, and rates, that she, poor soul,

Where are those? Sit down, Kate, and wel- Knows not which way to stand, to look, to speak,

189

And sits as one new-risen from a dream.
Away, away! for he is coming hither. Exeunt.

Re-enter PETRUCHIO.

And 'tis my hope to end successfully.
Pet. Thus have I politicly begun my reign,
And till she stoop she must not be full-gorg'd,
My falcon now is sharp and passing empty,
For then she never looks upon her lure.
Another way I have to man my haggard,
To make her come and know her keeper's call;
That is, to watch her, as we watch these kites
That bate and beat and will not be obedient.
She eat no meat to-day, nor none shall eat; 20
Last night she slept not, nor to-night she shall

not:

As with the meat, some undeserved fault
I'll find about the making of the bed;
And here I'll fling the pillow, there the bolster,
This way the coverlet, another way the sheets:
Ay, and amid this hurly I intend

That all is done in reverent care of her;
And in conclusion she shall watch all night:
And if she chance to nod I'll rail and brawl,
And with the clamour keep her still awake. 20
This is a way to kill a wife with kindness;
And thus I'll curb her mad and headstrong
humour.

He that knows better how to tame a shrew,
Now let him speak: 'tis charity to show. Exit.

SCENE II.-Padua. Before BAPTISTA'S House.

Enter TRANIO and HORTENSIO.

Tra. Is 't possible, friend Licio, that Mistress
Bianca

Doth fancy any other but Lucentio ?
I tell you, sir, she bears me fair in hand.

Hor. Sir, to satisfy you in what I have said,
Stand by, and mark the manner of his teaching.
They stand aside.

Enter BIANCA and LUCENTIO.

Luc. Now, mistress, profit you in what you read? Bian. What, master, read you? first resolve me that.

Luc. I read that I profess, the Art to Love.
Bian. And may you prove, sir, master of your
art!

Luc. While you, sweet dear, prove mistress of
my heart.
They retire. 10
Hor. Quick proceeders, marry! Now tell me,
I pray,

You that durst swear that your mistress Bianca
Lov'd none in the world so well as Lucentio.

Tra. O despiteful love! unconstant womankind!
I tell thee, Licio, this is wonderful.

Hor. Mistake no more: I am not Licio,
Nor a musician, as I seem to be,
But one that scorns to live in this disguise,
For such a one as leaves a gentleman,
And makes a god of such a cullion:
Know, sir, that I am call'd Hortensio.

Tra. Signior Hortensio, I have often heard
Of your entire affection to Bianca ;
And since mine eyes are witness of her lightness,
I will with you, if you be so contented,
Forswear Bianca and her love for ever.

Hor. See, how they kiss and court! Signior
Lucentio,

Here is my hand, and here I firmly vow
Never to woo her more; but do forswear her,
As one unworthy all the former favours
That I have fondly flatter'd her withal.

Tra. And here I take the like unfeigned oath,
Never to marry with her though she would entreat.
Fie on her! see how beastly she doth court him.
Hor. Would all the world but he had quite
forsworn!

For me, that I may surely keep mine oath,
I will be married to a wealthy widow
Ere three days pass, which hath as long lov'd me
As I have lov'd this proud disdainful haggard.
And so farewell, Signior Lucentio.

Kindness in women, not their beauteous looks,
Shall win my love and so I take my leave,
In resolution as I swore before.

Exit.
Tra. Mistress Bianca, bless you with such grace
As 'longeth to a lover's blessed case!
Nay, I have ta'en you napping, gentle love,
And have forsworn you with Hortensio.
Bian. Tranio, you jest. But have you both
forsworn me?

Tra. Mistress, we have.
Lue.

Tra. If he be credulous and trust my tale,
I'll make him glad to seem Vincentio,
And give assurance to Baptista Minola,
As if he were the right Vincentio.
Take in your love, and then let me alone.
Exeunt LUCENTIO and BIANCA.
Enter a Pedant.

Ped. God save you, sir!
Tra.
And you, sir! you are welcome.
Travel you far on, or are you at the furthest?
Ped. Sir, at the furthest for a week or two;
But then up further, and as far as Rome;
And so to Tripoli, if God lend me life.
Tra. What countryman, I pray?
Ped.

Of Mantua.

Tra. 'Tis death for any one in Mantua
To come to Padua. Know you not the cause?
Your ships are stay'd at Venice; and the duke,
For private quarrel 'twixt your duke and him,
Hath publish'd and proclaim'd it openly.
'Tis marvel, but that you are but newly come,
You might have heard it else proclaim'd about.

Ped. Alas! sir, it is worse for me than so;
For I have bills for money by exchange
From Florence, and must here deliver them. 90
Tra. Well, sir, to do you courtesy,
This will I do, and this I will advise you.
First, tell me, have you ever been at Pisa?

