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A MATCH FOR THE SQUIB.
To the Old Moon-Raker. Sir, PresUMING that my first letter is unanswerable since it merely states facts, and asks no question, 1 proceed to investigate the substance of your last letter, which is really nothing more nor less than a wretchedly manufactured Electioneering Squib. It is true it possesses some of those essential qualities which are requisite to a squib, it has the slow fire, the quick fire, and the BOUNCE! but they are loosely connected! they are not well rammed in! a little shaking will ruin the whole composition, and your invaluable production will explode at the application of the first spark, and blow up “the Gentleman" constituting the bounce in the tail. But ere i present to the Printers my match (for so I chuse to
I call this my letter) which their press is to bring to light, I will take to pieces your ill-organised serpent, and carefully examine its contents. 'I will rake out the dross from your case, and expose.it to the public eye! I give you notice that I will then apply my match to the mass, and thus prevent the unwary from falling into danger.
And first, as to the slow fire.-- More than one half of your squib is composed of a tedious account of yourself ; commence ing, like the generality of last dying speeches, with “ the birth, the parentage, and the education." Without vanity I hope Í ,
I may say that I am one of your own judicious men, to whom either of these pretensions can signify nothing." I would rather“ refute your arguments,” than « descant on your deformities” or beauties. As therefore the slow fire is composed of too much egotism, I conclude it to be radically bad, and ineffectual.
The quick fire is all that relates to Mr. Long Wellesley: Even the slightest allusion to bim, be it never so abusive, brings to my mind the illuminating brilliancy of his talents, and all those his commanding qualifications, which have been nurtured and improved in the noblest families in this kingdom ; in that school of discipline and glory, the army of his illustrious uncle, the immortal Duke of Wellington, and in the Commons House of Parliament of these realms. Tell us not of " local interests !” We have here in one man the gentleman! the soldier! and the senator! The gentleman, by birth, by parentage, and education; every qualification necessary to form that character exists in every act and deed of Mr. Long Wellesley. I wish to put his “ merits" in competition with those of that gentleman whose merits" (as you observe) “ are now too clearly ascertained." I said Mr. Long Wellesley is a Soldier ! I say fur
ther, although his spirit is too great to allow him to be content with mere 6 local” knowledge, with mere mechanical information ; yet that same spirit has accompanied him in the hour of danger! He bas gallantly fought the battles of his country! and with whom bas he fought them? Why, with a noble relative, whose transcendant fanie will doubtless be admired and venerated by your own descendants, Mr. Moon-Raker, forty years hence!! Aye, even after forty years hence! The Very Quorum, and the great Fish! and the Old Moon-Raker! and Timothy Trueman, will then bear the same weight in the scale of memory as the old Poll Book now bears, and be of the same utility, but of less " notoriety!" The persons who fought those battles with that great man will be admired then more than you admire them now for their manly conduct, and all those eminent qualities which distinguish the accomplished gentleman and the finished soldier from the man of mere local information, and local habils, and local interests.
I said Mr. Long Wellesley is a Senator ! and so he is ! and an independent one too; there is no cause for his being otherwise : he hunts for no place, no pension, no sinecure to repair bis shattered fortune, nor does he act under the control of any person or set of persons whomsoever.
As to “the representation of the county being the heir-loom of Mr. Wellesley's family,” the assertion began and rests with yourself; and there I leave it.
As to the “ interest for life” which Mr. Long Wellesley has ! whatever his interest may be, bis property (to use your own words) “is certainly as adequate to the station which he aspires to, as any member of the county could boast of in the recollection of the oldest among us. As to 66
government influence ;” the thing is denied to be true, and known to be false.
As to the censure of professional gentlemen ;" if the minds of only two professional men assimilated so nearly as the initials of their names follow in the order of the alphabet, probably the county would not have heard of those names in the whole course of this election tragedy! but certainly not in the first scene of the first act.
As to the application of abusive epithets to magistrates;" the repetition of this charge shews the weakness of your powers of invention; it has been answered again and again--it bas been met and resisted by Mr. Long Wellesley like many other charges of the enemy. After the manner in which he has discomfited the enemy in this case, it would be cruelty itself to interfere,
As to “ the dissemination of private attacks against Mr. Benett;” no gentleman can say that Mr. Long Wellesley ever countenanced their circulation in the slightest degree.
• As to the tenants' advertisements ;" they were as voluntary
86 as unexpected, and repeated only so often as the tenants themselves requested it.-But
As to to the dinner at Marlborough ;" I leave you to digest the one; you probably were there on Friday the 22d instant. Any remarks upon that independent dinner must be too ridicu- . lous to waste time about, if the reports that have been circulated relative to it are correct.
I leave you to cool upon this quick fire, with which I think you, in common with some of your friends, either have, or might have, a little burnt your fingers!
And now, as to the bounce in the tail, I perceive you have placed in that unenviable situation “ a gentleman,” who, I hope, is at least a good tempered man, for his own sake, for he must expect a little rubbing up now, and a great deal more at the Poll. Next to bis 6 local” qualifications,“ his honesty, at the risk of popularity,” is brought to our view.
