« PreviousContinue »
Ford. (Aside. ] I think, I shall drink in pipe- Fal. Mistress Ford, I cannot cog, I cannot prate, wine ' first with him; I'll make him dance. mistress Ford. Now shall I sin in my wish:. I Will you go, gentles?
would thy husband were dead; l'll speak it before Ali. Have with you, to see this monster. [Ereunt. the best lord, I would make thee my lady.
5 Mrs. Ford. I your lady, sir John! alas, I SCENE III.
should be a pitiful lady. Ford's House.
Fal. Let the court of France shew me such Enter Mrs. Ford, Mrs. Page, and serrants with another: I see how thine eve would emulate the a basket.
diamond: Thou hast the right arched bent of the Airs. Ford. What, John! What, Robert ! 10 brow, that becomes the ship-tire, the tire-valiant,
MIrs. Page. Quickly, quickly; is the buck- or any tire of Venetian admittance4. basket
Mrs. Ford. A plain kerchief, sir John: my brows Alrs. Ford, I warrant:-.-What, Robin, I say. become notbing else ; nor that well neither. Mrs. Page. Come, come, come.
Fal. Thou art a traitor' to say so; thou would'st Mrs. Ford. Here, sit down.
15 make an absolute courtier; and the firm fixture of Mrs. Page. Give your men the charge; we thy foot would give an excellent motion to thy must be brief.
gait, in a semi-circled farthingale. I see what Alrs. Ford. Marry, as I told you before, John, thou wert, if fortune thy foe were not; nature is and Robert, be ready here hard by in the brew- thy friend: Come, thou can’st not hide it. house; and when I suddenly call on you, come 20 Mrs. Ford. Believe me, there's no such thing forth, and (without any pause, or staggering) take this basket on your shoulders: that done, trudge Fal. What made me love thee? let that perwith it in all haste, and carry it among the whit- suade thee, there's something extraordinary in sters in Datchet inead, and there empty it in the thee. Come, I cannot cog, and say, thou art this muddy ditch, close by the Thames side, 25 and that, like a many of these lisping haw-thorn Mrs. Page. You will do it?
buds, that come like women in inen's apparel, Mrs. Ford. I have told them over and over; and smell like Buckler's-bury in simple-time; I they lack no direction: Be gone, and come cannot: but I love thee; Done but thee; and when you are call'd.
[Errunt Servants. Ithou deservest it. Mrs. Page. Here comes little Robin. 30
Mrs. Ford. Do not betray me, sir; I fear
you Enter Robin.
love mistress Page: Mrs. Ford. How now, my eyas-musket? what Fal. Thou might'st as well say I love to walk news with you?
by the Counter-gate; which is as hateful to me Rob. My master sir Johnis come in at your back- as the reek of a lime-kiln. door, mistress Ford; and requests your company. 35 Mirs. Ford. Well, heaven knows how I love
Nrs. Page. You little Jack-a-lent', have you you; and you shall one day find it. been true to us?
Fal. Keep in that mind; I'll deserve it. Rob. Ay, I'll be sworn: My master knows not Mrs. Ford. Nay, I must tell you, so you do; of your being here; and hath threaten’d to put or else I could not be in that mind. me into everlasting liberty, if I tell you of it; 40 Rob. [!!ithin.] Mistress Ford, mistress Ford! for, he swears, he'll turn me away.
here's mistress Page at the door, sweating, and Mfrs. Puge. Thou’rt a good boy; this secrecy blowing, and looking wildly, and would needs of thine shall be a tailor to thee, and shall make speak with you presently. thee a new doublet and hose.--I'll go hide me. Fal. She shall not see me; I will ensconce me
Mrs. Ford. Doso:Gotellthy master, I am alone. 45 behind the arras. Mistress Page,rememberyou your cue. [Exit Rob. Mrs. Ford. Pray you do so; she's a very tatMrs. Page. I warrant thee; if I do not act it, tling woman.
[Falstafi" hides himself. hiss me, [Exit Mrs. Page.
