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“ A graver orator, Sir, would better be- Hart-rooted rancor, envy borne in hell, come so great an action, as to welcome our Did long in long antipathie detaine, great and most gratious soveraine; and a To either's ruine, as they both can tell, bashfull silence were a boye's best elo. Uniting them, thou hast enlarged thy quence. But seeing wee read, that in the throne, salutations of that Romane Cæsar, a sillie And maid devyded Albion all bee one." pye, amongst the rest, cried, Ave Cæsar, to: Pardon mee, Sir, your M. owne old

At Sanquhar, and Drumlanrig, his parret

, to put furth a few words, as witnes- Majesty was also greeted in Latin ses of the fervent affections of your most poems; and, returning by Dumfries faithfull subjects in these parts, who all by to his English dominions, Mr James my tongue, as birds of one cage, crye with Halyday, in the name of the town, mee, Ave Cæsar, Welcome most gratious scattered the flowers of rhetoric on the Kinge."

King's head, with a most lavish hand. When Master Williame had made To the “Muses Welcome to King an end of speaking, another good thou- James, on his return to Scotland,” are sand hexameters were produced in the appended the “Planctus, et Vota Mushape of a Carmen Panegyricum. sarum in Augustissimi Monarchæ Jan

At Hamilton, Sir William Mure, cobi, Magne Britanniæ, Franciæ, et younger of Rowallan, presented a copy Hiberniæ Regis, &c. Recessu è Scotia of English verses, which, in despite of in Angliam, Augusti 4, Anno 1617, their quaintness and classical afecta- Ως ευκόλως πιπίεσιν αι λαμπραι τυχοι ! tion, (which, it would appear, were Edinburgi, Excudebat Andreas Hart, characteristic of the times,) possess no Anno 1618.” It is a collection of Lamean degree of poetical merit. We tin poems, equally honourable to the quote the following stanzas as a speci- loyal feelings, and to the erudition of

our ancestors, but of which our limits * Great James, whose hand a thre-fold preclude us from exhibiting any spesæpter swayes,

cimen. By heavens exalted to so high a place, But we must make an end. What Both crown'd with gold and never-fading we have said and quoted is sufficient bayes,

to convince our cotemporaries, both Who keps three kingdoms in so still a

here and in Dublin, that it may be as peace ; Whose love, cair, wisdome, grace, and difficult to imitate the expressions of high deserts,

the loyalty of King James's time, as it Have maid thee monarch of thy subjects' was at the Coronation of George IV., harts.

to find patterns for the dresses of that “ Thogh thou by armes great empyrs age. may'st surprise,

When his Majesty visits Scotland, Mak Europe thrall, and over Asia reigne, we shall be quite content if the memoYet at thy feet, despysed, Bellona lyes : rials which will probably be compiled No crownes thou craves which bloody con. of the event, convey to posterity spe

queis stain. While others aim at greatness boght with the taste, and learning, not only of the

cimens, as honourable, of the genius, blood, Not to bee great thou stryves, bot to bee other civil citizens, as the curious and

universities, but of the merchants, and good. “ Whome snakie hatred, soul-conceiv'd amusing volume to which we have redisdaine,




We are really the only samples of wit agenary decay. 'Tis a foul aspersion : extant, since poor Sheridan departed, We have grown old and Canning's Hyppocrene's grown

" In jokes, not years, somewhat drowthy ; but mighty as our powers may be, we cannot pro