No one doubted it!-but it opens the door to a question, Mr. Moon-Raker, and I call upon you, as a man advanced a doubt, and not because I doubt, " Has your friend, Mr. John Benett, acted according to his judgment at the risk of unpopularity." If he has, he has done more than another gentleman who exhibits himself a candidate for the representation of a certain county in Parliament.
You define the honesty which belongs to your favourite Candidate as that which has enabled him to run counter to the general opinion and good judgment of all the rest of mankind ! and I admit this extraordinary talent to be, indeed, a most singular qualification for a knight of the shire.
The allusion to those whom you call “ adverse to the Church," is the last and most combustible article of your composition. You have inserted it by mistake in the bouncing part of the squib. It had no business there ! and serves to confirm me in my first opinion of the imperfection of your perforinance in every particular.
I have examined your stuff as I promised. I fear it will scarcely go off in a whis! It may percbance bounce! but it will most assuredly end in confusion and smoke! The
compositors are at work, and the printers and printer's devils have applied their press to my match, and my match to your mass.I rest, in safety from its effects; Your's most obediently,
To the Old Moon-Raker. SIR, Ir is no recommendation to your cause to say deception may be necessary to its support ; and it i« a very serious
objection to it that you dare to uphold and toil to defend such deceptions.
It is no doubt within your recollection that you attempted to be very jocose and very sarcastic on the circuinstances attending one election dinner, and it is now necessarily to be expected that your history of a more recent one will be equally entertaining. For really the public are quite disappointed, and their expectations altogether baulked, at the very “meagre" detail the first printed account of that memorable " entertainment" has afforded. Not one word as to the number of guests, or whether the single room that contained them was farge or small, whether the company were all freeholders or agents, or friends in the interest of your “great Apollo," or whether many were not careless of, not a few hesitating, and some absolutely inimical, to the peculiar merits. of that gentleman. In brief, a more imperfect and less interesting record of an event from which so much was expected, and so litlle fulfilled, it has been rarely our misfortune to peruse. It was indeed a voice, but nothing else. Note withstanding, however, these endeavours to blind us from the truth, it must not be entirely omitted in the “Chronicles" of Wiltshire, that a gentleman confessedly a contemner of our Parliament and who considers it a degradation to represent a free county, was selected to preside at a public entertainment, which originated in the desire of one candidate to extinguish the generosity of another, though advertised under a specious disguise of ill-concealed subterfuge. Supporting this gentleman was seen, on the one hand, a candidate who solicits our support on every ground of judgment and independence, (but whose conduct on this occasion entitles him to neither,) and on the left hand seat one of our present members condescended to identify himself with the intentions, and the principles, and the success of the projector of the meeting, Common report and general belief have said more—they bave spread rapidly and boldly the cry of coalition ! they have given authorities and gained proselytes—hundreds have heard and believed, -and Mr. Methuen has come forward to refute the charges.—How satisfactorily, how successfully I leave others to believe; for myself it is enough to know that he acknowledges the folly of his conduct, and the justice of our suspicions.
Now these, Sir, are circumstances, and occurrences, quite “new” to our county, and sufficiently extraordinary and unexpected to challenge our attention.—And when we add to these, the unusual interference that obstrueted a gentleman who was desirous of raising the character of the meeting by resolutions calculated to uphold the real independence of the
county. That meeting forms a picture of so original a design, and of so characteristic an execution, that it will be difficult to persuade us it exhibits any thing that demands our approbation, or that it adds one beauty to the collection, with which we are tempted by the object of your admiration.
You conclude your last letter with often refuted charges against Mr. Wellesley. And although you have failed and will fail to convince us that it is no recommendation to one of our Candidates that he is nearly allied to a “particular family," and that he has "ample possessions,” and honour and independence, and ability, and withal a desire to use these gifts for the benefit of our county, merely because one of his advertisements was not penned to your critical liking; and although you pertinaciously repeat charges about professional gentlemen, and magistrates, and landlords, and te. nants, which you cannot prove, I suppose you will still continue to mould and remould your antique materials. At parting, however, receive in good-wise this one piece of friendly advice :-Talk as much as you please about heir looms, and territorial possessions, and Draycot House and its possessor's independent and happy tenantry, for then you will exall those claiins you wish to annihilate. But “ breathe not a syllable “ of that entertainment where the possessor of Pythouse “supported” the chair, and where a party “ of freeholders and others" have lately been carousing,” or you will infallibly quite puff to pieces the little chance of success which yet remains to that cause you hoped to have substantiated.
I am, Sir, your very obedient servant, Neither here nor THERE.
To the Editor of the Salisbury Gazette. P.S. Pray inform“ Titus Trueman,” that he is mistaken in supposing that I was at Mr. Wellesley's dinner. I hope my friend Titus will rise early and trot over the plain on the morning of the nomination, that I may have the pleasure of shaking him by the hand at Devizes, where we can discuss our principles and those of our favourite Candidates. He knows that it is not indolence, nor a want of inclination, that prevents my meeting him on the ground he has chosen.-His great objection to Mr. Methuen appears to be that he has voted on both sides-he wants party men, and of the government party. He will, I have no doubt, pay some regard to a venerable Bishop's opinion of such men, and therefore I will give him an extract from the life of the late Bishop of Llandaff:
Page 106. “ The best partisans“ are men of great talents