Ther, Thon art proclaim'd a fool, I think,

Ther. I serve theè not.
Ajax. Do not, porcupine, do not; my fingers itch. Ajax. Well, go to, go to !

Ther. I would thou didst itch from head to foot, Ther. I serve here voluntary.
and I had the scratching of thee; I would make thee Achil. Your last service was sufferance, 'twas not
the loathsomest scab in Greece. When thou art forth voluntary; no man is beaten voluntary: Ajax was
in the incursions, thou strikest as slow as another. here the voluntary, and you as under an impress.
Ajax, I say, the proclamation,

Ther. Even so ? - a great deal of your wit ino lies Ther. Thon grumblest and railest every hour on in your sinews, or else there be liars. Hector shall Achilles and thou art as full of envy at his great-have a great catch, if he knock out either of your ness, as Cerberus is at Proserpina's beauty, ay, that brains ; 'a were as good crack a fusty nut with no thou barkest at him.

kernel.
Ajax. Mistress Thersites!

Achil. What, with me too, Thersites?
Ther. Thou should'st srike him.

Ther. There's Ulysses, and old Nestor, whose
Ajax, Cobloaf!

wit was mouldy, ere your grandsires had nails on Ther. He would pun thee into shivers with his fist, their toes, — yoke you like draught oxen, and make as a sailor breaks a biscuit.

you plough up the wars. Ajax. You whoreson cur !

(Beating him. Achil

. What, what? Ther. Do, do.

Ther. Yes, good sooth; to, Achilles ! to, Ajax! to! Ajax. Thou stool for a witch!

Ajax. I shall cut out your tongue. Ther. Ay, do, do; thou sodden-witted lord! thou Ther. 'Tis no matter; I shall speak as much, as hast no more brain, than I have in mine elbows; an thou, afterwards. assinego may tutor thee: thou scurvy valiant ass! Patr. No more words, Thersites; peace ! thou art here put to thrash Trojans; and thou art Ther. I will hold my peace, when Achilles' brach bought and sold among those of any wit, like a bar-bids me, shall I? barian slave. If thou use to beat me, I will begin at Achil. There's for you, Patroclus! thy heel, and tell what thou art by inches, thou Ther. I will see you hanged, like clotpoles, ere I thing of no bowels, thoa !

come any more to your tents; I will keep where Ajax. You dog!

there is wit stirring, and leave the faction of fools. Ther. You scurvy lord !

(Exit. Ajax. You cur!

(Beating him. Patr. A good riddance. Ther. Mars his idiot! do, rudeness; do, camel; Achil. Marry, this, sir, is proclaim'd through all do, do!

our host,
Enter Achilles and PATROCLUS.

That Hector, by the first hour of the sun,
Achil. Why, how now, Ajax? wherefore do you Will

, with a trumpet, 'twixt our tents and Troy, thus?

To-morrow morning call some knight to arms, How now, Thersites? what's the matter, man? That hath a stomach; and such a one, that dare Ther. You see him there, do you?

Maintain - I know not what; 'tis trash. Farewell!
Achil. Ay; what's the matter?

Ajax. Farewell! Who shall answer him ?
Ther. Nay, look upon him!

Achil. I know not, it is put to lottery; otherwise,
Achil. So I do. What's the matter?

He knew his man.
Ther. Nay, but regard him well!

Ajax, 0, meaning you : — I'll go learn more of it.
Achil. Well, why I do so.

(Exeunt. Ther. But yet you look not well upon him: or, whosoever you take him to be, he is Ajax.

SCENE JI. — Troy. A room in Priam's palace. Achil. I know that, fool!

Enter PRIAM, Hector, Troilus, Paris, and HELENUS. Ther. Ay, but that fool knows not hinself. Pri. After so many hours, lives, speeches spent, Ajax. Therefore I beat thee.

Thus once again says Nestor from the Greeks;
Ther. Lo, lo, lo, lo, what modicums of wit heut- Deliver Helen, and all damage else
ters! his evasions have ears thus long. I have bobb’d As honour, loss of time, travel, expence,
his brain, more than he has beat my bones: 1 will Wounds, friends, and what else dear that is con-
buy nine sparrows for a penny, and his pia mater sum'd
is not worth the ninth part of a sparrow. This lord, In hot digestion of this cormorant war,-
Achilles, Ajax, — who wears his wit in his belly, and Shall be struck off : - Hector, what say you to't?
his guts in his head, I'll tell you what I say Hect. Though no man lesser fears the Greeks than 1,
of him.

As far as toucheth my particular, yet,
Achil. What?

