Scrawl on, 'till death release us from the strain, Yet what avails the sanguine poet's hope, what once-loved minstrels scarce may claim Shall hoary Granta call her sable sons, Expert in science, more expert at puns? Shall these approach the muse? ah, no! she flies, Even from the tempting ore of Seaton's prize; Though printers condescend the press to soil With rhyme by Hoare, and epic blank by Hoyle¶: Not him whose page, if still upheld by whist, Requires no sacred theme to bid us list**. Ye! who in Granta's honours would surpass, Must mount her Pegasus, a full-grown ass; A foal well worthy of her ancient dam, Whose Helicon is duller than her Cam. ttThere Clarke, still striving piteously "to please," Forgetting doggrel leads not to degrees, A would-be satirist, a hired buffoon, A monthly scribbler of some low lampoon, In the first ediu "Outlaw'd Sherwood's." Oh! dark asylum of a Vandal race*! For me, who, thus unask'd**, have dared to tell Then, hapless Britain! be thy rulers blest The senate's oracles, the people's jest! Still har thy motley orators dispense The flowers of rhetoric, though not of sense, While Canning's colleagues hate him for his wit, And old dame Portland§§ fills the place of Pitt. Yet once again adieu! ere this the sail That wafts me hence is shivering in the gale; And Afric's coast and Calpe's TT adverse height, And Stamboul's*** minarets must greet my sight: Thence shall I stray through beauty's native climettt, Where Kaff is clad in rocks, and crown'd with snows sublime. "Into Cambridgeshire the Emperor Probus transported a consider able borly of Vandals."-Gibbons Decline and Fall, p. 83, vol. ii. There is no reason to doubt the truth of this assertion; the breed is still in high perfection. These four lines were substituted for the following in the original manu Gcript: Yet hold-as when by Heaven's supreme behest, In Sodom's fated town, for Granta's name So lost to Phabus, that, &c.-This couplet, thus altered in the fifth edition, was originally printed, "So sunk in dulness, and so lost in shame, That Smyth and Hodgson scarce redeem thy fame." Yet what avails. &c.-The following twelve lines were introduced in tion displays unquestionable genius may well be expected to excel in orick the second edition "Toere humo, victorque virum volitare per ora." Like the rhanie midst her fires.-The devil take that phoenix! "And even spurns the great Seatonian prize." The in the original manuscript: With odes by Smyth, and epic songs by Hoyle; The "Games of Hoyle," well known to the votaries of whist chess, &c. are not to be superseded by the vagaries of his poetical namesake, whose poem comprised, as expressly stated in the advertisement, all the "plagisa of Egypt." it There larke, still striving, &c.-These eight lines were added in the second edition. Hight enough this was well deserved, and well laid on.-MS. note by Lord Byron. 1816. This person, who has lately betrayed the most rabid symptoms of confirmed authorship, is writer of a poem denominated the " Art of Pleasg," as "lucus a non lucendo," containing little pleasantry and less poetry. He also ac as monthly stipendiary and collector of calumnies for the Satirist." If this unfortunate young man would exchange the maazines for the mathematics, and endeavour to take a decent degree in his university it might eventually prove more serviceable than his present alary nal composition, of which it is to be hoped we shall soon see a splendi specimen. Hewson Clarke, Esq., as it is written. "Is" in the first edition. The "Aboriginal Britons," an excellent poem, by Richards. tt Zeal for her honour, &c.-In the first edition this couplet ran, Has bade me spurn the follies of her age." II And urge thy bards to gain a name like thine.-With this verse the satire ended in the original edition. SSA friend of mine being asked why his grace of Portland was likene-] to an old woman? replied," he apposed it was because he was past hearing."-His grace is now gathered to his grandmothers, where h sleeps as sound as ever; but even his sleep was better than hie colleagues' waking. 1811. Afric's coast. Saw it, August, 1809.-MS. note by Lord Byron 1816. But should I back return, no tempting press* The shade of fame through regions of vertu ; Thus far I've held my undisturb'd career, But should I back return, no tempting press This thing of rhyme I ne'er disdained to own- These four lines were altered in the fifth edition. They originally stood, Learn'd to deride the critic's starch decree, "But should I back return, no letter'd sage Shall drag my common-place book on the stage; Let vain Valencia rival luckless Carr, And equal him whose work he sought to mar." "Credat And break him on the wheel he meant for me; Lord Elgin would fain persuade us that all the figures, with and Nor care if courts and crowds applaud or hiss; without noses, in his stone-shop, are the work of Phidias! Judæus !" too can hunt a poetaster down; Nay more, though all my rival rhymesters frown, 'classic." ↑ Rapid. Thus altered in the fifth edition. In all previous editions, "Rapid," indeed! He topographized and typographized King Priam's dominions in three days - called him "classic" before I saw the Troad, but since have learned better than to tack to his name what don't belong to it.