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MR. BULL. "I NEVER DOUBTED YOUR BRAVERY, MY STRONG FRIEND: WHAT I WANT IS MORE BRAINS ; SO, TO ENCOURAGE TAEM, I'LL GIVE YOU A WHOLE SHILLING A WEEK MORE!!!”
[N.B. This is the English of " Important Concessions in point of pay to the Metropolitan Police.”-See Morning Papers.
agreed to take. Until they had clutched the treasure in the GETTING BUTTER OUT OF A DOG'S MOUTH. streets of Cadiz, and were well on their way back to their haunts
with their money in their bags, no sign of force was made. Then, in a moment retribution fell on the guilty band, and they were nearly all slain, while a portion of the price of their villainy was recovered.”
“A portion ?” Yes, £700, out of £5000. Again we ask, where is the rest of the money ?
It seems that ŞIR RICHARD AIREY advanced the amount to MR. BONELL Senior out of the military chest at Gibraltar.
Let us hope, when our Government tries to get the money back from the Spanish it won't find its claim "an airy nothing." Possibly the BONELLS may be made to pay up. But the least probable solution, of all probable solutions, we will answer for it, is the one suggested the Times :
“We imagine that SIR RICHARD AIREY will demand the repayment of his loan from MR. LAYARD, and that MR. LAYARD will not be slow in recovering it from the Foreign Office at Madrid."
Punch has the greatest respect for MR. LAYARD, and a S we prophesied last week,—the Guardia Civile only found on the ments, but we fear, it will be beyond even MR. LAYARD'S
large faith in his power of dealing with uncivilised Governbrigands they killed £700 out of the £5000 ransom paid by the power, to make a Spanish Government stump up to the MESSRS. BONELL. What has become of the rest of the money ?
tune of £5000—witness the Tornado case. A Spanish GovAsk the Spanish Government. The Times draws a comparison between the comedy of Gibraltar or without forms of law-above all, it can rob—even its
ernment can bully-can bluster-can lie-can cheat, with and the recent tragedy in Greece. “Where,” it asks, is the keystone of the own robbers. But one thing it won't do-whether it can difference between the cases ?." It admits that much credit is due to the tact and or no-and that is pay its debts, above all to Englishmen. energy of MR. LAYARD, but the essential distinction is in " the promptitude of the It acts upon, whether or not it avows, the patriotic
reason, Spanish Government."
that it can't bear handing over the Spanish” to English “In Greece, and especially in the Greek Foreign Office, we found nothing but vacillation hands. at a period of the negotiations when firmness was required, and nothing but obstinacy when a temporising and conciliatory policy should have been pursued. In Spain it was quite otherwise. The brigands were tracked and watched from a distance. Their proceedings ASTRONOMERS are the Sun's "good-natured friends." were every one of them observed and known, without their being aware of the fact. They They are never tired of talking about him, and pointing were encouraged by negotiation to demand and even to grasp the ransom which they had ! out his black spots.
THE FARM AND THE SCHOOL,
SLEEP-DRIVING. Two poor diables of Essex carters were fined, the other day, for being asleep on their carts on the Bow Road.
The defence of the unhappy drivers deserves attention. It seems these men have no regular hours for sleep allowed them by their masters. In the day they work in the market-garden, or on the farm : at night they have to drive their carts up to London with the produce, and back. The only sleep they get, according to their own account, from Monday morning to Sunday night, is in the litter of the stable, or atop of the loads in their carts, or the manure they carry back in them.
How comes it that men submit to such conditions ? Are the Essex clodhoppers really so much duller than their neighbours, as to give two days' work for one day's wages ? Or, are the relations of labour and capital so distorted, that the master can really, in this case as in that of the London bakers, impose any hours and conditions of toil he pleases, on the poor wretches whom he employs ?
The case is worth looking into. We recommend it to MR. TREMENHEERE, who is always inquiring and making blue-books about somebody or something or other that is out of joint.
