Can Love Last?: The Fate of Romance over Time"A beautiful and brilliant reexamination of love and its perils."—Barbara Fisher, Boston Globe Common wisdom has it that love is fragile, but leading psychoanalyst Stephen A. Mitchell argues that romance doesn't actually diminish in long-term relationships—it becomes increasingly dangerous. What we regard as the transience of love is really risk management. Mitchell shows that love can endure, if only we become aware of our self-destructive efforts to protect ourselves from its risks. "Those who read this book will love more wisely because of it."—Andrew Solomon, author of The Noonday Demon "[A] work on romance that is rich and multi-layered."—Publishers Weekly "Cheerful, open, and humane—you'd definitely have wanted him as your analyst."—Judith Shulevitz, The New York Times Book Review "[T]houghtful, compassionate, and profoundly optimistic."—JoAnn Gutin, Salon.com |
From inside the book
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Page 11
... human intelligence , the intricacies of genetics , the increasing likelihood of producing a viable human clone . The issues that touch most directly on our everyday experience , however , remain somehow opaque , mysterious ...
... human intelligence , the intricacies of genetics , the increasing likelihood of producing a viable human clone . The issues that touch most directly on our everyday experience , however , remain somehow opaque , mysterious ...
Page 13
... human experience . Immersing himself in the divisions and controversies within psy- choanalysis , Stephen became interested in what he felt were Foreword 13.
... human experience . Immersing himself in the divisions and controversies within psy- choanalysis , Stephen became interested in what he felt were Foreword 13.
Page 16
... experience this way . " Lis- tening to Stephen in our study group I've often imagined him as a weaver , always ... human experience of passionate connection , to pause and search your own thoughts and experience as you consider the ...
... experience this way . " Lis- tening to Stephen in our study group I've often imagined him as a weaver , always ... human experience of passionate connection , to pause and search your own thoughts and experience as you consider the ...
Page 17
... experience and your own personal relationships - unfamiliar areas that you may never have really thought about ... human experience in love relationships , allowing each of us to come away with our own personal answer . -Margaret Black ...
... experience and your own personal relationships - unfamiliar areas that you may never have really thought about ... human experience in love relationships , allowing each of us to come away with our own personal answer . -Margaret Black ...
Page 22
... human being is not even " master in his own house " : we do not even run our ... experience is merely the tip of an immense iceberg of unconscious mental ... human sense of self - importance inflicted by each of these intellectual ...
... human being is not even " master in his own house " : we do not even run our ... experience is merely the tip of an immense iceberg of unconscious mental ... human sense of self - importance inflicted by each of these intellectual ...
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adult adventure aggression animal arousal became become bonobo central childhood commitment complex constructed contemporary culture dangerous degradation dependency ego psychology emerges emotional erotic excitement exploring fantasy feel felt Frans de Waal Fred Freud fundamental Hans Loewald Harold hate Heinz Kohut human experience human sexuality idealization illusion illusory imagination important inevitably infantile intense interpersonal intimacy Jake Jake's kind less lives love and desire lover M. C. Escher marriage mind motives narcissism nature object of desire oedipal omnipotent one's oneself ourselves pain parents partner pathos and guilt perpetually person perspective pity pleasure pornography powerful predictable psychic psychoanalysis psychology reality regarded rela relation Relational Psychoanalysis relationships requires response rience romance romantic love romantic passion seemed self-pity sense sexual social someone Stanley Crouch strange loop struggle surrender things tion traditional unconscious understand University Press vulnerability wife woman women York zipless fuck