Enter Mrs. Puge. Mrs. Ford. Go to, then;-we'll use this un- What's the matter? how now? wholesomne humidity, this gross watry pumpion ; 30 Mrs. Page. O mistress Ford, what have -we'll teach you to know turtles from jays. done? you're sham'd, you are overthrown, you Enter Fulstaff.
are undone for ever. Ful. Have I caught thee, my hearenly jewel? Mrs. Ford. What's the matter, good mistress Why, now let me die, for have liv'd long Page? enough; this is the period of my ambition : 0) 35 Mrs. Puge. () well-a-day, mistress Ford ! havthis blessed hour!
ling an honest man to your husband, to give liim Mrs, Ford. O sweet sir John!
such cause of suspicion ! Pipe is known to be a vessel of wine, now containing two hogsheads. Pipe wine is therefore wine, not from the bottle, but the pipe; and the jest consists in the ambiguity of the word, which signifies both a cask of wine, and a musical instrument. ¿ Eras-musket is the same as infant Lilliputian. 'A Juch o' lent was a puppet thrown at in Lent, like shrove-cocks. * The speaker here tells his mistress, she had a face that would become all the head-dresses in fashion. 5 That is, to thy own inerit. Buchler's-bury, in the time of Shakspeare, was chietly inhabited by druggists, who sold all kinds of berbs, green as well as dry.
Mrs. Ford. What cause of suspicion ?
Ford. Buck? I would I could wash myself of Mrs. Page. What cause of suspicion ?-Out the buck! Buck, buck, buck? Ay, buck; I warupon you !-how am I mistook in you!
rant you, buck; and of the season, too, it shall Afrs. Ford. Why, alas ! what's the matter? appear. [Exeunt Servants with the basket.]
Mrs. Puge. Your husband's coming hither, wo- 5 Gentlemen, I have dream'd to-night ; I'll tell you man, with all the officers in Windsor, to search my dream. Here, here, here be my keys: ascend for a gentleman, that, he says, is here now in the my chambers, search, seek, find out: I'll warrant house, by your consent, to take an ill advantage we'll unkennel the fox :-Let me stop this way of his absence: You are undone.
first :-So, now, uncape?. Mrs. Ford. Speak louder.--[Aside.] 'Tis not 10 Page. Good master Ford, be contented: you so, I hope.
wrong yourself tov much. Mrs. Page. Pray heaven it be not so, that you Ford. True, master Page.-Up, gentlemen; have such a man here; but 'tis most certain your you shall see sport anon: follow me, gentlemen. husband's coming with half Windsor at his heels,
[Erit. to search for such a one. I come before to tell 15 Eva. This is fery fantastical humours, and you: If you know yourself clear, why I am glad jealousies. of it: but if you have a friend here, convey him, Caius. By gar, 'tis no de fashion of France: convey him out. Be not amaz'd; call all your it is not jealous in France. senses to you; defend your reputation, or bid Page. Nay, follow him, gentlemen; see the farewell to your good life for ever.
20 issue of his search.
[Exeunt. Mrs. Ford. What shall I do?- There is a gen- Mrs. Puge. Is there not a double excellency tleinan, my dear friend; and I fear not mine own in this? shame, so much as his peril: I had rather than a Mrs. Ford. I know not which pleases me betthousand pound, he were out of the house. ter, that my husband is deceiv'd, or sir John.
Mrs. Page. For shame, never stand you had 25 Mrs. Puge. What a taking was he in, when rather, and you had rather; your husband's here your husband ask'd who was in the basket ! at hand, bethink you of some conveyance: in the Mrs. Ford. I am half afraid, he will have need house you cannot hide him.—Oh, how have you of washing ; so throwing him into the water will deceived me!-Look, here is a basket; if he be do him a benefit. of any reasonable stature, he may creep in here ; 30 Mrs. Puge. Hang him, dishonest rascal! I would and throw foul linen upon him, as if it were go- all of the same strain were in the same distress. ing to bucking: Or, it is whiting-time, send him Mrs. Ford. I think, my husband hath some speby your two men to Datchet mead.
cial suspicion of Falstall's being here; for I never Mrs. Ford. He's too big to go in there: What saw him so gross in his jealousy till now. shall I do?