Sleep-walking only harms the somnambulist. But sleep-driving is apt to endanger the lives and limbs of passengers. We can't have the population of Bow run over ; but it seems hard to lay the carters of Essex under hours of Jabour which make it impossible for them to keep their eyes open. We recommend the East-End Magistrates, if the law allows them, to let off the men, and to bleed, instead, those Essex calves, their masters.
Mrs. Ramsbotham on Laws.
“Of course there is," returned Mrs. RAMSBOTHAM, who has been lately reading history," there's the Poor Law, and the Sumptuary Law; and quite right too."
GRINNING AND BEARING IT.
We all owe something to our country,” said the Briton who went
NEW DIVISION OF TIME." The Rest of the Week.” Sunday.
HYDE PARK IN ECLIPSE.
The concourse is less dense, the show less gay;
And Rotten Row shows symptoms of decay.
Timid, and touchy as the plant which feels,
Resort of threatening mobs convoked by BEALES P
But for awhile their sun disdains to shine,
O’er the bare bed of the dry Serpentine ?
If, during the work's progress, for a lark,
Evidently MR. DISRAELI forgot to introduce this salu-
" Aurora was in high spirits, amusing herself with a whip.
What are you doing, child ?” asked deorum pater, good-humouredly. He was always 'good-humoured when in his dressing-gown and slippers; he had just soaked a petit pain in chocolate.
Spinning the top of the morning,' answered the god. dess, archly. She had recently visited Ireland, and had brought away with her the slightest brogue in the world.
To the Styx wid the brogue,' she retorted on the Son of Ops remarking her accent--Don't you see I wear
sandals? NOTA BENE,
"Jupiter .. .. but at this moment Juno entered, and
Mercury followed with the morning paper.”
A PROVERB OF NO VALUE
In June, 1870.
“MAKE Hay while the Sun Shines.” Can't.
ANOTHER HAPPY THOUGHT.
SCENE-Mr. Punch's Library.'
Mr. Punch. Ain't you going to do something important for the new
Mr. P. Sounds well. Series ?
A. H. T. Oui, mein Herr.
to their gander of a husband; is clear that she can have one. and, though a little duck of the kind may daily share her grub with
Mr. P (sternly). Sir, you are Boompjeous. (Sweetly.) Take a cigar. him, it is first of all on the effort of the male that she depends for her support. I would recommend your scientific readers to pursue the analogy by paying an early visit to this interesting couple. I believe it
Probably Mediæval. will be found to be considerably more interesting than many interesting couples they may elsewhere meet. Yours obediently,
Two Templars were starting for the Continent. "Gramercy," quoth
the elder to the younger, “thy trunk is open, the string hath broke.”.
younger, in no sort discouraged, “'tis
Beshrew me! answered the elder, archly, “ 'twould be better
an 'twere recorded."
[And they went by the next train.
PEERS PECKING AT PEERS.
but a different sort of billing is natural to birds of no doubt originated the query to which we have satisfactorily replied. prey.
A.B.C. “ with a Difference," 218
Historical Manuscripts' Commission, 144
Horses and their Torturers, 168
Hyde Park in Eclipse, 258
Hymn to St. Trofimus, 13
ILL-USED Pappa (An), 89
Imperial Economy, 116
Emancipation, 157 Important Cabinet Revelation, 22 “Am I my Brother's Keeper?" 106
Imprecations on an Exclusive, 40
Fenian's Quick March from Canada, 241 Improvement on Furbelow, 104 Anchovies and Capers, 30
Clergyman who Keeps a Conscience (A), 7 Fenians' Raging Fury (The), 100 Infallible Out-and-Outer (The), 118
Involuntary Owls, 128
Io Paan! 147
