There's the Worm that will gnaw at the heart, For the tax to a queen or a king, Hullabaloo ! There's Consumption to wither the weak, Hullahbaloo ! We may farm at a very high rent, Hullahbaloo ! Our acquaintance may cut us direct, We may not have a twig or a straw, Hullahbaloo ! Some are pallid with watching and want, Some have lost e'en a voice in the House; But they all will be able to sing Hullahbaloo ! Some are deep in the Slough of Despond, Hullahbaloo ! We may give up the struggle with Care, VOL. IX. Or with hearts breaking surely and slow But we all shall be able to sing Hullahbaloo ! Oh! no matter how wretched we be, There's a Music aloft in the air, Hullahbaloo ! As if Cherubs were humming a song, Now it's high, now it's low, here and there, While the steeples are loud in their joy, For we all should be able to sing Hullahbaloo! EPIGRAM ON THE ARRANGEMENT OF THE STATUES IN TRAFALGAR SQUARE IF Nelson looks down on a couple of Kings, 'Tis after the fashion of nautical things, A sky-scraper over the Royals. 115 THE REGULAR AND THE IRREGULAR DRAMA. A WRITER in the Times lately attributed the decline of the public taste for Theatrical Exhibitions to the superiority of the Dramatic Scenes, serious and comic, which are so admirably got up and performed daily in the Bankruptcy Courts, the Old Bailey, Guildhall, Westminster Hall, the Police Offices, the Courts of Conscience, and other Houses, major and minor, in London and the Provinces. And there is certainly some truth in the theory; for the snatches of Tragedy, Comedy, and Farce, furnished by such places, are much more interesting and amusing, and infinitely more instructive, than the pieces fabricated by most of our modern play-wrights. Some of the Judges and Counsel show quite as "fiery off" as any stars on the boards, and the Jurors, common or special, are quite as clever and entertaining as the walking gentleman. The want of music and dancing in the places alluded to, makes them less strong in Opera and the Ballet, and Her Majesty's Theatre, in the Haymarket, prospers accordingly, from the absence of competition. The Police offices, however, are powerful rivals to the Adelphi, Surrey, &c., in pieces of strong and sometimes very domestic interest, the plots of which are duly recorded in some of the daily prints and Melodrama flourishes at the Sessionshouse and in the inquest-room. Here and there a Coroner is also a very respectable performer in the funny line; and Constables, Beadles, and Bumpkin witnesses are capital low comedians. How far it might be practicable to retrieve the fortunes of the Patent Theatres, by allowing a certain portion of the public business to be transacted on the stage, is left for the Proprietors to discuss with the Lord Chamberlain ; nothing else, probably, will ever raise the shares of either to a profitable premium-for, who would pay to sit at their fictitious shows, when he might, gratis, see such exhibitions of real life elsewhere, and listen to the genuine dialogue of human nature? Here is a brief example : MISAPPREHENSION. A DRAMATIC SKETCH. SCENE. A Club Room at the Hare and Hounds. At the table sits the county Coroner with his Clerk. The Jurors are arranged round the board. The Constable, &c., fill the background. TIMOTHY GUBBINS, a Witness, is under examination. Cor. DID you know the defunct? Wit. Who's he? Cor. Why, the dead man. Wit. Yes. Cor. Intimately? Wit. Wery. Cor. How often have you been in company with him? Cor. And do you call that intimately? Wit. Yes-for he were wery drunk, and I were wery drunk -and that made us like two brothers. Cor. Who recognised the body? Wit. Jack Adams. Cor. How did he recognise him? Wit. By standing un on his head to let the water run out. Cor. I mean how did he know him? Wit. By his plush jacket. |