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he hath pawn'd his horses to mine host of the Garter. Page. Hang 'em, slayes; I do not think the knight
Mrs Ford. Nay, I will consent to act any villainy would offer it: but these, that accuse him in his intent
Ford. Were they his men ?
voyage towards my wife, I would turn her loose to
[They retire. let it lie on my hcad.
to turn them together. A man may be too confident:
Page. Look where my ranting host of the Garter
host? Ford. Love my wife?
Enter Host, and Shallow.
Shal, I follow, mine host, I follow.-Good even, and
twenty, good master Page! Master Page, will you go
with us? we have sport in hand.
Shal. Sir, there is a fray to be fought, between sir
Hugh the Welch priest, and Caius the l'rench doctor.
(Exit Pistol. Ford. Good mine host o'the Garter, a word with yon. Fall Ford. I will be patient; I will hud out this.
Host. What say’st thou, bully-rook?[They go aside. Quic Nym. And this is true; (to Page.]I like not the hu- Shal, Will you (to Page go with us to beholdit? mour oflying. He hath wronged me in some humours; My merry host hath had the measuring of their weaI should have borne the humoured letter to her; but í pons; and, I think, he hath appointed them contrary havea sword, and it shall bite upon my necessity. He places : for, believe me, I hear, the parson is no jester. FC loves your wife; there's the short and the long. My Hark, I willtell you what our sport shall be. name is corporal Nym; I speak, and I avouch. 'Tis Host. Hast thou no suit against my knight, my guesttrne:—my nameis Nym, and Falstaff loves your wife. cavalier?
Page. The humour of it, quoth 'a! here's a fellow name is Brook; only for a jest.
Host. My hand, bully: thou shalt have egress and re-
gress; said I well? and thy name shall be Brook: It is fu Page. I never heard sueh a drawling, affecting rogue. a merry knight: – Will you go on, hearts ?
OLE Ford. IfI do find it, well.
Shal. Ilave with you, mine host. Page. I will not believe such a Cataian, though the . Page. I have heard, the Frenchman hath good skill priest o' the town commended him for a true man.
in his rapier. Ford. 'Twas a good sensible fellow : well.
Shal, Tut, sir, I could have told you more: in these Page. How now, Meg?
times you stand on distance, your passes, stoccadoes, Mrs Page. Whither go you, George ? -- Hark yon. and I know not what: 'tis the heart, master Page;'tis Mrs Ford. How now, sweet Frank? why art thoa me- here, 'tis here. I have seen the time, with my long lancholy?
sword, I would have made you four tall fellows skip Ford. Í melancholy? I am not melancholy. — Get like rats. you home, go,
Host. Here, boys, liere, here! shall we wag
g? Mrs Ford. 'Faith, thou hast some crotchets in thy Page. Have with you :-I had rather hear them scold head now, Will you go, mistress Page?
(Exeunt Host, Shallow, and Page. Mrs Page. Have with you. – You'll come to dinner, Ford. Thongh Page be a secure fool, and stands so George?-Look, who comes yonder: she shall be our firmly on his wife's frailty, yet I cannot put off my messenger to this paltry knight. [ Aside to Mrs Ford. opinion so easily: She was in his company at Page s Enter Mistress QUICKLY.
house; and, what they made there, I know not. Well, Mrs Ford. Trust me, I thought on her: she'll fit it. I will look further into't: and I have a disguise to Mrs Page. You are come to see my daughter Anne? sound Falstatt. If I find her honest, I lose not mylaQuick. Äy, forsooth; And, I pray, how does good bour; if she be otherwise, 'tis labour well bestowed. mistress Anne? * Mrs Page. Go in with us, and see; we have an hour's talk with you,
SCENE II.- A room in the Garter Inn.
Enter FALSTAFF and PISTOL.
Fal. I wiil not lend thee a pemuy.