35 Mrs. Page. I will lay a plot to try that: And Re-enter Falstaff
we will yet have more tricks with Falstaft: his Fal. Let me see't, let me see 't! O let me see't! dissolute disease will scarce obey this medicine. P'll in, I'll in ;-follow your friend's counsel ;- Mrs. Ford. Shall we send that foolish carrion, I'll in.
mistress Quickly, to him, and excuse his throws Nirs. Page. What! sir John Falstaff? Are these 40|ing into the water; and give him another hope, your letters, knight?
to betray bim to another punishment? Fal. I love thee,-help me away: let me creep Mrs. Page. We'll do it; let him be sent for in here; I'll never
[linen. to-morrow, eight o'clock, to have amends. [He goes into the basket, theycover him with foul Re-enter Ford, Page, and the rest at a distance,
Mrs. Page. Ilelp to cover your master, boy : 45 Ford. I cannot find him: may be the knare Call your men, mistress Ford : --You dissembling brag'd of that he could not compass. knight!
Nirs. Page. Heard you
that? Alrs. Ford. What, John, Robert, John! Go, take Mrs. Ford. I, I; peace :
You use me up these clothes here, quickly; Where's the cowl- well, master Ford, do you? staff? look, how you drumble': carry them to the 50' Ford. Ay, I do so. laundress in Datchet mead ; quickly, come. Mrs. Ford. Heaven make you better than Enter Ford, Page, Cuius, and Sir Hugh Evans. your thoughts! Ford.. Pray you, come near: If I suspect with
Ford. Amen. out cause, why then make sport at me, then let Mrs. Page. You do yourself mighty wrong, me be your jest, I deserve it.--How now? wbi- 55 inaster Ford. ther bear you this?
Ford. Ay, ay; I must bear it. Sert. To the laundress, forsooth.
Eva. If there be any pody in the house, and in Mrs. Ford. Why, what have you to do whi. thechambers, and in the coffers, and in the presses, ther they bear it? you were best meddle with heaven forgive my sins at the day of judgment ! buck-washing.
160! Caius. By gar, nor I tov; there is no bodies. · Look, how you drumble, means, how confused you are. In the North, drumbled ale, means muddy, disturb'd ale. * This alludes to the stopping every hole at which a fox could enter, before they uncıpe ar turn himout of the bag in which he was brought. Every one has heard of a bug-for.
Page. Page. Fie, fie, master Ford! are you not| Enter Shallow, Slender, and Mrs. Quickly. asham'd? what spirit, what devil suggests this
Shal. Break their talk, mistress Quickly; my imagination? I would not have your distemper in kinsman shall speak for himself. this kind, for the wealth of Windsor Castle. Slen. I'll make a shaft or a bolt on't: 'slid, 'tis
Ford. 'Tis my fault, master Page: I suffer for it. 5 but venturing.
Shal. Be not dismay'd. wife is as honest a'omans, as I will desires among Slen. No, she shall not dismay me: I care not five thousand, and five hundred too.
for that,-but that I am afeard. Caius. By gar, I see 'tis an honest woman. Quic. Hark ye; master Slender would speak a Ford. Well;— I promis'd you a dinner:-—Come, 10 word with you. come, walk in the park: I pray you pardon me; I Anne. I come to him. This is my father'schoice. will hereafter make known to you, why I have done O, what a world of vile ill-favour'd faults this. Come, wife ; come, mistress Page; I pray Look handsome in three hundred pounds a-year! you pardon me; pray heartily, pardon me.
[ Aside. Page. Let's go in, gentlemen; but, trust me, 15 Quic. And how does good master Fenton ? we'll mock him. I do invite you to-morrow pray you, a word with you. morning to my house to breakfast; after, we'll a Shal. She's coming; to her, coz. O boy, thou birding together; I have a fine hawk for the hadst a father! bush : shall it be so:
Slen. I had a father, mistress Anne ;-my unFord. Any thing.
20 cle can tell you good jests of him:- Pray you, Era. If there is one, I shall make two in the uncle, tell mistress Anne the jest, how my father company.
stole two geese out of a pen, good uncle. Caius. If there be one or two, I shall make-a Shal. Mistress Anne, my cousin loves you. de turd.