-Note to the Afth edition. Mr. Gell's Topography of Troyt and Ithacat cannot fail to ensure the approbation of every man possessed of classical taste, as well for the information Mr. Gell conveys to the mind of the reader, as for the ability and research the respective works display.-Note to all the early editions. Since seeing the plain of Troy, my opinions are somewhat changed as to the above note. Gell's survey was hasty and superficial.-MS. note by Lord Byron. 1816. • Lord Valencia (whose tremendous travels are forthcoming with due decorations, graphical, topographical, typographical) deposed, on Sir John Carr's unlucky suit, that Dubois's satire prevented his purchase of the "Stranger in Ireland."--Oh, fie, my lord? has your lordship no more foeling for a fellow-tourist? but " two of a trade," they say, &c. Troy. Visited both in 1810 and 1811.-MS. note by Lord Byron. 1816. Ithaca. Passed first in 1809.—MS. note by Lord Byron. 1816. And, arm'd in proof, the gauntlet cast at once -Din of Melbourne house.-Singular enough, and din enough t Thus much I've dared to do; how far my lay." 1 The greater part of this satire I most sincerely wish had never bove written not only on account of the injustice of much of the critical, and some of the personal part of it--but the tone and temper are such as I ca not approve.-Byron. July 14, 1816. Diodati, Geneva. THE FOLLOWING ARGUMENT INTENDED FOR THE SATIRE WAS IN THE ORIGINAL MANUSCRIPT, BUT NOT PUBLISHED. The poet considereth times past and their poesy-maketh a suiden transition to times present-is incensed against book-makers-revileth W. Scots for cupidity and ballad-mongering, with notable remarks on Master Southey-complaineth that Master Southey hath inflicted three poema epic and otherwise on the public-inveigheth against Wm. Wordsworth; but laudeth Mr. Coleridge and his elegy on a young ass-is disposed to vituperate Mr. Lewis-and greatly rebuketh Thomas Little (the late,) and the Lord Strangford-recommendeth Mr. Hayley to turn his attention to prose. and exhorteth the Moravians to glorify Mr. Grahame-sympathizeth with the Rev. Bowles-and deploreth the melancholy fate of Montgomery -breaketh out into invective against the Edinburgh Reviewers-calleth them hard names, harpies, and the like-apostrophiseth Jeffrey and prophesieth-Episode of Jeffrey and Moore, their Jeopardy and deliverance; portents on the morn of combat; the Tweed, Tolbooth, Frith of Forth severally shocked; descent of a goddess to save Jeffrey; incorporation of the bullets with his sinciput and occiput-Edinburgh Reviewers en masse -Lord Aberdeen, Herbert, Scott, Hallam, Pillans, Lambe, Sydney Smith, Brougham, &c.-The Lord Holland applauded for dinners and transla tions.-The Drama; Skeffington, Hook, Reynolds, Kenney, Cherry, &c.-Sheridan, Colman, and Cumberland called upon to write return le poesy-scribblers of all sorts-Lords sometimes rhyme; much better not-Hafiz, Rosa Matilda, and X. Y. Z.-Rogers, Campbell, Gifford, &c., true poets-translators of the Greek Anthology-Crabbe-Darwin's style Cambridge-Seatonian Prize-Smyth-Hodgson-Oxford-RichardsPoeta loquitur-conclusion. POSTSCRIPT.* I have been informed, since the present edition went to the press, that my trusty and well-beloved cousins, the Edinburgh Reviewers, are preparing a most vehement critique on my poor, gentle, unresisting Muse, whom they have already so be-deviled with their ungodly ribaldry: "Tantæne animis cœlestibus iræ !" I suppose I must say of Jeffrey as Sir Anthony Aguecheek saith, "an I had known he was so cunning of fence, I had seen him damned ere I had fought him." What a pity it is that I shall be beyond the Bosphorus before the nex: number has passed the Tweed! But I yet hope to light my pipe with 1 in Persia. "the age of sions, and in daily expectation of sundry cartels; but, alas chivalry is over," or in the vulgar tongue, there is no spirit now-a-days. There is a youth ycleped Hewson Clarke (Subaudi esquire), a sizer of Emmanuel College, and, I believe, a denizen of Berwick-upon-Tweed, whom I have introduced in these pages to much better company than h has been accustomed to meet; he is, notwithstanding, a very sad dog, and for no reason that I can discover, except a personal quarrel with a bear, kept by me at Cambridge to sit for a fellowship, and whom the jealousy of his Trinity contemporaries prevented from success, has been abusing me and what is worse, the defenceless innocent above mentioned, in "The Satirist" for one year and some months. I am utterly unconscious of having My northern friends have accused