Ped. Ay, sir, in Pisa have I often been;
Pisa renowned for grave citizens.

Tra. Among them know you one Vincentio ?
Ped. I know him not, but I have heard of him;
A merchant of incomparable wealth.

Tra. He is my father, sir; and, sooth to say,
In countenance somewhat doth resemble you. 100
Bion. Aside. As much as an apple doth an
oyster, and all one.

Tra. To save your life in this extremity,
This favour will I do you for his sake;
And think it not the worst of all your fortunes
That you are like to Sir Vincentio.
His name and credit shall you undertake,
And in my house you shall be friendly lodg'd.
Look that you take upon you as you should!
You understand me, sir; so shall you stay
Till you have done your business in the city. 110
He says so, Tranio. If this be courtesy, sir, accept of it.

Then we are rid of Licio.
Tra. I' faith, he'll have a lusty widow now, 50
That shall be woo'd and wedded in a day.
Bian. God give him joy!
Tra. Ay, and he'll tame her.
Bian.

Ped. O sir, I do; and will repute you ever The patron of my life and liberty.

Tra. Then go with me to make the matter good. This, by the way, I let you understand: My father is here look'd for every day, To pass assurance of a dower in marriage "Twixt me and one Baptista's daughter here: In all these circumstances I'll instruct you. Go with me to clothe you as becomes you. Exeunt.

SCENE III.-A Room in PETRUCHIO's House. Enter KATHARINA and GRUMIO.

Gru. No, no, forsooth; I dare not for my life. Kath. The more my wrong, the more his spite

appears.

What did he marry me to famish me?

Beggars, that come unto my father's door,
Upon entreaty have a present alms;

If not, elsewhere they meet with charity:
But I, who never knew how to entreat,
Nor never needed that I should entreat,
Am starv'd for meat, giddy for lack of sleep;
With oaths kept waking, and with brawling fed.
And that which spites me more than all these
wants,

He does it under name of perfect love;

As who should say, if I should sleep or eat
"Twere deadly sickness, or else present death.
I prithee go and get me some repast;

I care not what, so it be wholesome food.
Gru. What say you to a neat's foot?

What news with you, sir?
Hab. Here is the cap your worship did bespeak.
Pet. Why, this was moulded on a porringer;
A velvet dish: fie, fie! 'tis lewd and filthy:
Why, 'tis a cockle or a walnut-shell,
A knack, a toy, a trick, a baby's cap:

Kath. 'Tis passing good: I prithee let me have Away with it! come, let me have a bigger

Gru. Nay then, I will not: you shall have the mustard,

Or else you get no beef of Grumio.

Kath. Then both, or one, or any thing thou wilt. Gru. Why then, the mustard without the beef. Kath. Go, get thee gone, thou false deluding slave, Beats him. 31 That feed'st me with the very name of meat. Sorrow on thee and all the pack of you, That triumph thus upon my misery! Go, get thee gone, I say.

Enter PETRUCHIO, with a dish of meat, and

HORTENSIO.

Kath. I'll have no bigger: this doth fit the time, And gentlewomen wear such caps as these. Pet. When you are gentle, you shall have one too; And not till then.

Hor. Aside. That will not be in haste. Kath. Why, sir, I trust I may have leave to speak, And speak I will; I am no child, no babe: Your betters have endur'd me say my mind, And if you cannot, best you stop your ears. My tongue will tell the anger of my heart, Or else my heart, concealing it, will break: And rather than it shall, I will be free Even to the uttermost, as I please, in words. Pet. Why, thou say'st true; it is a paltry cap, A custard-coffin, a bauble, a silken pie.

I love thee well in that thou lik'st it not.
Kath. Love me or love me not, I like the cap,
And it I will have, or I will have none.
Exit Haberdasher.

Pet. Thy gown? why, ay: come, tailor, let us see 't.

O, mercy, God! what masquing stuff is here? What's this? a sleeve? 'tis like a demi-cannon:

Pet. How fares my Kate? What, sweeting, What! up and down, carv'd like an apple-tart? all amort?

Hor. Mistress, what cheer?
Kath.
Faith, as cold as can be.
Pet. Pluck up thy spirits; look cheerfully upon

me.

Here, love; thou seest how diligent I am
To dress thy meat myself and bring it thee: 40
I am sure, sweet Kate, this kindness merits
thanks.

Here's snip and nip and cut and slish and slash,
Like to a censer in a barber's shop.
Why, what, i' devil's name, tailor, call'st thou this?
Hor. Aside. I see, she's like to have neither

cap nor gown.

Tai. You bid me make it orderly and well,
According to the fashion and the time.
Pet. Marry, and did: but if you be remember'd,
I did not bid you mar it to the time.