Slen. Ay, that I do; as well as I love any woEvn. In your teeth :—for shame.
25 inan in Gloucestershire. Ford. Pray you go, master Page.
Shul. He will maintain you like a gentlewoman. Eda. I
pray you now, remembrance to-mor- Slen. Ay, that I will, "come cut and long-tail, row on the lousy knave, mine host.
under the degree of a 'squire. Caius. Dat is good; by gar, vit all my heart. Shal. He will make you a hundred and fifty
Era. A lousy knave; to bave his gibes, and 30 pounds jointure. bis mockeries.
[Exeunt. Anne. Good master Shallow, let him woo for
Shal. Marry, I thank you for it;
for that-good comfort. She calls you, coz: I'll
Anne. What is your will: Fent. Why, thou must be thyself.
Slen. My will ? 'od's heartlings, that's a pretty He doth object, I am too great of birth ; [pence, 40 jest indeed! I ne'er made my will yet, I thank And, that, my state being galld with my ex- heaven; I am not such a sickly creature, I give I seek to heal it only by his wealth :
heaven praise. Besides these, other bars he lays before me, Anne. I mean, master Slender, what would you My riots past, my wild societies ;
with me? And tells me, 'tis a thing impossible
45 Slen. Truly, for mine own part, I would little I should love thee, but as a property.
or nothing with you: Your father and my uncle, Anne. May be, he tells you true. [come!
have made motions : if it be my luck, so; if not, Fent, No, heaven so speed me in iny time to happy man be his dole?! They can tell you how Albeit, I will confess, thy father's wealth things go, better than I can: You may ask your Was the first motive that I woo'd thee, Anne: 50 father; here he comes. Yet, wooing thee, I found three of more value
Enter Page and Mistress Page. Than stamps in gold, or sums in sealed bags; Page. Now, master Slender:—Love him, daughAnd 'tis the very riches of thyself
ter Anne. That now I aim at.
Why how now! what does master Fenton here? Anne. Gentle master Fenton,
55 You wrong me, sir, thus still to haunt my house : You seek my father's love; still seek it, sir : I told you, sir, my daughter is dispos'd of. If opportunity and humblést suit
Fent. Nay,master Page,be notimpatient.(child. Cannot attain it, why then, ----Hark you bither. Mrs.Page.Goodmaster Fenton, comenottomy
[Fenton and Mist :$$ Anne go apart. Page. She is no match for you. · That is, come poor, or rich, to offer himself as my rival. The phrase is derived from the forest laws, according to which, a man who had no right to the privilege of chace, was obliged to cut or lat liis dog, amongst other modes of disabling him, hy depriving him of his tail. A dog so cut was called a cut, or curt-tail
, and by contraction cur. Cut and long-rail-therefore signified the dog of a clown, and the dog of a gentleman. A proverbial expression.
I thank you
35 leave you.
Fent. Sir, will you
thing should Ibave beer, when I had been swellda Page. No, good master Fenton.
I should have been a mountain of mummy. Come,master Shallow ;--come, son Slender; in :
Re-eriter Bardolph, with the wine. Knowing my mind, you wrong me, master Fenton. Now, is the sack brew'd ?
[E.xeunt Page, Shallow, and Slender. 5 Bard. Ay, sir: there's a woman below would Quic, Speak to mistress Page. (daughter speak with you.
Fent. Good mistress Page, for that I love your Fal. Come, let me pour in some sack to the In such a righteous fashion as I do, [ners, Thames water; for my belly's as cold as if I had Perforce, against all checks, rebukes, and man- swallow'd snow-balls for pills to cool the reins. I must advance the colours of my love,
10 Call her in.. And not retire: Let me have your good-will.[fool.
Bard. Come in, womian. Anne. Good mother, do not marry me to yon
Enter Mrs. Quickly. Mrs. Page. I mean it not; I seek you a better Quic. By your leave;--I cry you mercy:--Give husband.
your worship good-morrow. Quic. That's my master, master doctor.
