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It seems a story from the world of spirits
When any man obtains that which he merits,
Or any merits that which he obtains.

SECOND SPEAKER.

For shame, my friend!-renounce this idle strain !
What wouldst thou have a good great man obtain?
Wealth, title, dignity, a golden chain,

Or heap of corses which his sword hath slain?
Goodness and greatness are not means, but ends.
Hath he not always treasures, always friends,
The good great man? Three treasures,―love, and light,
And calm thoughts, equable as infant's breath;
And three fast friends, more sure than day or night, –
Himself, his Maker, and the Angel Death.

S. T. COLERIDGE. (1770-1834.)

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VAUNTED (au like a in far), pp., BUG'BEAR, n., an imaginary terror. boasted.

IR-RE-SPON'SI-BLE, a., not answerable

Do not say air for are (like r); govunment for gov'ern-ment; issoo for is'sue.

1. If we wholly perish with the body, what an imposture is this whole system of laws, manners and usages, on which human society is founded! If we wholly perish with the body, those maxims of charity, patience, justice, honor, gratitude and friendship, which sages have taught and good men have practiced, what are they but empty words, possessing no real and binding efficacy?

2. Why should we heed them, if in this life only we have hope? Speak not of duty. What can we owe to the dead, to the living, to ourselves, if all are, or will be, nothing? Who shall dictate our duty, if not our own pleasures, if not our own passions? Speak not of morality. It is a mere chimera, a bugbear of human invention, if the life of man terminates with the grave.

3. If we must wholly perish, what to us are the sweet ties of kindred? what the tender names of parent, child, sister, brother, husband, wife, or friend? The characters of a dra'ma are not more illusive! We have no ancestors, no descendants; since succession can not be predicated of nothingness. Would we honor the illustrious dead? How absurd to honor that which has no existence !

4. Would we take thought for posterity? How frivolous to concern ourselves for those whose end, like our own, must soon be annihilation! Have we made a promise? How can it bind nothing to nothing? Perjury is but a jest. The last injunctions of the dying, what sanctity have they, more than the last sound of a chord that is snapped, of an instru ment that is broken?

5. To sum up all: If we must wholly perish, then is obedience to the laws but an insensate servitude; rulers and magistrates are but the phantoms which popular imbecility has raised up; justice is an unwarrantable infringement upon the liberty of men,— an imposition, a usurpation; the law of marriage is a vain scruple; modesty, a prejudice; honor and probity, such stuff as dreams are made of; and the most heartless cruelties, the blackest crimes, are but the legiti mate sports of man's irresponsible nature!

6. Here is the issue to which the vaunted philosophy of unbelievers must inevitably lead! Here is

that social felicity, that sway of reason, that emancipation from error, of which they eternally prate, as the fruit of their doctrines! Accept those doctrines, and the whole world falls back into a frightful chaos; and all the relations of life are confounded; and all ideas of vice and virtue are reversed; and the most inviolable laws of society vanish; and all moral discipline is discredited.

7. Accept those doctrines, and the government of states and nations has no longer any cem'ent to uphold it; and all the harmony of the body politic becomes discord; and the human race is no more than an assemblage of reckless barbarians, shameless, remorseless, brutal, denaturalized, with no other law than force, no other check than passion, no other bond than irreligion, no other God than self. Such would be the world which impiety would make! Such would be this world, were a belief in God and immortality to die out of the human heart!

From the French of MASSILLON.

(1717-1742.

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EXERCISES IN LEVEL OR COLLOQUIAL DELIVERY.

COMPASS (kum'pass), n., space; an | VOY'AGE, n., a journey by sea.

instrument by which ships are steered.

CAN'VASS, v. i., to solicit votes.

PATTEN, n., a sort of shoe.

SUP'PLI-ANT, n., a humble petitioner.
FRIV'O-LOUS, a., slight; vain.

SURGEON, n., one who cures by the MO-MENT'OUS, a., important.

hand or by instruments.

EP'OCH (ep'ok or e'pok), n., era; date.

MA-RINE' (-reen), a., belonging to the sea.

The au in haunt has the sound of a in far. In gov'ern-or, in'ter-est, ex'er-cise, heed the sound of er; in town and count'er, the sound of ou.

1. THE DULL RAZOR. "Does this razor go easy?" asked a barber of his customer, who was writhing under a clumsy instrument, the chief recommendation of which was a strong handle. "Well," replied the

poor fellow, "that depends upon what you call this oper ation. If you're skinning me, the razor goes tolerably easy; but if you're shaving me, it goes rather hard." "Does n't it take hold?" asked the barber. “Yes, it takes hold, but it won't let go," replied the victim.

2. How To RUIN YOUR HEALTH. A humorous writer gives the following rules for ruining health: Stop in bed late. Eat hot suppers. Turn day into night, and night into day. Take no exercise. Always ride when you can walk. Never mind about wet feet. Have half a dozen doctors. Take all the medicine they give you. Try every new quack. If that doesn't kill you, quack yourself.

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3. CARRYING A JOKE TOO FAR. A fellow stole a saw, and on his trial told the judge that he only took it in joke. “How far did you carry it?" inquired the judge. —"Two miles," answered the prisoner.“ Ah ! that's carrying a joke too far!" said the judge; and the prisoner was sentenced to hard labor, in the House of Correction, for three months.

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4. Too OFFICIOUS. · "Your house is on fire!" exclaimed a stranger, rushing into the parlor of a pompous and formal citizen.-"Well, sir," replied the latter, "to what cause am I indebted for the extraordinary interest which you seem to take in the affairs of my house?"

5. MAKING THE BEST OF THINGS. "I have told you," says Southey, "of the Spaniard who always put on spectacles when about to eat cherries, in order that the fruit might look larger and more tempting. In like manner I make the most of my enjoyments; and though I do not cast my eyes away from my troubles, I pack them in as small a compass as I can for myself, and never let them annoy others."

6. FATE OF IDLERS. The man who did not think it was respectable to bring up his children to work

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has just heard from his three sons. driver on a canal; another has been taken up as a vagrant; and the third has gone to a certain public institution, to learn to hammer stone, under a keeper. 7. REBUKING ARROGANCE. When Abernethy was canvassing for the office of surgeon to St. Bartholomew Hospital, in London, he called upon a rich grocer, one of the governors. The great man behind the counter, seeing the poor surgeon enter, immediately assumed the grand air toward the supposed suppliant for his vote, and said: "I presume, sir, you want my vote and interest at this momentous epoch of your life." Abernethy, who hated humbugs, and felt nettled at the tone, replied, "No, I don't; I want a pennyworth of figs. Come, look sharp, and wrap them up; I want to be off!"

8. OPPOSITION TO REFORM.-"I do not mean," said the Rev. Sydney Smith, at a meeting on the Reform Bill,-"I do not mean to be disrespectful; but the attempt of the Lords to stop the progress of reform, reminds me very forcibly of the great storm of Sidmouth, and of the conduct of the excellent Mrs. Partington on that occasion. In the winter of 1824, there set in a great flood upon that town; the tide rose to an incredible height; the waves rushed in upon the houses, and every thing was threatened with destruction.

"In the midst of this sublime and terrible storm, Dame Partington, who lived upon the beach, was seen at the door of her house, with mop and pattens, trundling the mop, squeezing out the sea-water, and vigorously pushing away the Atlantic Ocean. The Atlantic was roused. Mrs. Partington's spirit was up; but I need not tell you that the contest was unequal. The Atlantic Ocean beat Mrs. Partington. She was excellent at a slop or a puddle, but she should not have

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