What! not a word? Nay, then thou lov'st it not, Go, hop me over every kennel home,

And all my pains is sorted to no proof.

Here, take away this dish.

For you shall hop without my custom, sir. I'll none of it: hence! make your best of it.

100

Kath. I never saw a better-fashion'd gown, More quaint, more pleasing, nor more commendable.

Belike you mean to make a puppet of me.

Pet. Why, true; he means to make a puppet of thee.

Tai. She says your worship means to make a puppet of her.

Pet. O monstrous arrogance! Thou liest, thou thread,

Thou thimble,

Thou yard, three-quarters, half-yard, quarter, nail!

Thou flea, thou nit, thou winter-cricket thou! 110 Brav'd in mine own house with a skein of thread? Away! thou rag, thou quantity, thou remnant, Or I shall so be-mete thee with thy yard

As thou shalt think on prating whilst thou liv'st!
I tell thee, I, that thou hast marr'd her gown.
Tai. Your worship is deceiv'd: the gown is
made

Just as my master had direction.
Grumio gave order how it should be done.
Gru. I gave him no order; I gave him the stuff.
Tai. But how did you desire it should be made?
Gru. Marry, sir, with needle and thread. 121
Tai. But did you not request to have it cut?
Gru. Thou hast faced many things.
Tai. I have.

Gru. Face not me: thou hast braved many men; brave not me: I will neither be faced nor braved. I say unto thee, I bid thy master cut out the gown; but I did not bid him cut it to pieces: ergo, thou liest.

Tai. Why, here is the note of the fashion to testify.

Pet. Read it.

131

Gru. Error i' the bill, sir; error i' the bill. commanded the sleeves should be cut out and

sewed up again; and that I'll prove upon thee, though thy little finger be armed in a thimble. Tai. This is true that I say: an I had thee in place where thou should'st know it.

150

Gru. I am for thee straight: take thou the bill, give me thy mete-yard, and spare not me.

Hor. God-a-mercy, Grumio! then he shall have no odds.

Pet. Well, sir, in brief, the gown is not for me. Gru. You are i' the right, sir: 'tis for my mistress.

Pet. Go, take it up unto thy master's use. Gru. Villain, not for thy life! Take up my mistress' gown for thy master's use!

Pet. Aside. Hortensio, say thou wilt see the tailor paid.

Go take it hence; be gone, and say no more. Hor. Tailor, I'll pay thee for thy gown to

morrow:

Take no unkindness of his hasty words. Away! I say; commend me to thy master.

Exit Tailor.

Pet. Well, come, my Kate; we will unto your father's,

170

Even in these honest mean habiliments.
Our purses shall be proud, our garments poor :
For 'tis the mind that makes the body rich;
And as the sun breaks through the darkest clouds,
So honour peereth in the meanest habit.
What is the jay more precious than the lark
Because his feathers are more beautiful?
Or is the adder better than the eel
Because his painted skin contents the eye?
O, no, good Kate; neither art thou the worse
For this poor furniture and mean array.
If thou account'st it shame, lay it on me;
And therefore frolic: we will hence forthwith,
To feast and sport us at thy father's house.
Go, call my men, and let us straight to him ;
And bring our horses unto Long-lane end;
There will we mount, and thither walk on foot.
Let's see; I think 'tis now some seven o'clock,
And well we may come there by dinner-time.

180

191

Kath. I dare assure you, sir, 'tis almost two; And 'twill be supper-time ere you come there. Pet. It shall be seven ere I go to horse. Look, what I speak, or do, or think to do, You are still crossing it. Sirs, let 't alone : I will not go to-day; and ere I do, It shall be what o'clock I say it is.

Hor. Why, so this gallant will command the Exeunt.

sun.

SCENE IV.-Padua. Before BAPTISTA'S House. Enter TRANIO, and the Pedant dressed like VINCENTIO.

Tra. Sir, this is the house: please it you that I call?

Ped. Ay, what else? and but I be deceived Signior Baptista may remember me, Near twenty years ago, in Genoa, Where we were lodgers at the Pegasus.

Tra. 'Tis well; and hold your own, in any case, With such austerity as 'longeth to a father. Enter BIONDELLO.

Ped. I warrant you. But, sir, here comes your boy;

'Twere good he were school'd.

Tra. Fear you not him. Sirrah Biondello, 10 Now do your duty throughly, I advise you : Imagine 'twere the right Vincentio.

Bion. Tut! fear not me.

Tra. But hast thou done thy errand to Baptista? Bion. I told him that your father was at Venice, And that you look'd for him this day in Padua. Tra. Thou 'rt a tall fellow: hold thee that to drink.

Pet. Why, sir, what 's your conceit in that?
Gru. O, sir, the conceit is deeper than you Here comes Baptista. Set your countenance, sir.

think for:

161

Take up my mistress' gown to his master's use! O, fie, fie, fie!