Fal. Take away these chalices: Go brew me Anne. Alas, I had rather be set quick i’ the earth, a pottle of sack finely. And bowl'd to death with turnips.
sir? Mrs. Page. Come, trouble not yourself: Good Fal. Simple of itself; I'll no pullet-sperm in master Fenton,
my brewage.-How now? I will not be your friend, nor enemy :
20 Quic. Marry, sir, I come to your worship froin My daughter will I question how she loves you, mistress Ford. And as I find her, so am I affected;
Fal. Mistress Ford! I have had ford enough: Till then, farewell, sir:-She must needs go in ; I was thrown into the ford; I have my belly-tull Her father will beangry: [Ere.Mrs. Page & Anne.
of ford. Fent. Farewell, gentle inistress; farewell, Nan.25 Quic. Alas the day! good heart, that was not Quic. This is my doing now :-Nay, said I, will
her fault: she does so take on with her men; you castaway your childona fool, and a physician? they mistook their erection. Look on, master Fenton :—this is my doing. Fal. So did I mine, to build upon a foolish woFent. I thank thee; and I
man's promise night give my sweet Nan this ring: There's for 30 Quic. Well, she laments, sir, for it, that it thy pains.
[Exit. would yern your heart to see it. Her husband Quic. Now heaven send thee good fortune! A goes this morning a birding ; she desires you once kind heart he hath: a woman would run through more to come to her between eight and nipe: I fire and water for such a kind heart. But yet, I must carry her word quickly: she'll make you would my master had mistress Anne; or I would 35 amends, I warrant you. master Slender had her; or, in sooth, I would Ful. Well, I will visit her: Tell her so: and master Fenton had her: I will do what I can for bid ,her think, what a man is : let her consider them all three ; for so I have promis'd, and I'll be his frailty, and then judge of my merit. as good as my word; but speciously' for master
Quic. I will tell her. Fenton. Well, I must of another errand to sir 40 Ful. Do so. Between nine and ten, say'st thoud John Falstaff from my two mistresses: What a Quic. Eight and nine, sir. beast am I to slack it!
, be gone: I will not iniss her. Quic. Peace be with you, sir.
[Erit. SCENE V.
Fal. I marvel, I hear not of master Brook; he The Garter inn.
45 sent me word to stay within: I like his money Enter Falstaff and Bardolph.
well. Oh, here he comes. Fal. Bardolph, I say.
Enter Ford. Burd. Here, sir.
Ford. Bless you, sir ! Fal. Go fetchine a quart of sack; puta toast in't. Ful. Now, master Brook? you come to know [Exit Bardolph.] Have I liv'd to be carried in a 50 what hath pass'd between me and Ford's wife? basket, like a barrow of butcher's oftal; and to be Ford. That, indeed, sir John, is my business. thrown into the Thames? Well; if I be serv'd Fal. Master Brook, I will not lie to you; I such another trick, I'll have my brains ta'en out, was at her house the hour she appointed me. and butter'd, and give them to a dug for a new- Ford. And you sped, sir? year's-gift. The rogues slighted me into the river 55 Fal. Very ill-favour’dly, master Brook. with as little remorse as they would have drown'd Ford. How, sir? Did she change her detera bitch's blind puppies, fifteen i’ the litter : and mination ? you may know by my size, that I have a kind of Ful. No, master Brook: but the peaking coralacrity in sinking; if the bottom were as deep as nuto her husband, master Brook, dwelling in a hell, I should down. I had been drown'd, butwo continual ’larum of jealousy, comes me in the that the shore was shelvyand shallow ; a death that instant of our encounter, after we had embrac'd, I abhor; for the water swells a man; and what a kiss'd, protested, and as it were, spoke the pro
' A common proverb in tbe southern counties of England. ? That is, some time to-night. She intends to say, specially.
logne of our comedy; and at their heels a rab- Ated intheir own grease: think of that,-a man of my ble of his companions, thither provok'd and insti- kidney-think of that; that am as subject to heat gated by his distemper, and forsooth, to search as butter; a man of continual dissolution and his house for his wife's love.
thaw; it was a miracle to’scape suffocation. And Ford. What, while you were there?