Piercing the depths of fun.” fess to keep the world laughing for If we be wrinkled, 'tis not from age, ever without some assistance. Our but risibility. There are two deep teeth have lost their original whiteness. trenches (almost) cut in our visage from being too much exposed from “from mouth to either ear,"all through over-grinning ; though some will have one simple gentleman—the King of the this to be the due consequences of sex- Cockneys; and the other inhabitants of that smoky land have all left their you, when we do give you, or any set marks in our features. We can stand of you, a box on the ear, to think noit no longer, for they grow more ridic thing of it. Suppose us over our third culous, and we more witty every day. bottle at Oman's, acting the editor over Therefore, we intend, for the future, his mahogany, argufying for the bare laughing by proxy; and if the gene life, (the more the nonsense, the greattle reader know of a wide-mouthed, er the spunk, as the Adjutant says,) shrewd, idle fellow of an acquaintance, and putting forth our gouty foot forelet him be shipped instantaneously in most to shew our magnanimity. the City of Edinburgh Steam-Boat, un- We are at this moment deeply ender cover, to Christopher North, Esq. gaged in a dispute, (we have in full He shall be grinner-general of Auld perfection that female faculty of wriReekie, and fugleman to the whole ting and speaking at the same time) world. For when Christopher or his about the superior intellectuality of the deputy laughs, who shall be grave ? profession. Our opponent waxes an

But seriously, the world is growing gry, (a general trick of our opponents) sery dull. There is not a joke stirring. and has fung at our head Burke's pica Even the two giant wits of the sister ture of Grenville, and his eulogium on isle, Norbury and O'Doherty, have be- bar-education. “ Bar that !” exclaim come chap-foundered. The Ensign has we. This was too much ;--the superlost all his powers, since he forswore excellent pun upset him, like a Conwhisky, and grew good. And his bro- greve rocket; and so pleased are we ther-wit has been taken with what the with the victory, and the instrument sages of Stephen's Green denominate of it, that we intend shipping a cargo the teasy weasy. The Irish bar has so of our worst and most spareable puns much changed for the worse, that on board the next whaler, that we may Charles Philipps himself has betaken vie with Sir William, and “ leap mast his youth and eloquence to Westmin- high” at contributing to the slaughter ster, and English jurors have been late- of the monsters of the deep. ly so bepreached out of bullism by But independent of this ruse, we had him, as to give upwards of sixpence da- the best of the argument. We mainmages for a broken head. To be sure, tained, that with respect to the subject the Templars plead very justly in de matter of study, the professions could fence of their dullness, that they laugh not be compared. As to heresies, what too much over Blackwood, and have so contemptible as Whiggism? With not leisure for original wit. They may many more sage proofs and vinous reamean this as a compliment, but we soning, till we came to issue upon wit don't take it as such. We reckon up- and humour, and the tendency of the on such ascendancy as a matter of different modes of life to produce it. course, and entreat our worthy young The advocate for the pre-eminence of friends, in return, not to be cast down medical wit overpowered us at first by the excellence of what they can ne- with a large catalogue of names we had ver come in competition with ; and never heard of-wicked wags of decaywarn them, what a reproach it is to be ed magazines and provincial towns, grave with such ridiculous personages cocked up before 'em, as Lawyer Scar

“ Now breaking a jest, and now setting a

bone." lett, and Attorney Brougham.

Physic is no better than law, and has He was marvellously obstreperous-we grown as stupid as an inauguration es- heard him out-and turned him out; say. From the top to the bottom of then fell to ourselves, tooth and nailthe profession—from Sir Henry Hal. surplice against long robe. We came ford, down to Gale Jones and Dr at last to something like a compromise, Drumgoole, it is stale, flat, unprof- allowing supereminence to the law in No; not always unprofitable. But for stray jests and Joe Millerisms, while, the church to acquiesce in the general in supporting a continuous and original torpor--the profession of Sterne and vein of humour, we maintained the Swift-it is a bad sign ;“ there's some- superiour vis comica of divinity, and thing rotten in the state of Denmark.” clinched our proof by an overwhelm

You know us, my worthy public, for ing lot of names, for any of which we a fellow of open arms. We love you all, were not much indebted to the present as in duty bound, by the laws of reci- age. Our divines, however learned, procal affection; and therefore beg of sage, and exemplary they may be, are VOL. X.