Fine Feathers for Fine Birds, 157 Irish Treasonmonger to Himself (The), 135 Apology (An), 165 Columbus in the Calendar, 227 Fine Head of Humbug (A), 88
Irrepressible Sunday Bill (The), 93
Fine Times for Madame Tussaud, 220 Is Tight-Lacing Injurious ? 185
JOLLY Doctors (The), 8
First-Night and other Dramatic Criti- Jovial" Reading " Party (A), 209
Justice for Ireland ! 136
Justice for Justice, 140
Justice Holding her own, 124
KING Maw or Another, 189
LACONIC Reform in Parliament, 168
La Mode and La Misère, 77 Awkward Name (An), 13
Fish's Despatches, 4
Fountain of Honour in France, 176 Lay of Licensing Amendment, 90 Ayrtonus Exultans ! 207
Cramming at Home and at School, 3 “Fourth R” Question Composed (The), Leap of Quintus Curtius " (The), 188 BABOO Keshub Chunder Sen, 155 Crying Nuisance (A), 199
Learning for Ladies, S6 Ballad for Dawson Burns (A), 127 Cry of the Commoners (The), 168 Free and
Easy Versions of the Classics, 88 Le Mieux est l'Ennemi du Bien, 153 Barrel of Barrels (A), 155 “Cry of the Innocents” (The), 150 French Judicial Farce, 129
Lesson to Louis Blanc (A), 135
Lines to Dupanloup, 34
French Modistes and French Modesty, 171 Lisping in Numbers, 127
Listeners Hearing Good of themselves,
From “Our own Correspondent,” 73, 119 187 Betting Blackguard's Ballad (The), 169 Down with your Dust, 177
Literary Ice-Stacks, 137
Live Sea-Serpent (A), 175
Getting Butter out of a Dog's Mouth, 257 Long Step in the Right Road (A), 76
Look at the Clock, 86 Bishops to Make ! Bishops to Mendi 14 Durham Geese and Donkeys, 125
Give him a Stone, 196
Lords and Commons, 198 Blackheath and the Board of Works, 231 EARTH hath Bubbles as the Water has Gladstone at the Derby, 233
Loss to Ancient Nicholas (A), 238 Blank Verse, 129
Low Gamblers and the Better Orders, 196 Blessing on an Old Broome (A), 46 Echo Ecumenicalis, 113
Gracious Evans, and a Charming Dick MACBETH not Dogberry, 177
Whittington (A), 27
Madmen and their Murderers, 115 Braggarts and their Moneybags, 137 Eddication League (The), 72
Grave of Charles Dickens (The), 253 Manchester's Medical Charities, 115 Bright still Brighter, 24 Edwin to Angelina, 186
Great Anglo-Gallic Amalgamation Com- Man of April again (The), 44 British Blessing for India (A), 195 Effects of the Irish Land Bill, 78
pany (The), 19
Mark Lemon, 219 Bung and the Borough (The), 199 Egyptian Progress, 130
Great Meeting in the City, 167
Master hath Spoken (The), 199 'Bus-Driving and its Critics, 36 Eighty Miles at a Stretch, 76
Great Untaxed in Posse ? (The), 148 Matrimonial Qualification for M.P., 159 CAB of the Future (The), 160 En Voila bien Assez, 113 Groundless Panic, 186
Medical Police, 8 nadian Volunteers' Song (The), 234 Ermine in Sight of Spring (The), 43 Gush of Eloquence (A), 63
Mediumship, Home and Foreign, 149 Candidates for the Carnificate, 71 Euphemism before accuracy, 201 HANDY-Capping, 123
Minister of Great Horse-Power (A), 209 Capital Investment (A), 93 Evenings from Home, 32, 49, 105 Hard Work for Hoofs, 186
Ministries and Mobs, 54 Card Delivery Company Wanted (A), 187 Example to Greece (An), 249
Height of Just Taxation (The), 153 Misjudgment of Judges (The), 207 Cat and the Council (The), 61 Experiment on John Bull (An), 250 He is an Edile ! 208
Mission of the Mayors (The), 54 Chant to the Council (A), 65 Extra Law Lord (An), 22
High, Low, Broad, or Narrow? 208 Monasteries and Monasteries, 154 Charity and Cookery, 42 Faites votre jeu-Le jeu est fait ! 157 Hint for the Academy (A), 93
More Happy Thoughts, 1, 17, 28, 34, &c. Charity for Girls of Fashion (A), 211 Fal-lals for February, 62
Hints for Conversation (Derby Day), 230 More New Theatres ! 3