me, with Justice, of personality to- given him any provocation; indeed, I am guiltless of having heard his name wards their great literary anthropophagus, Jeffrey; but what else was to till coupled with "The Satirist." He has therefore no reason to complain, be done with him and his dirty pack, who feed by lying and slandering," and I dare say that, like Sir Fretful Plagiary, he is rather pleased than and slake their thirst by "evil speaking?" I have adduced facts already otherwise. I have now mentioned all who have done me the honour to well known, and of Jeffrey's mind I have stated my free opinion, nor has notice me and mine, that is, my bear and my book, except the editor of be thence sustained any injury ;--what scavenger was ever soiled by being "The Satirist," who, it seems, is a gentleman-God wot! I wish he could pelted with mud? It may be said that I quit England because I have impart a little of his gentility to his subordinate scribblers. I hear that ersured there" persons of honour and wit about town," but I am coming Carlisle: I hope not: he was one of the few, who, in the very short inters Mr. Jerningham is about to take up the cudgels for his Mæcenas, Lord back again, and their vengeance will keep hot til my return. Those who know me can testify that my motives for leaving England are very different course I had with him, treated me with kindness when a boy, and what from fears, literary or personal: those who do not, may one day be con-ever he may say or do," pour on, I will endure." I have nothing further vinced. Since the publication of this thing, my name has not been con- to add, save a general note of thanksgiving to readers, purchasers and couled; I have been mostly in London, ready to answer for my transgres-publishers, and, in the words of Scott, i wish • Added to the second edition. To all and each a fair good night, And rosy dreams and slumbers light" HINTS FROM HORACE. BEING AN ALLUSION IN ENGLISH VERSE TO THE EPISTLE "AD PISONES, DE ARTE POETICA," AND INTENDED AS A SEQUEL TO "ENGLISH BARDS AND SCOTCH REVIEWERS." "Ergo fangar vice cotis, acutum Reddere quæ ferrum valet, exsors ipsa secandi." HOR. De Arte Poet 304, 305. " Rhymes are difficult things-they are stubborn things, sir.' Atheas. Capuchin Convent, March 12th, 1811. WHO would not laugh, if Lawrence, hired to grace His costly canvass with each flatter'd face, Abused his art, till Nature, with a blush, Saw cits grow centaurs underneath his brush? Or, should some limner join, for show or sale, A maid of honour to a mermaid's tail? Poets and painters, as all artists know, A labour'd, long exordium, sometimes tends Thus many a bard describes in pompous strain King's Coll., Cam's stream, stain'd windows, and old walls: Or, in advent'rous numbers, neatly aims Humano capiti cervicem pictor equinam Scimus, et hanc veniam petimusque damusque vicissim: Serpentes avibus geminentur, tigribus agni. Incœptis gravibus plerumque et magna professi In an English newspaper, which finds its way abroad wherever there tre Englishmen, I read an account of this dirty dauber's caricature of Mr. H, and the consequent action, &c. The circumstance is proba ay too well known to require further comment. "Where pu e escription held the place of sense."-Pope. You sketch a tree, and so perhaps may shineBut daub a shipwreck like an alehouse sign; You plan a vase-it dwindles to a pot; Then glide down Grub-street-fasting and forgot; Laugh'd into Lethe by some quaint review, Whose wit is never troublesome till true. In fine, to whatsoever you aspire, Let it at least be simple and entire. The greater portion of the rhyming tribe (Give ear, my friend, for thou hast been a scribe) Are led astray by some peculiar lure. I labour to be brief-become obscure; Fish in the woods, and boars beneath the waves; Unless your care's exact, your judgment nice, Dear authors! suit your topics to your strength, Sed nunc non erat his locus: et fortasse cupressum In vitium ducit culpe fuga, si caret arte. • Mere common mortals were commonly content with one tailor and with one bill, but the more particular gentlemen found it impossible to confide their lower garments to the makers of their body clothes. I speak of the beginning of 1809 what reform may have since taken place I neither know nor desire to know. Nor lift your load, before you're quite aware Let judgment teach him wisely to combine As forests shed their foliage by degrees, Though swamps subdued, and marshes drain'd, sustain Sumite materiem vestris, qui scribitis, equam Ordinis hæc virtus erit et venus, aut ego fallor, Ut silvæ foliis pronos mutantur in annos; Mr. Pitt was liberal in his additions to our parliamentary tongue, as may be seen in many publications, particularly the Edinburgh Review. Old ballads, old plays, and old women's stories, are at present in as much request as old wins or new speeches. In fact this is the millennium of black letter: thanks to