. Why, then the world's mine oyster, which I not?
with sword will open. I will retort the sum in equiPage. Yes; and you licard what the other told me?
page. Ford. Do you think there is truth in them? i Fal. Not a penny. I have been content, sir, you
un his intent
should lay my conntenance to pawn: I have grated Fal. But what says she to me? be brief, my good she
Quick. Ay, forsooth; and then you may come and sce Pist. Didst thou not share? hadst thou not fifteen the picture, she says, that you wot of; -master Ford, pence?
her husband, will be from home. Alas! the sweet woPal. Reason, you rogue, reason : think'st thou I'll man leads an ill life with him; he's a very jealousy man; endanger my soul gratis? At a word, hang no more she leads a very frampold life with him, good heart. about me, I am no gibbet for you: go!-A short knife Fal. Ten and eleven : woman, commend ine to her; and a throng;
to your manor of Pickthatch, go. I will not fail her.
good parts aside, I have no other charms.
Fal. But, I pray thee, tell me this: has Ford's wife,
and Page's wife, acquainted each other how they Quick. Give your worship good-morrow.
lore me? Fal. Good-morrow, good wife.
Quick. That were a jest, indeed! they have not so Quick. Not so, an't please your worship.
little grace, I hope :--that were a trick, indeed! But Tal. Good maid, then.
mistress Page would desire you to send your little Quick. I'll be sworn; as my mother was, the first hour page, of all loves; her husband has a marvellous inI was born.
fection to the little page: and, truly, master Pageis Fal. I do believe the swearer. What with me? an honest man. Never a wife in Windsor leads a bet
Quick. Shall I vouchsafe your worship a word or ter life than she does; do what she will, say what she two?
will, take all, pay all, go to bed when she list, rise Fal. Two thousand, fair woman; and I'll vouchsafe when she list, all is as she will; and, truly, she deserthee the hearing:
ves it: for if there be a kind woman in Windsor, she Quick. There is one mistress Ford, sir; I pray, is one. You must send her your page; no remedy. come a little nearer this ways! — I myself dwell with Fal. Why, I will. master doctor Cains.
Quick. Nay, but do so then : and, look yon, he
may Fal. Well, on: Mistress Ford, you say,
come and go between you both ; and, in any case, have Quick. Your worship says very true; I pray your a nay-word, that you may know one another's mind, worship, come a little nearer this ways.
and ihe boy never need to uwderstand any thing; for Fal. I warrant thee, nobody hears ; mine own 'tis not good that children should know any wickedpeople, mine own people.
ness: old folks, you know, have discretion, as they Quick. Are they so ? Heaven bless them, and make say, and know the world. them his servants !
Fal. Fare thee well: commend me to them both: Fal. Well: Mistress Ford; what of her?
there's my purse; I am yet thy debtor.-Boy, go along Quick. Why, sir, she's a good creature. Lord, lord! with this woman !—This news distracts me. your worship's a wanton: well, heaven forgive you,
[Exeunt Quickly and Robin. and all of us, I pray!
Pist. This punk is one of Cupid's carriers :--
Enter BARDOLPH. wine and sugar of the best, and the fairest, that would Bard. Sir John, there's one master Brook below have won any womans’s heart; and, I warrant you, they would fain speak with you, and be acqnainted with could never get an eye-wink of her. “I had myself you; and hath sent your worship a morning's draught twenty angels given me this morning: bat I defy all an- Pal. Brook, is his name?
of sack. gels, (in any such sort, as they say,) but in the way of Bard. Ay, sir. honesty:-and, I warrane you, they could never get her Pal. Call him in. (Exit Bardolph.] Such Brooks are so much as sip on a cup with the proudest of them all: welcome to me, that o'erflow such liquor. Ah! ha! and yet there has been earls, nay, which is more, pen- mistress Ford and mistress Page, have I encompassed sioners; but, I warrant you, all is one with her.
r them soroll , and Page ad stands
putol mar Wat Pagpi not real disgnise to not mrla bestowed. Esit
go to; via!