Enter BAPTISTA and LUCENTIO.

Signior Baptista, you are happily met.

To the Pedant. Sir, this is the gentleman I told
you of.

I pray you, stand good father to me now,
Give me Bianca for my patrimony.

Ped. Soft, son!

Sir, by your leave: having come to Padua
To gather in some debts, my son Lucentio
Made me acquainted with a weighty cause
Of love between your daughter and himself:
And, for the good report I hear of you,
And for the love he beareth to your daughter,
And she to him, to stay him not too long,
I am content, in a good father's care,

Bion. The old priest at Saint Luke's church is at your command at all hours.

Luc. And what of all this?

Bion. I cannot tell, except they are busied about a counterfeit assurance: take you assurance of her, cum privilegio ad imprimendum solum. To the church! take the priest, clerk, and some sufficient honest witnesses.

If this be not that you look for, I have no more to say,

To have him match'd; and if you please to like But bid Bianca farewell for ever and a day.

No worse than I, upon some agreement

Me shall you find ready and willing

With one consent to have her so bestow'd;
For curious I cannot be with you,
Signior Baptista, of whom I hear so well.

Bap. Sir, pardon me in what I have to say:
Your plainness and your shortness please me well.
Right true it is, your son Lucentio here
Doth love my daughter and she loveth him,
Or both dissemble deeply their affections :
And therefore, if you say no more than this,
That like a father you will deal with him
And pass my daughter a sufficient dower,
The match is made, and all is done:
Your son shall have my daughter with consent.
Tra. I thank you, sir. Where then do you
know best

We be affied and such assurance ta'en

As shall with either part's agreement stand? 50
Bap. Not in my house, Lucentio; for, you
know,

Pitchers have ears, and I have many servants.
Besides, old Gremio is hearkening still,
And happily we might be interrupted.

Tra. Then at my lodging an it like you:
There doth my father lie, and there this night
We'll pass the business privately and well.
Send for your daughter by your servant here;
My boy shall fetch the scrivener presently.
The worst is this, that at so slender warning, 60
You're like to have a thin and slender pittance.
Bap. It likes me well: Cambio, hie you home,
And bid Bianca make her ready straight;
And, if you will, tell what hath happened:
Lucentio's father is arriv'd in Padua,
And how she 's like to be Lucentio's wife.
Bion. I pray the gods she may, with all my

heart!

Tra. Dally not with the gods, but get thee gone. Signior Baptista, shall I lead the way ? Welcome! one mess is like to be your cheer. 70 Come, sir; we will better it in Pisa.

Bap. I follow you.

Exeunt TRANIO, Pedant, and BAPTISTA. Bion. Cambio!

Luc. What sayest thou, Biondello?

Bion. I cannot tarry: I knew a wench married in an afternoon as she went to the garden for parsley to stuff a rabbit; and so may you, sir; and so adieu, sir. My master hath appointed me to go to Saint Luke's, to bid the priest be ready to come against you come with your appendix. Exit.

Luc. I may, and will, if she be so contented: She will be pleas'd; then wherefore should I doubt?

Hap what hap may, I'll roundly go about her:
It shall go hard if Cambio go without her. Exit.

SCENE V.-A public Road

Enter PETRUCHIO, KATHARINA, HORTENSIO and Servants.

Pet. Come on, i' God's name; once more toward our father's.

Good Lord, how bright and goodly shines the moon!

Kath. The moon! the sun: it is not moon-
light now.

Pet. I say it is the moon that shines so bright.
Kath. I know it is the sun that shines so bright.
Pet. Now, by my mother's son, and that's
myself,

It shall be moon, or star, or what I list,
Or ere I journey to your father's house.
Go one, and fetch our horses back again.
Evermore cross'd and cross'd; nothing but
cross'd!

Hor. Say as he says, or we shall never go.
Kath. Forward, I pray, since we have come
so far,

And be it moon, or sun, or what you please.
An if you please to call it a rush-candle,
Henceforth I vow it shall be so for me.
Pet. say it is the moon.
Kath.
I know it is the moon.
Pet. Nay, then you lie; it is the blessed sun.
Kath. Then God be bless'd,it is the blessed sun:
But sun it is not when you say it is not,
And the moon changes even as your mind.
What you will have it nam'd, even that it is;

Bion. You saw my master wink and laugh upon And so it shall be so for Katharine.
you?

Hor. Petruchio, go thy ways; the field is won. Pet. Well, forward, forward! thus the bowl should run,

And not unluckily against the bias.

But soft! what company is coming here?

Enter VINCENTIO.

To VINCENTIO. Good morrow, gentle mistress. where away?

« Previous Continue »

Books