Dread Priam,
Ther. I say, this Ajax -

There is no lady of more softer bowels,
Achil. Nay, good Ajax.

More spungy to suck in the sense of fear,
(Ajax oljers to strike him, Achilles interposes. More ready to cry out - Who knows what follows ?
Ther. Has not so much wit -

Than Hector is. The wound of peace is surety, Achil. Nay, I must hold you.

Surety secure; but modest doubt is call'd
Ther. As will stop the eye of Helen's needle, for the beacon of the wise ; the tent, that searches
whom he comes to fight.

To the bottom of the worst. Let Helen go:
Achil, Peace, fool !

Since the first sword was drawn about this question,
Ther. I would have peace and quietness, but the Every tithe soul, ʼmongst many thousand dismes,
fool will not: he there; that he; look you there! Hath' been as dear as Helen ; I mean, of ours :
Ajax. O thou damned cur! I shall

If we have lost so many tenths of ours,
Achil. Will you set your wit to a fool's ? To guard a thing not ours ; not worth to us,
Ther. No, I warrant you; for a fool's will shame it. Had it our name, the value of one ten;
Patr. Good words, Thersites!

What merit's in that reason, which denies
Achil. What's the quarrel ?

The yielding of her up?
Ajax. I bade the vile owl, go learn me the tenour Tro. Fye, fye, my brother!
of the proclamation, and he rails upon me. Weigh you the worth and honour of a king,

a

reasons:

'Tw
Has
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AU
Wh
Tha
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Anc
To
TH

To
MO
If
AS
0
T

So great as our dread father, in a scale

That in their country did them that disgrace,
Of common ounces? will you with counters sum We fear to warrant in our native place!
The past-proportion of his infinite?

Cas. [Within.] Cry, Trojans, cry!
And buckle-in a waist most fathomless,

Pri. What noisc? what shriek is this?
With spans and inches so diminutive

Tro. 'Tis our mad sister, I do know her voice.
As fears and reasons? fye, for godly shame! Cas. (Within.) Cry, Trojans !
Hel. No marvel, though you bite so sharp at reasons,

Hect. It is Cassandra.
You are so empty of them. Should not our father

Enter Cassandra, raving.
Bear the great sway of his affairs with reasons, Cas. Cry, Trojans, cry! lend me ten thousand eyes,
Because your speech hath none, that tells him so? And I will fill them with prophetic tears.
Tro. You are for dreams and slumbers, brother Hect. Peace, sister, peace!
priest,

Cas. Virgins and boys, mid-age and wrinkled elders,
You fur your gloves with reason. Here are your Soft infancy, that nothing canst but cry,

Add to my clamours ! let us pay betimes
You know, an enemy intends you harm;

A moiety of that mass of moan to come,
You know, a sword, employ'd, is perilous, Cry, Trojans, cry! practise your eyes with tears!
And reason flies the object of all harm:

Troy must not be, nor goodly Ilion stand;
Who marvels then, when Helenus beholds

Our fire-brand brother, Paris, burns us all. A Grecian and his sword, if he do set

Cry, Trojans, cry! a Helen, and a woe: The very wings of reason to his heels;

Cry, cry! Troy burns, or else let Helen go! (Exit.
And fly like chidden Mercury from ve,

Hect. Now, youthful Troilus, do not these high
Or like a star dis-orb’d? -- Nay, if we talk of reason, strains
Let's shut our gates, and sleep: manhood and honour of divination in our sister work
Should have hare hearts, would they but fat their some touches of remorse? or is your blood
thoughts

So madly hot, that no discourse of reason,
With this cramm'd reason: reason and respect

Nor fear of bad success in a bad cause,
Make livers pale, and lustihood deject.

Can qualify the same?
Hect. Brother, she is not worth what she doth cost Tro. Why, brother Hector,
The holding

We may not think the justness of each act
Tro. What is aught, but as 'tis valued ?

Such and no other than event doth form it;
Hect. But value dwells not in particular will; Nor once deject the courage of our minds,
It holds its estimate and dignity

Because Cassandra's mad : her brain-sick raptores
As well wherein 'tis precious of itself

Cannot distaste the goodness of a quarrel,
As in the prizer: 'tis mad idolatry,

Which hath our several honours all engag'd
To make the service greater than the god; To make it gracious. For my private part,
And the will dotes, that is attributive

I am no more touch’d, than all Priam's sons:
To what infectiously itself affects,

And Jove forbid, there should be done amongst as
Without some image of the affected merit. Such things, as might offend the weakest spleen

Tro. I take to-day a wife, and my election To fight for and maintain !
Is led on in the conduct of my will;