Re-enter BARDOLPH, with Ford, disguised. lowed for your many war-like, court-like, and learned Ford. Bless you, sir.
preparations. Fal. And you, sir. Would you speak with me? Ful. O, sir! Ford. I make bold to press with so little preparation Ford. Believe it, for you know it!— There is money; upon you.
spendit, spend it; spend more; spend all I have; only Fal. You're welcome: what's your will? – Give us give me so much of your time in exchange of it, as to lay leave, drawer!
(Exit Bardolph. an amiable siege to the honesty of this Ford's wife: use Ford. Sir, I am a gentleman that have spent much; your art of wooing, win her to consent to you ; if'any my name is Brook.
man may, you may as soon as any. Fal. Good master Brook, I desire more acquaintance Fal. Would it apply well to the vehemence of your
affection, that I should win what you would enjoy? ford. Good sir John, I sue for yours: not to charge Methinks, you prescribe to yourself very preposteyou; for I must let you understand, I think myself'in rously. better plight for a lender than you are: the which Ford. O, understand my drift! she dwells so securely hath something embolden'd me to this unseason’d in- on the excellency of her honour, that the folly of my trusion; for they say, if money go before, all ways soul dares not present itself:she is too bright to be lookdo lie open.
led against. Now, could I come to her with any detecFal. Money is a good soldier, sir, and will on. tion in my hand, my desires had instance and argument Ford. Troth, and I have a bag of money here tron- to commend themselves; I could drive her then from bles me: if you will help me to bear it, sir John, take all, the ward of her purity, her reputation, her marriageor half, for easing me of the carriage.
vow, and a thousand other her defences, which now are Fal. Sir, I know not how I may deserve to be your too strongly embattled against me. What say you to't, porter.
sir Jolin? Ford. I will tell you, sir, if you will give me the hea- Fal. Master Brook, I will first make bold with your ring.
money;next, give me your hand;and last, as I am a gentFal. Speak, good master Brook; I shall be glad to be leman, you shall, if you will, enjoy Ford's wife. your servant.
Ford, 0, good sir ! Ford. Sir, I hear you are a scholar, - I will be brief Fal. Master Prook, I say you shall. with you ; - and you have been a man long known to Ford. Want no money, sir John, you shall want none. me,though I had never so good means as desire,to make Fal. Want no mistress Ford, master Brook, you shall myself acquainted with you. I shall discover a thing want none. I shall be with her, (I may tell you,) by her
I to you, wherein í must very much lay open mine on
own own appointment;even as you came in to me, her assisimperfection : but, good sir John, as you have one eye tant, or go-between, parted from me: I say, I shall be upon my follies, as you hear them unfolded, turn an- with her between ten and eleven; for at that time the other into the register of your own,that I may pass with jealous rascally knave, her husband, will be forth. a reproof the easier, sith you yourself know, how easy Come you to me at night; you shall know how I speed. it is to be such an offender.
Ford. I am blest in your acquaintauce. Do you know Fal. Very well, sir; proceed !
I'ord, sir? Ford. There is a gentlewoman in this town, her hus- Fal. Hang him, poor cuckoldly knave! I know him band's name is Ford,
not:-yet I wrong him, to call him poor; they say, the Fal. Well, sir.
jealous wittolly knave hath masses of money; for the Ford. I have long loved her, and, I protest to you, be- which his wife seems to me well-favoured. I will use stowed much on her ; followed her with a doting ob- her as the key of the cuckoldly rogue's coffer; and servance; engrossed opportunities to meet her ; fee'd there's my harvest-home. every slight occasion that could but niggardly give me Ford. I'would you knew Ford, sir; that sight of her; not only bought many presents to give avoid him, if you saw him, her, but have given largely to many, to know what she Fal. Hang him, mechanical salt-butter rogue! I will would have given: brielly, I have pursued her, as love stare him out of his wits ; I will awe him with my cudhath pursued me; which hath been, on the wing of all gel: it shall hang like a meteor o'er the cuckold's horns: occasions. But whatsoever I have merited, either in master Brook, thou shalt know, I will predominate o’er my mind or in my means, meed, I am sure, I have recei- the peasant, and thou shalt lie with his wife. Come to ved none; unless experience be a jewel: that I have me soon at night:-Ford's a knave, and I will aggravate purchased at an infinite rate; and that hath taught me his stile; thou, master Brook, shalt know him for a
knave and cuckold :--come to me soon at night. (Exit. Love like a shadow flies, when substance love pursues; Ford. What a damned Epicurean rascal is this!-- My Pursuing that that flies, and flying what pursues. heart is ready to crack with impatience.- Who says,
Fal. Have you received no promise of satisfaction at this is improvident jealousy? My wife hath sent to her hands?