sadly deficient in fun, and have no the anachronisms of his biographers, longer the humour they used to have. the negligence of his editors, and the This change may be for the better, we malice of his enemies; and thrown hope so, considering it was ourselves that light upon his real charaeter, of who had the chief hand in producing which he has been so long and so unit. We have out-witted the whole justly deprived. Mr Octavius Gilworld, and there is no use in attempt. christ, who last edited this reverend ing humour, if it be not equal to Black- poetbut we must not weigh down wood, which is “a moral impossible." our buoyant publication with squabbles Therefore we are not surprised at the about editors and editions. To mal clerics having degenerated in this qua- a long story short, Dr Corbet, afterlity from their predecessors, and we wards Bishop of Norwich, was present fear there is no hope of seeing a hu- in Windsor, not at a coronation feast, morous account of the coronation feast but something very like it, seemingly issue from the bench of Bishops. It an installation of the Garter, about was otherwise of old, as thou shalt two hundred years ago, and has left a know, my public, when you come to humorous account of it in a poetic

epistle to the Lord Mordaunt. Our We trust, that we have thus far sa- readers may judge for themselves, what tisfactorily illustrated the genius and little alteration two centuries have writings of Bishop Corbet,--proved made in royal feasts and beef-eaters.

« To this good sport rode I, as being allow'd
To see the King, and cry him in the crowd,
And at all solemn meetings have the grace

To thrust, and to be trode on by my place."
The Bishop proceeds: he must have made a slight mistake of Windsor for
Westminster, and of the 17th for the 19th century.

“ Imagine now the scene lies in the Hall,
(For at high noon we are recusants all,)
The church is empty as the bellies were
Of the spectators that had languished there ;
And now the favourites of the Clerk o' the Check,
Who oft had groan'd, and stretch'd out many a neck,
'Twixt morn and evening, the dull feeders on
Patience and the Raysins of the Sun;
They who lived in the Hall five hours at least,
As if 'twere an arraignment, not a feast;
And look so like the hangings they stand near,
None could discern which the true pictures were;
These now shall be refreshed; whiles the bold drum
Strikes up his frolic, through the Hall they come,” &c.
“ So to the Hall made 1, with little care
To praise the dishes, or to taste the fare;
Much less t'endanger the least tart or pye
By any waiter there stolen and set by;
But to compute the value of the meat,
Which was for glory, not for hunger eat;
Nor did I fear Štand back! who pass'd before
The Presence, or the Privy-chamber door ;
But woe is me, the guard, (those men of war,
But two weapons do use, beef and the bar,)
Began to gripe me, knowing not in truth
That I had sung John Dory in my youth,
Or that I knew the day that I could chaunt
Chivie, and Arthur, or the Siege of Gaunt ;
And though these be the virtues which must try
Who is most worthy of their courtesy,
They profited me nothing, or no notes
Will move them, now they're deaf in their new couts ;

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Wherefore on run I, afresh they fall, and show
Themselves more active than before, as though
They had some wager laid, and did contend
Who should abuse me furthest at arms-end:
One I remember with a grizled beard,
And better grown than any of the herd," &c.
“ This Ironsides takes hold, and suddenly
Hurls me, by judgment of the standers by,
Some twelve foot by the square ; takes me again,
Out-throws half a bar; and thus we twain
At this hot exercise an hour had spent,
He the fierce agent, I the instrument:
My man began to rage, but I cry'd, Peace,
When he is dry or hungry, he will cease;
Peace for the Lord's sake, Nicholas, lest they take us,
And use as worse than Hercules did Cacus.'