Par. Else might the world convince of levity
My will enkindled by mine eyes and ears, As well my undertakings, as your counsels;
Two traded pilots ’twixt the dangerous shores But I attest the gods, your full consent
Of will and judgment: how may I avoid,

I

Gave wings to any propension, and cut off
Although my will distaste what it elected,

All fears attending on so dire a project.
The wife I chose ? there can be no evasion For what, alas, can these my single arms?
To blench from this, and to stand firm by honour: What propugnation is in one man's valour,
We turn not back the silks upon the merchant, To stand the push and enmity of those
When we have soil'd them; nor the remainder viands This quarrel would excite? Yet, I protest,
We do not throw in unrespective sieve,

Were I alone to pass the difficulties,
Because we now are full. It was thought meet, And had as ample power as I have will,
Paris should do some vengeance on the Greeks: Paris should ne'er retract what he hath done,
Your breath with full consent bellied his sails; Nor faint in the pursuit.
The seas and winds (old wranglers) took a truce, Pri. Paris, you speak
And did him service: he touch'd the ports desir’d; Like one besotted on your sweet delights:
And, for an old aunt, whom the Greeks held captive, You have the honey still, but these the gall;
He brought a Grecian queen, whose youth and fresh- So to be valiant is no praise at all.

Par. Sir, I propose not merely to myself
Wrinkles Apollo's, and makes pale the morning. The pleasures such a beauty brings with it;
- Why keep we her? the Grecians keep our aunt: But I would have the soil of her fair rape
Is she worth keeping? why, she is a pearl, Wip'd off, io honourable keeping her.
Whose price hath launch'd above a thousand ships, What treason were it to the ransack'd queen,
And turn'd crown'd kings to merchants.

Disgrace to your great worths, and shame to me,
Jf you'll avouch, 'twas wisdom Paris went,

Now to deliver her possession up
(Aš you must needs, for yon all cry'd - Go, go,) On terms of base compulsion? Can it be,
if you'll confess, he brought home noble prize, That so degenerate a strain as this
(As you must needs, for you all clapp'd your hands should once set footing in your generous
And cry'd — Inestimable !) why do you now There's not the meanest spirit on our party,
The issue of your proper wisdoms rate;

Without a heart to dare, or sword to draw,
And do a deed, that fortune never did,

When Helen is defended; nor none so noble,
Beggar the estimation which you prized

Whose life were ill bestow'd, or death unfam'd,
Richer than sea and land? o`theft most base; Where Helen is the subject: then, I say,
That we have stolen what we do fear to keep! Well may we fight for her, whom, we know well,
But, thieves, unworthy of a thing so stolen, The world's large spaces cannot parallel.

I
S
S

1

ness

bosoms?

a

Hect. Paris, and Troilus, you have both said well; geance on the whole camp! or, rather, the boneAnd on the cause and question now in hand ache! for that, methinks, is the curse dependant on Have gloz'd, — but superficially; not much those that war for a placket. I have said my prayers; Unlike young men, whom Aristotle thought and devil, envy,say Amen. What, ho! my lord Achilles ! Unfit to hear moral philosophy:

Enter PATROCLUS. The reasons, you allege, do more conduce

Patr. Who's there? Thersites? Good Thersites, To the hot passion of distemper'd blood,

come in and rail ! Than to make up a free determination

Ther. If I could have remembered a gilt counter'Twixt right and wrong; for pleasure and revenge feit, thon wouldest not have slipped out of my conHave ears more deaf, than adders to the voice templation: but it is no matter. Thyself upon thyOf any true decision. Nature craves,

self! The common curse of mankind, folly and ignoAl dues be render'd to their owners; now,

rance, be thine in great revenue! heaven bless thee What nearer debt in all humanity,

from a tutor, and discipline come not near thee! Than wife is to the husband? if this law

Let thy blood be thy direction till thy death! then Of nature be corrupted through affection; it'she, that lays thee out, says — thou art a fair corse, And that great minds, of partial indulgence I'll be sworn and sworn upon't, she never shrouded To their benumbed wills, resist the same;

any but lazars. Amen. Where's Achilles ? There is a law in each well-order'd nation

Patr. What, art thou devout? wast thou in prayer ? To curb those raging appetites that are

Ther. Ay; the heavens hear me ! Most disobedient and refractory.