our Hebers, Webers, and Scotts! As custom arbitrates, whose shifting sway The immortal wars which gods and angels wage, The slow, sad stanza will correctly paint The lover's anguish or the friend's complaint. But which deserves the laurel, rhyme or blank? Which holds on Helicon the higher rank? Let squabbling critics by themselves dispute This point, as puzzling as a Chancery suit. Satiric rhyme first sprang from selfish spleen. You doubt-see Dryden, Pope, St. Patrick's dean. Blank verse is now, with one consent, allied To Tragedy, and rarely quits her side. Though mad Almanzor rhymed in Dryden's days, No sing-song hero rants in modern plays; While modest Comedy her verse foregoes For jest and punt in very middling prose. Not that our Bens or Beaumonts show the worse, Or lose one point, because they wrote in verse. But so Thalia pleases to appear, Poor virgin! damn'd some twenty times a year! Whate'er the scene, let this advice have weight; Adapt your language to your hero's state. At times Melpomene forgets to groan, And brisk Thalia takes a serious tone; Nor unregarded will the act pass by Where angry Townly lifts his voice on high. Again, our Shakspeare limits verse to kings, When common prose will serve for common things; And lively Hal resigns heroic ire, To "hollowing Hotspur " and the sceptred sire. 'T is not enough, ye bards, with all your art, Quæ nunc sunt in honore vocabula, si volet usus, Descriptas servare vices operumque colores, Non satis est pulchra esse poemata; dulcia sunt • Mac Flecknoe, the Dunciad, and all Swift's lampooning halleds Whatever their other works may be, these originated in personal feeling and angry retort on unworthy rivals; and though the allity of these as tires elevates the poetical, their poignancy detracts from the personaj character of the writers. With all the vulgar applause and critical abhorrence of puns, they have Aristotle on their side, who permits them to crators, and gives the n consequence by a grave disquisition. And in his ear I'll hollow, Mortimer !"-1 Henry IV. Command your audience or to smile or weep, If banish'd Romeo feign'd nor sigh nor tear, To skilful writers it will much import, But if a new design you dare essay, "T is hard to venture where our betters fail, For you, young bard! whom luckless fate may lead Whence spring their scenes, from common life or court; The temper'd warblings of his master lyre, Whether they seek applause by smile or tear, Or follow common fame, or forge a plot. Who cares if mimic heroes lived or not? One precept serves to regulate the scene: Make it appear as if it might have been. If some Drawcansir you aspire to draw, Ut ridentibus arrident, ita flentibus addent Difficile est proprie communia dicere; tuque Soft as the gentler breathing of the lute, "Die mihi, Musa, virum capta post tempora Troja Tu, quid ego et populus mecum desideret, aud!. About two years ago a young man, named Townsend, was ann minced by Mr. Cumberland (in a review since deceased) as being engaged in aa epic poem to be entitled "Armageddon." The plan and specimen pro mise much; but I hope neither to offend Mr. Townsend nor his friends by recommending to his attention the lines of Horace to which these rhymes allude. If Mr. Townsend succeeds in his undertaking, as there is reason to hope, how much will the world be indebted to Mr. Cumber. land for bringing him before the public! But till that eventful day arrives, it may be doubted whether the premature display of his plan (sublime a the ideas confessedly are) has not, by raising expectation too high, or diminishing curiosity, by developing his argument, rather incurred the hazard of injuring Mr. Townsend's future prospects. Mr. Cumberland (whose talents I shall not depreciate by the humble tribute of my praise) and Mr. Townsend must not suppose ine actuated by unworthy motives in this suggestion. I wish the author all the success he can wish himself, and shall be truly happy to see epic poetry weighed up from the bathos where it les sunken with Southey, Cottle, Cowley (Mrs, or Abraham), Ogilvy, Wilkie, Pye, and all the "dull of past and present days." Even if he is not a Milton, he may be better than Blackmore; if not a Home, au Antimachus. I should deem myself presumptuous, as a young man, in offering advice, were it not addressed to one still younger. Mr. Townsend has the greatest difficulties to encounter: but in conquering them he wil find employment; in having compered them, his reward. I know too well the scribbler's scoff, the critic's contumely," and I am afraid time will teach Mr. Townsend to know them better. Those who succeed, and those who do not must bear this alike, and it is hard to say which have most of it. I trust that Mr. Townsend's share will be from envy-he will soon know mankind well enough not to attribute this expression to malice. The above note was written before the author was apprised of Bår Cumberland's death. |