him, the hour is fixed, the match is made. Would any Ford. Never.
man have thought this?--See the hell of having a false Fal. Have you importuned her to such a purpose? woman! my bed shall be abused, my coffers ransackFord. Never.
ed, my reputation grawn at; and I shall not only Fal. Of what quality was your love then?
receive this villainous wrong, but stand under the adFord. Like a fair house, built upon another man's loption of abominable terms, and by him that does me ground ; so that I have lost my edifice by mistaking the this wrong. Terms! names ! - Amaimon sounds well; place where I erected it.
Lucifer, well; Barbason, well; yet they are devils’adFal. To what purpose have you unfolded this to me? ditions, the names of fiends: but cuckold! wittol-cu
Ford. When I have told you that, I have told you all. ckold! the devil himself hath not such a name. Page Some say, that, though she appear honest to me, yet, in is an ass, a secure ass, he will trust his wife, he will not other places,she enlargeth her mirth so far, that thereis be jealous: I will rather trust a Fleming with my butshrewd construction made of her. Now, sir John, here ter, parson Hugh the Welchman with my cheese, an is the heart of my purpose: You are a gentleman of ex- Irishman with my aqua-vitae bottle, or a thief to walk cellent breeding, admirable discourse, of great admit- my ambling gelding, than my wife with herself: then tance, authentic in your place and person, generally al-she plots, then she ruminates, then she devises: and
to say this :
ce is money;
have; only tit, as to li d's wife: use -For;
a; il aj
ence of you could cojos? y preposte
Is ma secarely
for of my it to be look
ch anr detecnd argument er then fra er mange Chichwora say y ca tote
what they think in their hearts, they may effect, they Caius. By gar, me do look, he shall clapper-de-claw
, and laugh at Page. I will about it; better three Host. And moreover, bully, —but first, master guest, hours too soon, than a minute too late. Fie, fie, fie! and master Page, and eke cavalero Slender, go you cuckold ! cuckold ! cuckold !
[Exit. tlırough the town to Frogmore. (Aside to them.
Page. Sir Hugh is there, is he?
Host. He is there: see what humour he is in; and I
will bring the doctor about by the fields will it do well ? Caius. Jack Rugby!
Shal. We will do it.
Page. Shal. and Slen. Adieu, good master doctor. Caius. Vat is de clock, Jack?
[Exeunt Page, Shallow, and Slender. past the hour, sir, that sir Hugh promised Caius. By gar, me vill kill de priest; for he speak for
a jack-an-ape to Anne Page. Caius. By gar, he has save his soul, dat he is no come; Ilust. Lethim die: but, first, sheath thy impatience; he has pray his Pible vell, dat he is no come; by gar, throw cold water on thy choler: go about the fields Jack Rugby, he is dead already, if he be come. with me through Frogmore; I will bring thee where Rug. He is wise, sir; he knew your worship would mistress Anne Pageis, at a farm-house a-teasting; and kill him, if he came.
thou shall woo her. Cry'd game, said I well? Caius. By gar, de herring is no dead, so as I vill kill Caius. By gar, me tank you for dat: by ga., I love him. Take your rapier, Jack ; I vill tell you, how I vill you; and I shall procure-a you de good guest, de earl, kill him.
de knight, de lords, de gentlemen, my patients. Rug. Alas, sir, I cannot fence.
Host. For the which, I will be thy adversary towards
Anne Page; said I well?
Caius. By gar, 'tis good; vell said.
Caius. Come at my heels, Jack Rugby. [Lxeunt.