Enter ACHILLES. If Helen then be wife to Sparta's king,

Achil. Who's there? As it is known she is, – these moral laws

Patr. Thersites, my lord ! Of nature, and of nations, speak aloud

Achil. Where, where? – Art thou come? Why, To have her back return'd: thus to persist my cheese, my digestion, why hast thou not served In doing wrong, extenuates not wrong,

thyself in to my table so many meals ? Come what's But makes it much more heavy. Hector's opinion Agamemnon? Is this, in way of truth: yet, ne'ertheless,

Ther. Thy commander, Achilles ; - Then tell me, My spritely brethren, I propend to you

Patroclus, what's Achilles ?
In resolution to keep Helen still ;

Patr. Thy lord, Thersites; then tell me, I pray
For 'tis a cause, that hath no mean dependance thee, what's thyself?
Upon our joint and several dignities.

Ther. Thy knower, Patroclus; then tell me, Pa-
Tro. Why, there you touch'd the life of our design : troclus, what art thou?
Were it not glory that we more affected

Patr. Thou mayest tell, that knowest.
Than the performance of our heaving spleens, Achil. Otell, tell !
I would not wish a drop of Trojan blood

Ther. I'll decline the whole question. Agamemnon Spent more in her defence. But, worthy Hector, commands Achilles ; Achilles is my lord; I am PatroShe is a theme of honour and renown;

clus' knower; and Patroclus is a fool. A spur to valiant and magnanimous deeds ;

Patr. You rascal!
Whose present courage may beat down our foes, Ther. Peace, fool! I have not done.
And fame, in time to come, canonize us:

Achil.Heis a privileged man.- - Proceed, Thersites! For, I presume, brave Hector would not lose Ther. Agamemnon is a fool; Achilles is a fool; So rich advantage of a promis'd glory,

Thersites is a fool; and, as aforesaid, Patroclus is
As smiles upon the forehead of this action,
For the wide world's revenue.

Achil. Derive this; come!
Hect. I am yours,

Ther. Agamemnon is a fool to offer to command You valiant offspring of great Priamus.

Achilles; Achilles is a fool to be commanded of A-
I have a roisting challenge sent amongst

gamemnon; Thersites is a fool to serve such a fool;
The dull and factious nobles of the Greeks, and Patroclus is a fool positive.
Vill strike amazement to their drowsy spirits : Patr. Why am I a fool ?
I was advertis'd, their great general slept,

Ther. Make that demand of the prover; it suffices
Whilst emulation in the army crept;

me, thou art.- Look you, who comes here? This, I presume, will wake him.

[Exeunt. Enter Agamemnon, Ulysses, Nestor, Diomedes, and

AJAX.
SCENE III. — The Grecian camp. Before Achil. Patroclus, I'll speak with nobody. Come
Achilles' tent.
in with me, Thersites!

(Exit. Enter THERSITES.

Ther. Here is such patchery, such juggling, and Ther. How now, Thersites? what, lost in the laby- such knavery! all the argument is, a cuckold, and a rinth of thy fury?Shall the elephantAjax carry itthus ? whore; a good quarrel, to draw emulous factions, he beats me, and I rail at him: 0 worthy satisfaction! and to bleed to death upon. Now the dry serpigo on 'would, it were otherwise; that I could beat him, the subject! and war,and lechery, confound all![Exit. whilst he railed at me. 'Sfoot, I'll learn to conjure Agam. Where is Achilles ? and raise devils, but I'll see some issue of my spiteful Patr. Within his tent; but ill dispos’d, my lord ! execrations. Then there's Achilles, - a rare engineer. Agam. Let it be known to him, that we are here. Jf Troy be not taken till these two undermine it, the He'shent our messengers ; and we lay by walls will stand till they fall of themselves. O thou Our appertainments, visiting of him: great thunder-darter of Olympus, forget that thou Let him be told so; lest, perchance, he think art Jove, the king of gods; and, Mercury, lose all We dare not move the question of our place, the serpentine craft of thyCaduceus ;if ve take not that or know not what we are. little little less-than-little wit from them that they Putr. I shall say so to him.

[Exit. have! which short-armed ignorance itself knows is Ulys. We saw him at the opening of his tent; so abundant scarce, it will not in circumvention de- He is not sick. liver a fly from a spider, without drawing their mas- Ajax. Yes, lion-sick, sick of proud heart: you sy irons, and cutting the web. After this, the ven-'may call it melancholy, if you will favour the man;

a

a fool.

- а

a

reasons:

harm;

a

So great as our dread father, in a scale

That in their country did them that disgrace,
Of common ounces? will you with counters sum We fear to warrant in our native place!
The past-proportion of his infinite ?

