Ulyss. You shall command me, sir. As gentle tell me, of what honour was Tro. O, sir, to such as boasting show their scars, [Exeunt. ACT V. SCENE, I. The Grecian Camp. Before Achilles' Tent. Enter ACHILLES and PATROCLUS. Achil. I'll heat his blood with Greekish wine to- Which with my scimitar I'll cool to-morrow.- Patr. Here comes Thersites. Achil Enter THERSITES. How now, thou core of envy; Thou crusty batch of nature, what's the news? Ther. Why, thou full dish of fool, from Troy. Ther. The surgeon's box, or the patient's wound. The surgeon's box,] In this answer Thersites quibbles upon the word tent. Patr. Well said, Adversity! and what need these tricks? Ther. Pr'ythee be silent, boy; I profit not by thy talk thou art thought to be Achilles' male varlet. Patr. Male varlet, you rogue! what's that? Ther. Why, his masculine whore. Now the rotten diseases of the south, the guts-griping, ruptures, catarrhs, loads o'gravel i'the back, lethargies, cold palsies, raw eyes, dirt-rotten livers, wheezing lungs, bladders full of imposthume, sciaticas, limekilns i'the palm, incurable bone-ach, and the rivelled fee-simple of the tetter, take and take again such preposterous discoveries! Patr. Why thou damnable box of envy, thou, what meanest thou to curse thus? Ther. Do I curse thee? Patr. Why, no, you ruinous butt; you whoreson indistinguishable cur, no. Ther. No? why art thou then exasperate, thou idle immaterial skein of sleive silk, thou green scarcenet flap for a sore eye, thou tassel of a prodigal's purse, thou? Ah, how the poor world is pestered with such water-flies; diminutives of nature! Patr. Out, gall! Ther. Finch egg!1 Achil. My sweet Patroclus, I am thwarted quite From my great purpose in to-morrow's battle. Here is a letter from queen Hecuba; A token from her daughter, my fair love; * Well said, Adversity!] Adversity, in this instance, signifies contrariety. The reply of Thersites has been studiously adverse to the drift of the question urged by Patroclus. 9-thou idle immaterial skein of sleive silk,] All the terms used by Thersites of Patroclus, are emblematically expressive of flexibility, compliance, and mean officiousness. • Finch egg!] A finch's egg is remarkably gaudy; but of such terms of reproach it is difficult to pronounce the true signification. Both taxing me, and gaging me to keep Come, come, Thersites, help to trim my tent; [Exeunt ACHILLES and PATROCIUS. Ther. With too much blood, and too little brain, these two may run mad; but if with too much. brain, and two little blood, they do, I'll be a curer of madmen. Here's Agamemnon,-an honest fellow enough, and one that loves quails; but he has not so much brain as ear-wax: And the goodly transformation of Jupiter there, his brother, the bull, the primitive statue, and oblique memorial of cuckolds; a thrifty shoeing-horn in a chain, hanging at his brother's leg,-to what form, but that he is, should wit larded with malice, and malice forced with wit, turn him to? To an ass, were nothing he is both ass and ox: to an ox were nothing; he is both ox and ass. To be a dog, a mule, a cat, a fitchew, a toad, a lizard, an owl, a puttock, or a herring without a roe, I would not care but to be Menelaus,-I would conspire against destiny. Ask me not what I would be, if I were not Thersites; for I care not to be the louse of a lazar, so I were not Menelaus.-Hey-day! spirits and fires 13 2 Enter HECTOR, TROILUS, AJAX, AGAMEMNON, ULYSSES, NESTOR, MENELAUS, and DIOmed, with lights. Agam. We go wrong, we go wrong. 2 - a fitchew,] i. e. a polecat. 3 spirits and fires!] This Thersites speaks upon the first sight of the distant lights. Achil. Welcome, brave Hector; welcome, princes all. Agam. So now, fair prince of Troy, I bid good night. Ajax commands the guard to tend on you. Hect. Thanks, and good night, to the Greeks' general. Men. Good night, my lord. Hect. Good night, sweet Menelaus. Ther. Sweet draught: Sweet, quoth 'a! sweet sink, sweet sewer. Achil. Good night, And welcome, both to those that Agam. Good night. go, or tarry. Exeunt AGAMEMNON and MENELAUS. Achil. Old Nester tarries; and you too, Diomed, Keep Hector company an hour or two. Dio. I cannot, lord; I have important business, The tide whereof is now.-Good night, great Hector. Hect. Give me your hand. Ulyss. To Calchas' tent; I'll keep you company. - Follow his torch, he goes [Aside to TROILUS. And so good night. Tro. Sweet sir, you honour me. [Exit DIOMED; ULYSS. and TRO. following. Achil. Come, come, enter my tent. [Exeunt ACHIL. HECTOR, AJAX, and Nest. Ther. That same Diomed's a false-hearted rogue, a most unjust knave; I will no more trust him when he leers, than I will a serpent when he hisses: he will spend his mouth, and promise, like Brabler the hound; but when he performs, astronomers foretell it; it is prodigious, there will come some change; the sun borrows of the moon, when Diomed keeps his word. I will rather leave to see Hector, than not to dog him: they say, he keeps a Trojan drab, and uses the traitor Calchas' tent: I'll after. -Nothing but lechery! all incontinent varlets! [Exit. SCENE II. The same. Before Calchas' Tent. Enter DIOMEDES. Dio. What are you up here, ho? speak. Cal. [Within.] Who calls? Dio. Diomed.-Calchas, I think.-Where's daughter? Cal. [Within.] She comes to you. your Enter TROILUS and ULYSSES, at a distance; after them THERSITES. Ulyss. Stand where the torch may not discover us, Enter CRESSIDA. Tro. Cressid come forth to him! Dio. Cres. Now, my sweet guardian!-Hark! a word with you. 1 How now, my charge? [Whispers. he will spend his mouth, and promise, like Brabler the hound;] If a hound gives his mouth, and is not upon the scent of the game, he is by sportsmen called a babler or brabler. $prodigious,] i. e. portentous, ominous. |