Enter Sir Hugh Evans and SIMPLE.
ry way; old Windsor way, and every way but the town
Eva. I most fehemently desire you, you will also look
Sim. I will, sir.
Shal. He is the wiser man, master doctor: he is a cu- ved me :-- how melancholies I am! – I will knog his rer of souls, ayd you a curer of bodies; if you should urinals about his knave's costard, when I have good fight, you go against the hair of your professions ; is opportunities for the 'ork :- 'pless my soul! (Sings. it not true, master Page?
To shallow rivers, to whose falls Page. Master Shallow, you have yourself been a great Melodious birds sing madrigals; fighter, though now a man of peace.
There will we make our peds of roses, Shal. Bodykins, master Page, though I now be old, And a thousand fragrant posies. and of the peace, if I see a sword out, my finger itches To shallow to make one: though we are justices, and doctors, and 'Mercy on me! I have a great dispositions to cry. churchmen, master Page, we have some salt of our Melodious birds sing madrigals ;youth in us;
we are the sons of women, master When as I sut in Pabylon. Page. 'Tis true, master Shallow.
And a thousand vagram posies. Shal. It will be found so, master Page. Master doctor To shallow Caius, I am come to fetch you home. Iam sworn of the Sim. Yonder he is coming, this way, sir Ilugh. peace; you have showed yourself a wise physician, Eva. He's welcome and sir Hugh hath shewn himself a wise and patient To shallow rivers, to whose fallschurchman: you must go with me, master doctor. Heaven prosper the right! - What weapons is he? Host. Pardon, guest Justice! - A word, monsieur Sim. No weapons, sir: there comes my master, masMuck-water.
ter Shallow, and another gentleman from Frogmore, Caius. Muck-vater! vatis dat?
over the stile, this way.
Shal. How now,
master parson? Good-morrow, good
sir Hugh. Keep a gamester from the dice, and a good Hest. He will clapper-claw thec tightly, bully.
student from his book, and it is wonderful.
Slen. Ah, sweet Anne Page!
Page. Save you, good sir Hugh!
imivate o'er fe. Come to Il aggravate # lum for a sht. Eirih this:-
Who sata, aath soul ta Jould any
ving a false is ransacka
Il not only
der thuada at does the unds velly derilsado vittol-chame. Page he will not
h my but
vill cut his ears.
ef to walk
Eva. 'Pless you from his mercy sake, all of you ! koog our prains together, to be revenge on this same Shal. What! the sword and the word! do you study scall, scarvy, cogging companion, the host of the them both, master parson?
Garter. Page. And youthful still, in your doublet and hose, Caius. By gar, vit all my heart; he promise to bring this raw rheumatick day?
me vereis Anne Page: by gar, he deceive me too. Eva. There is reasons and causes for it.
Eva. Well, I will smite his noddles ! — Pray you, Page. We are come to you, to do a good office,master follow.
SCENEII. - The street in Windsor. Eva, Fery well: what is it?
Enter Mistress Pace, and Robin. Page. Yonderi
a most reverend gentleman, who, Mrs Page. Nay, keep your way, little gallant; you belike, having received wrong by some person, is at were wont to be a follower, but now you are a leader. most odds with his own gravity and patience, that ever Whether had you rather, lead mine eyes, or eye your you saw.
master's heels? Shal. I have lived fourscore years, and upwards; I Rob. I had rather, forsooth, go before
Mrs Page. O you are a flattering boy; now,
see, Eva. What is he?
you'll be a courtier. Page. I think you know him; master doctor Caius,
Enter FORD. the renowned French physician.
Ford. Wellmet, mistress Page: whither go you? Eva. Got's will, and his passion of my heart! I had MrsPage. Truly,sir, to see your wife. Is she at home?
would tell me of a mess of porridge. Ford. Ay; and as idle as she may hang together, for Page. Why?
want of company: I think, if your husbands were dead, Eva. He has no more knowledge in Hipocrates and you two would marry. Galen, -and he is a knave besides; a cowardly knave, Mrs Page. Be sure of that, -two other husbands. as you would desires to be acquainted withal. Ford. Were had you this pretty weathercock? Page. I warrant you, he's the man should fight with Mrs Page. I cannot tell what the dickens his name is Slen. O, sweet Anne Page!
him. my husband had him of. What do you call your
Rob. Sir John Falstaff.
