All characters who attempt to appear what they are not, while they endeavour to cheat the world, are the dupes of their own vanity. No one can by sensible men be esteemed as greater than his fellow citizens because he keeps his hat on when civility induces others to uncover their heads; but if such an one seeks the applause or admiration of fools, let him have his reward. An indelicacy (to say the least of it) is obtaining among some of our young men,on their entrance to churches, public assemblies, theatres or elsewhere; they seem to imagine that the longer they keep their hats on when entering a meeting house, the greater their frolics at the door of an assembly room, and the louder their noise on entering a box at the theatre, the greater their consequence: while some, as if wishing others to suppose they were constantly attended by servants, to perform the necessary acts of civility for them, leave the doors open, unmindful of the silent rebuke of female delicacy, that turns its eye in vain to discover any gentleman who could be guilty of such conduct. Ingenuas didicisse fideliter artes Emollit mores, nec sinet esse feros. Exchange Coffee House. We profess not to be men of business, but we think we have seen something of the world. The house built for the president in Philadelphia, after remaining several years unoccupied, was profitably engaged by public spirit; the purchaser of Morris' buildings has made an ample fortune; the City Hotel in New York, was bought by an individual, who thereby cleared an immense property; and it appears only to require a similar spirit in the rich inhabitants of Boston, to enable them to boast of the most elegant building, and the best house of general and polite entertainment in America. At this house was given on Tuesday evening, perhaps the most splendid ball and entertainment ever witnessed in the United States; here was no "half faced fellowship," no attempt to unite affected style with natural vulgarity: all was ease, elegance, and harmony; the company consisted of about three hundred ladies and gentlemen, for whom an entertainment was prepared, that displayed the union of liberality and taste; every delicacy delicately served up, gratified the eye, while it refreshed the palate; and the correspondent decor ations and attentions, exemplified that generous ardour to please, which has on all similar occasions been witnessed in Mr. Hamilton. The Theatre. We shall not pretend to dignify our observations on dramatic representations with the title of Criticisms or Critiques; much less shall we presume to inform the public how they ought to think; we shall offer only our own opinions; which,perhaps, may prove as erroneous as those of our predecessors. And as a proof of the probability of such an event, we shall begin by observing that it is our opinion that no one who has hitherto undertaken the task of a critic in Boston, within the sphere of our reading, has had a knowledge of theatrics in any way competent to the decisions he has made. Let therefore the heretofore critics remain content under the shade of ignorance, for if they assert knowledge, we shall be forced to impute some character of a less ingenuous nature. It is not by the indiscriminate puffing of a private friend, or by the general abuse of those who are personally unknown to them, that critics can expect safety from the ordeal of their own justice, nor can such conduct either authorize them to assume, or justify the public in sanctioning, such a title. The public has a right to exact from every editor the performance of one essential and unalienable duty, they have a right to exact correct information, or at least information intendedly correct. The editor may mistake in judgment, but when he asserts facts, those facts should be incontestible. Proceeding upon this fundamental principle, we shall never insert any communications (or rather puff collateral) on the subject of theatrical representations; we will think and write for ourselves. "We would not flatter Neptune for his trident." We mean to be independent in our own opinion but not restrictive of the judgment of others. We shall give our ideas freely of the public, the managers, and actors, but let it be remembered that they will be only our own ideas; we presume not to speak with the town's tongue. Our object is the dignity of the drama and its professors, and it is with regret that we find our first duty of an unpleasant nature. Theatre, Wendesday, Nov. 15, 1809. To sport with the feelings or even the name of the unfortunate, to make the abuse of either subservient to private policy, to delude with false and groundless expectations, or to endeavour to veil self interest under the cloak of charity or beneficence, is vile and vicious in the extreme. Under which of the above standards the managers of our theatre think proper to enlist, they may perhaps on an investigation of their own conduct with respect to this