Cas. (Within.) Cry, Trojans, cry!
And buckle-in a waist most fathomless,

Pri. What noisc? what shriek is this? With spans and inches so diminutive

Tro. 'Tis our mad sister, I do know her voice. As fears and reasons ? fye, for godly shame! Cas. [Within.] Cry, Trojans ! Hel. No marvel, though you bite so sharp at reasons, Hect. It is Cassandra. You are so empty of them. Should not our father

Enter CASSANDRA, raving. Bear the great sway of his affairs with reasons, Cas. Cry, Trojans, cry! lend me ten thousand eyes, Because your speech hath none, that tells him so? And I will fill them with prophetic tears. Tro. You are for dreams and slumbers, brother Hect. Peace, sister, peace! priest,

Cas. Virgins and boys, mid-age and wrinkled elders, You fur your gloves with reason. Here are your Soft infancy, that nothing canst but cry,

Add to my clamours! let us pay betimes
You know, an enemy

intends
you

A moiety of that mass of moan to come.
You know, a sword, employ'd, is perilous,

Cry, Trojans, cry! practise your eyes with tears ! And reason flies the object of all harm:

Troy must not be, nor goodly Ilion stand; Who marvels then, when Helenus beholds

Our fire-brand brother, Paris, burns us all. A Grecian and his sword, if he do set

Cry, Trojans, cry! a Helen, and a woe: The very wings of reason to his heels;

Cry, cry! Troy burns, or else let Helen go! (Erit

. And fly like chidden Mercury from Jove,

Hect. Now, youthful Troilus, do not these high Or like a star dis-orb’d? -- Nay, if we talk of reason, strains Let's shut our gates, and sleep: manhood and honour of divination in our sister work Should have hare hearts, would they but fat their some touches of remorse? or is your blood thoughts

So madly hot, that no discourse of reason, With this cramm'd reason: reason and respect

Nor fear of bad success in a bad cause,
Make livers pale, and lustihood deject.

Can qualify the same?
Hect. Brother, she is not worth what she doth cost Tro. Why, brother Hector,
The holding.

We may not think the justness of each act Tro. What is aught, but as 'tis valued ?

Such and no other than event doth form it; Hect. But value dwells not in particular will; Nor once deject the courage of our minds

, It holds its estimate and dignity.

Because Cassandra's mad : her brain-sick raptores As well wherein 'tis precious of itself

Cannot distaste the goodness of a quarrel, As in the prizer: 'tis mad idolatry,

Which hath our several honours all engag'd To make the service greater than the god; To make it gracious. For my private part, And the will dotes, that is attributive

I am no more touch'd, than all Priam's sons : To what infectiously itself affects,

And Jove forbid, there should be done amongst as Without some image of the affected merit. Such things, as might offend the weakest spleen

Tro. I take to-day a wife, and my election To fight for and maintain!
Is led on in the conduct of my will;

Par. Else might the world convince of levity
My will enkindled by mine eyes and ears, As well my undertakings, as your counsels:
Two traded pilots 'twixt the dangerous shores But I attest the gods, your full consent
Of will and judgment : how may I avoid,

Gave wings to my propension, and cut off Although my will distaste what it elected,

All fears attending on so dire a project. The wife I chose ? there can be no evasion For what, alas, can these my single arms? To blench from this, and to stand firm by honour: What propugnation is in one man's valour, We turn not back the silks upon the merchant, To stand the pu-l and enmity of those When we have soil'd them; nor the remainder viands This quarrel w **cite? Yet, I protest, We do not throw in unrespective sieve,

Were I alone

. the difficulties, Because we now are full. It was thought meet, And had as Wer as I have will, Paris should do some vengeance on the Greeks: Paris shor

tract what he hath done Your breath with full consent bellied his sails; Nor fain'

uit. The seas and winds (old wranglers) took a truce, Pri. P

ak And did him service: he touch'd the ports desir'd; Like :

} your sweet delights And, for an old aunt, whom the Greeks held captive, You

still, but these the He brought a Grecian queen, whose youth and fresh- So

o praise at all.

0

se not merely to my Wrinkles Apollo's, and makes pale the morning.

h a beauty brings wil Why keep we her? the Grecians keep our aunt :

the soil of her fair ? Is she worth keeping? why, she is a pearl,

vourable keeping her
Whose price hath launch'd above a thousand shi

Toit to the ransacla
And turn'd crown'd kings to merchants.

rent worth:
If you'll avouch, 'twas wisdom Paris went,
(As you must needs, for yon all cry'd - Go, g
If you'll confess, he brought home noble pris
(As you must needs, for you all clapp'd your
and cry'd — Inestimable?) why do you now
The issue of your proper wisdoms rate;
And do a deed, that fortune never did,
Beggar the estimation which you prized
Richer than sea and land ? o`theft most
That we have stolen what we do fear to
But, thieves, noworthy of a thing so

ness