Ford. Sir John Falstaff!
is such a league between my good man and he! --- Is Host. Disarm them, and let them question; let them your wife at home, indeed ? keep their limbs whole, and hack our English.
Ford. Indeed, sheis. Caius. I pray you, let-a me speak a vord vit your ear: Mrs Page. By your leave, sir; - I am sick, till I see verefore vill you not mcet-a me?
[Exeunt Mrs Page and Robin. Eva. Pray you, use your patience; in good time. Ford. Has Page any brains? hath he any eyes? hath Caius. By gar, you are de coward, de Jack dog, John heany thinking? Sure they sleep; he hath vo use of аре.
them. Why, this boy will carry a letter twenty miles, Eva. Pray you, let us not be laughing-stogs to other as easy as a cannon will shoot point blank twelvescore. men's humours; I desire you in friendship, and I will He pieces-out his wife's inclination ; he gives her folly one way or other make you amends :-I will knog your motion, and advantage : and now she's going to my nrinals about your knave's cogscomb, for missing wife, and Falstafl's boy with her. A man may hear this your meetings and appointments.
shower sing in the wind !--and Falstaff's boy with her! Caius. Diable !--- Jack Rugby, – mine Host de Jar- Good plots! -- they are laid; and oär revolted terre, have I not stay for him, to kill him? have I not, wives share damnation together. Well; I will take at de place I did appoint?
him, then torture my wife, pluck the borrowed veil of Eva. As I am a Christians soul, now, look you, this modesty from the so seeming mistress Page, divulge is the place appointed ; I'll be judgment by mine host Page himself for a secure aud wilful Actaeon ; and to of the Garter.
these violent proceedings all my neighbours shall cry Host. Peace, I say, Guallia and Gaul, French and aim. [Clock strikes.] The clock gives me my cue, and Welch; soul-curer and body-curer.
my assurance bids me search; there I shall find FalCaius. Ay, dat is very good! excellent!
staff : I shall be rather praised for this, than mocked; Host. Peace, I say; hear mine host of the Garter. for it is as positive as the earth is firm, that Falstaff is Am I politick ? am I subtle ? am I a Machiavel ? Shall there: I will go. I lose my doctor ? no; he gives me the potions, and Enter Pace, SHALLOW, SLENDER, Host, Sir Hugh the motions, Shall I lose my parson? my priest? my
Evans, Caius, and Rugby. sir Hugh? no; he gives me the proverbs, and the Shal. Page, etc. Well met, master Ford. no-verbs. Give me thy hand, terrestrial ; so: — Ford. Trust me, a good knot: I have good cheer at Give me thy hand, celestial; so.-- Boys of art, I home; and, I pray you, all go with me. have deceived you both; I have directed you to wrong Shal. I must excuse myself, master Ford. places : your hearts are mighty, your skins are whole, Slen. And so must I, sir ; we have appointed to dine and let burnt sack be the issue. Come, lay their with mistress Anne, and I would not break with her for swords to pawn! – Follow me, lad of peace; follow, more money than I'll speak of. follow, follow !
Shal. We have lingered abont a match between Shal. Trust me, a mad host!- Follow, gentleman, Anne Page and my cousin Siender, and this day we follow!
shall have our answer. Slen. O, sweet Anne Page!
Slen. I hope, I have your good will, father Page? (Exeunt Shallow, Slender, Page, and Host. Page. You have, master Slender; I stand wholly for Caius. Ha! do I perceive dat? have you make-a de you :- but my wife, master doctor, is for you altosot of us? ha, ha!
gether. Eva. This is well; he has made us his vlouting-stog. Caius. Ay, by gar; and de maid is love-a me: my
I desire you, that we may be friends, and let us nursh-a Quickly tell me so much.