is imprudent in his choice he should be the more patient in bearing the punishment of his folly. When the ancient Egyptians, in their sacrifices of marriage, threw the bile of the victim under the altar, they meant to signify that there was no room for anger in the conjugal relation, in which kind affection should take the place of wrath, love of hatred, and human kindness of the gall of bitterness; in which the consorts should bear the common yoke with equal minds and accommodation to the manners of each other; in which, with all the energies of that charity which suffereth long and is kind, which is not easily provoked, which beareth all things and endureth all things, they should learn to be patient under the humours and infirmities of each other". If marriage was not, in nature and in law, permanent, if it was subject to the caprices of human passion, it would be the most unstable of all acquaintance: there would be no patience of the first offence and the apprehension of its consequences : the disappointed hope of pleasure or of profit in marriage would be followed by immediate separation; there would be no provision for the education of children; there would be no maintenance for the infirmities, and no imperceptible acquiescence in the humours, of declining age. It is the consideration. of the indissoluble permanence of the conjugal union which enforces the necessity of moulding the temper from the very beginning of matrimonial life, by uninterrupted converse and the most unwearied spirit of

9 Comber, Off. of Matr. partit. ii. sect. 2. s. 5. de Conjug. s. 448.

conciliation, that when the transports of passion have subsided, and the fascinating graces of early life have been impaired, there may still remain a disposition to mutual concessions; a ready acknowledgment of tried excellence, a cheerful forbearance and compassion of each under the infirmities of the other. It is an affecting scene, which is sometimes exhibited in the extremities of wedded life, when an aged couple, that have long borne the burthens of each other, are unable to contend with the last separation, and sink together into a common grave. It is a less mournful proof of virtuous constancy, which many have exhibited in imputing such obligation to their first love, as not to allow to themselves a liberty of entering upon a second marriage. The doctrine, notwithstanding its opposition to the permissive rule of the apostle, was commonly held in the primitive Church: and it has been carried also into the practice of savage life, without being restricted to the suttees of India. women of ancient Germany took an husband, as they took one body and one life, not suffering their thoughts or their desires any larger licence, and restraining their love, as it were, not to the husband, but the marriage: and it is recorded of the Winedi, who were in other respects a most savage race of men, that they were so zealous in observing the mutual love of marriage, that the woman refused to survive her husband, and that she was commended who committed suicide, that the body of herself and her husband might be burned upon a common pile'. There is a reciprocity in the duties of wedded

Tac. de Mor. Ger. s. 19. Brotier, Annot. ad loc.

The

life, dependent on the singleness of the union of the two into one flesh, which in practice should never be abated. It is not meant that the offences of the one will ever excuse the offences of the other, or that indifference or aversion, inconstancy or infidelity, can under any circumstances be worthy of pardon, or capable of defence. But when the conjugal duties are upon one side adequately discharged, a foundation is laid upon which the performance on the other part may be the more confidently demanded: and whenever they are neglected it is unreasonable to require the benefit which is not conferred. This is the ground of the doctrine of recrimination, under the most aggravated of offences, which operates not in the increase of crime, but in refutation of the plea of injury, and the pursuit of redress. If upon the one side there is constant affection and love, gentleness, modesty, rational compliance, respect, and reverence, the whole circle of a wife's duties to her husband, they form a ground upon which she may build her claim to protection, indulgence, honour, admiration, and all the virtues which a husband owes to his wife. But if the woman is loving and amiable, faithful and obedient to her husband, and in all quietness, sobriety, and peace, a follower of holy and godly matrons, what shame does she not accumulate upon the indifference, antipathy, and aversion, the fickleness and arbitrary tyranny of an unkind, an inconstant, and cruel husband,? What provocation does he not offer to her to retaliate and resent the injuries which she sustains? And what is the justice of his complaint, what is his title to redress, if she inflicts the evils which she receives;

if she makes him in his turn to feel, if he has the sense to feel," the worst of sorrow, and the worst of shame;" if she deprives him of benefits which his own conduct proves him unable to appreciate, and unworthy to possess? Or if the husband, in the punctual fulfilment of all his duties, meets with no return, or is incited by bad example to retaliate, can the woman complain, if she is neglected, insulted, abandoned, and despised? It is the excellent argument of Lactantius, that both should observe the pledge which they have severally given to each other, or rather, the wife should be taught a lesson of chastity by an example of continence. For it is unjust to demand of another what you yourself are not able to exhibit. This injustice has been the occasion of adultery, when women have been indignant in maintaining their fidelity to those who have been wanting in reciprocal affection: nor is there any woman so destitute of shame, as not to gloss over her vices with the pretence, that in her offence she does not commit, but only revenge, an injury. This is well expressed by Quintilian, when he says, that the man who does not abstain from the bed of another man is not the guardian of his own, for between these things there is a natural connexion. For the man who is engaged in debauching the wives of other men can have no leisure for preserving the sanctity of his own house; and the woman who falls into such a marriage is provoked by the example, and thinks how she may imitate her husband, or obtain redress for her wrongs. Caution is therefore necessary, that no occasion or pretext for vice may arise from our intemperance; that the manners of

the two may be accommodated by custom to each other; and that the yoke may be borne with equal minds. We should one in the other contemplate ourselves. For in this consists the sum of righteousness, in not doing to another what we are not willing that another should do unto us*.

The general rule of Christian duty is especially appropriate to the state of matrimony, in which no man can deviate from the straight path of reciprocal obligation, without injury to his own interest; without danger to his own honour; without disparagement of his own affections; without destruction of his best and most substantial happiness. In the practice of inconstancy and unconcern, he deprives himself of all title to consolation, to compassion, and to redress, if he suffers wrong: and although he respects not himself, nor the redemption of the vow of his marriage, although the claims of the wife of his covenant are undervalued or renounced, let him think upon his children, whose Christian and virtuous education, the secondary end of marriage, is defeated, when their parents live not together in godly love and honesty, and the full possession of that mutual society, help, and comfort, which it is the great purpose of matrimony to produce. It is the sentiment of an unknown and anonymous writer, which in this respect is worthy of more authority than is due to the general character of his writings, and in which he professes to deliver the substance of the apostle's doctrine on the duty of marriage: I have taught wives to love their husbands, and to

Lactant. Div. Inst. 1. vi. c. 23.