5 in the height of this bath, when I was more than Ful. While I was there.
half stew'd in grease, like a Dutch dish, to be Ford. And did he search for you, and could thrown into the Thames, and cool'd, glowing hot, : not find you?
in that surge, like a horse-shoe; think of that Fal. You shall hear. As good luck would have hissing hot-think of that, master Brook. it, comes in one mistress Page; gives intelli-10 Ford. In good sadness, sir, I am sorry that for gence of Ford's approach ; and by her invention, my sake you have suffer'd all this. My suit is and Ford's wife's distraction, they convey'd me then desperate; you'll undertake her no inore. into a buck-basket.
Fal. Master Brook, I will be thrown into Ætna, Ford. A buck-basket!
as I have been into Thames,ere I will leave her thus. Ful. Yea, a buck-basket : 'ramm'd me in with 15 Her husband is this morning gone a birding : I foul shirts and smocks, socks, foul stockings, and have receiv'd from her another embassy of meeting: greasy napkins; that, master Brook, there was 'twixt eight and nine is the hour, master Brook. the rankest compound of villainous smell, thay Ford. 'Tis past eight already, sir. ever offende, nostril.
Fal. Is it? I will then address me* to my apFord. And how long lay you there? 20 pointment. Coine to me at your convenient lei.
Fal. Nay, you shall hear, master Brook, what sure, and you shall know how I speed; and the I have sufferd to bring this woman to evil for your conclusion shall be crown'd with your enjoying good. Being thus cramm'd in the basket, a couple her : Adieu. You shall have her, master Brook; of Ford's knaves, his hinds, were call'd forth by master Brook, you shall cuckold Ford. [Erit. their mistress, to carry me in the name of foul cloaths 25 Ford. Hum! ha! is this a vision? is this a to Datchel-lane: they took me on their shoulders ; dream? do I sleep? Master Ford, awake! awake, met the jealousknave their master in the door; who ma-ter Ford; there's a hole made in your best ask'd them once or twice, what they had in their coat, master Ford. This 'tis to be married! this basket: I quak'd for fear, lest the lur:atic knavı 'tis to have linen, and buck-baskets - Well, I would have search d it; but fate ordaining he 30 will proclaim myself what I am: I will now take should be a cuckoll, held his hand. Well; onwenu the lecher; he is at my house: he cannot 'scape he for a search, and away went I for foul cloaths me; 'tis impossible he should; he cannot creep But mark the sequel, master Brook: I suffer'd the into a half-penny purse, nor into a pepper-box: pangs of three several deaths; first, an intolerable but, lest the devil that guides him, should aid fright, to be detected with 'a jealous rotten beli-35 nim, I will search impossible places. Though wether: next, to be compassid, like a good ? bil- what I am I cannot avoid, yet to be what I would bo, in the circumference of a peck, hilt to point, Juot, shall not make me tame: If I have horns to heel to head : and then, to be stopp'd in, like a make one mad, let the proverb go with me, I'll strong distillation, with stinking cloaths that fret- e horn-mad.
Enter Sir Hugh Erans.
How now, sir Ilugh? no school to-day?
1501 Era. No; master Slender is let the boys leave
master" Ford's already, Quic. Blessing of his heart ! think'st thou?
Mrs. Puge. Sir Hugh, my husband says, my son Quic. Sure, he is by this; or will be presently: protits nothing in the world at his book; I pray but truly, he is very courageous mad, about his 53 scu, ask him some questious in his accidence. throwing into the water. Mistress Ford desires Era. Come hither, William ;-hold up your you to come suddenly.
head; come. Mirs. Page. I'll be with her by and by; I'll bill Alrs. Puge. Come on, sirrah; hold up your bring my young man here to school: Look,where head; answer your master, be not afraid. bis master comes; 'tis a playing-day, I see. 160l Era. William, how inany numbers is in nouns?
With was sometimes vised for of. ? A bilbo is a Spanish blade, of which the excellence is flexibleness and elasticity. Kidney in this phrase now signifies kind or qualities; but Falstail means, 4 m2:118 chose kiunijs are us qui us iniiii That is, inahe myself ready,