evening, determine: We know they cannot fly from all. We were told on Monday evening, that the profits of Wednesday, were to be given to a gentleman in sickness and distress. The profits! when it was well known that the receipts from the performances advertised could not be expected to yield one half of the supposed expenses. Admirable liberality! we have experienced such instances of the liberality of the managers before. May they not be imagined to have reasoned thus? There is to be a grand ball on Tuesday night; the ladies will be tired, they will not attend us on Wednesday, let us then advertize Wednesday for the benefit of this gentleman, and we may perhaps by these means gain more than we otherwise should, and be also thought to be at least the instruments of public generosity. Happily, they found that the public had been hitherto too much deceived to be deceived again: and fortunately they have left to the solid principles of humanity to effect for the unfortunate sufferer that intended advantage, which had it been offered on this occasion would have been absorbed in the vortex of their pretended expenses. This incidental circumstance has elicited observations, as we think suitable to the occasion, when the managers act honourably to the public, our applause will be equally unequivocal. Religion. In vain on talents we rely For happiness or ease; We envy only can defy When we ourselves can please. But temper'd by Religion's laws, A friend, that whisp'ring its applause, Rosina sings sweetly, she dances with grace, Her delicate touch each soft wild note can trace, O'er these, which are virtues in sensible minds, She trusts to her God, to her Saviour, and finds Ergo apis matinæ More modoque Grata carpentis Thyma per laborem-In plain english, not under the sun's but under the moon's countenance, like our brother editors westeal. As, therefore we confess ourselves the occasional subjects, they who criticise by rule, cannot with any grammatical propriety make us the objects, of reflexion. Bashaw's Tails. Yes, when we A bashaw with three tails! "Risum tencatis amici consider correctly the title itself, and the origin of it. They are not three of Lord Monboddo's tails, nor three tails to a wig, commonly called pig-tails, but they are horses tails, borne before them as ensigns. Among the Tartars aud the Chinese, a horse's tail is still the standard under which they go to war, and in Turkey it is considered as a mark of dignity; the reason of which is, that their standard being once taken by the enemy, the general of the army cut off his horse's tail, fastened it to the top of a pike, and displayed it to the army; by which he rallied his soldiers who were in great confusion, exhilarated their courage, and gained a complete victory. The bashaws of three tails, are those who are entitled to have carried before them three horses tails, fastened to a pike with a gold button. Guillotine. It is generally supposed that this instrument, by which the unfortunate Louis the sixteenth suffered, was invented by Monsieur Guillo. tin, a physician, and a member of the national assembly in 1791. The illiberal sarcasms licentiously indulged respecting the expedition physicians use in despatching their patients, perhaps continue to promulge this error; Monsieur Guillotin certainly introduced it to France, and we think with humane intentions, but the invention of it cannot be ascribed to him. For, it was formerly used in England, in the limits of the forest of Hardwicke in Yorkshire, and was called A Maiden; the executions were generally at Halifax. criminals suffered by it in the reign of queen Elizabeth; twelve more were executed by it between 1623 and 1650; after which it is supposed that the privilege was no more respected. That machine is now destroyed, but there remained one not long ago (and it may be there still) in the Parliament House at Edinburgh, by which the regent Morton suffered. Twenty-five Virgil. As we propose making our little work useful as well as entertaining, we shall occasionally introduce a few classical remarks. Virgil in the first book of the Eneid, v. 321, speaking of Harpalyce, the Thracian Amazon, and praising her extreme swiftness, says, that she went faster than the Hebrus. Volucremque fuga prævertitur Hebrum. Is it any thing wonderful that she should outrun a river which was never remarkable for its rapidity? There are but few rivers which a man on foot might not overtake, walking at a common pace. Virgil undoubtedly wrote Volucremque fuga prævertitur Eurum. Intending to say, what is frequently expressed by a very common hyperbole, that she went faster than the wind, as in other places. Illi æquore aperto Ante Euros Zephyrumque volant. Equo prævertere ventos. Fugit ocyor Euro, &c. Again, it stands in the common Delph, editions. Huic Conjux Sichæus erat ditissimus agri. Phænicum. It appears clearly by what follows, that Pygmalion killed Sichæus, to have his gold: |