And now I breathe, my lord, and have the time
To tell the causes, and confess the crime ;
I was in black-a scholar straight they guess'd:
Indeed I colour'd for it; at the least,
I spake them fair, desired to see the Hall,

'em reasons for it, this was all:
By which I learn, it is a main offence,
So near the Clerk o'the Check to utter sense," &c.
* Much more good service was committed yet,
Which I in such a tumult must forget ;
But shall I smother that prodigious fit,
Which past in clear invention and pure wit ?
As thus, a nimble knave, though somewhat fat,
Strikes on my head, and fairly steals my hat.
Another breaks a jest, yet 'twas not much,
Although the clamour and applause were such,
As when Sir Archy, or Garrat, doth provoke 'em.
And with wide laughter and a cheat-loaf choak 'em,
What was the jest, d'ye ask? I dare repeat it,
And put it home before ye shall entreat it ;
He call’d me Bloxford-man; confess I must,
'Twas bitter; and it grieved me in a thrust,
That most ingrateful word Bloxford to hear
From him whose breath yet stunk of Oxford beer.
But let it pass, for I have now pass'd through
Their halberds, (and worse weapons,) their teeth, too,
And of a worthy officer was invited
To dine, who all their rudness hath requited,” &c.

And gave

“ But as it stands, the persons and the cause
Consider'd all, my manners and their laws,
'Tis no affliction to ine, for even thus
St Paul hath fought with beasts at Ephesus,
And I at Windsor ; let this comfort then
Rest with all able and deserving men :
He that will please the guard, and not provoke
Court-wits, must sell his learning, buy a cloak :
* For at all feasts and masques the doom hath been,

A man thrust forth, and a gay cloak let in.'" The author of “ The Specimens of British Poets," has summarily given the merits of this author, saying merely, “ that he has left some good strokes of humour against the Puritans.” In our opinion, the only bad things he has left, are those little ballads against the Puritans; the wittiest of his poems, his Journey to France, quoted by that author of the Specimen, is a satire on the Roman Cathohcs, which, as it has appeared there,'we need not give. The “ Iter Borealeabounds in humour. Inns, hosts, and hostess, have always been fruitful sources of merriment to travelling wits.

“ To the inn we came, where our best cheer
Was that his Grace of York had lodged there.
He was objected to us when we call,
Or dislike aught, my lord's grace answers all ;
He was contented with this bed, this diet,
This keeps our discontented stomaclis quiet," &c.
“ The shot was easy, and what concerns us more,
The way was so, mine host did ride before ;
Mine host was full of ale and history;
And on the morrow, when he brought us nigh
Where the two * Roses join'd, you would suppose,
Chaucer ne'er writ the Romant of the Rose.
Hear him-See ye yond' woods ? there Richard lay
With his whole army; look the other way,
And lo, where Richmond, in a bed of gorse,
Incamp'd himself o’er night with all his force-
Upon this hill they met.' Why, he could tell
The inch where Richmond stood, where Richard fell ;
Besides, what of his knowledge he could say,
He had authentic notice from the play;
Which I might guess by's mustering up the ghosts,
And policies, not incident to hosts ;
But chiefly by that one perspicuous thing
When he mistook a player for a king;
For when he would have said, King Richard died,
And call’d a horse, a horse, he Burbage cried.
Howe'er, his talk, his company pleas'd well,
His mare went truer than his chronicle ;
And even for conscience-sake, unspurr’d, unbeaten,

Brought us six miles, and turn'd tail to Nun-Eaton." He proceeds to Warwick, apropos to which reverend place, we may make mention of sundry complaints received by us from thence, of some cockneys, who visited it about two months ago in a one-horse chay, and spoiled the trees in the greenery, by engraving on them Arry and Mariar, and plucking laurels, for what end we dare not conjecture. But to our Bishop.

“ No other hindrance now, but we may pass
Clear to our Inn;-Oh! there an hostess was,
To whom the castle and the dun cow are
Sights after dinner, she is morning ware ;
Her whole behavionr borrow'd was and mixt,
Half-fool, half-puppet, and her pace betwixt
Measure and jigge; her court’sie was an honour,
Her gait as if her neighbours had out-gone her.
She was barr'd up in whalebone, that did leese
None of the whales' length, for they reach'd her knees;
Off with her head, and then she hath a middle,
As her waste stands just like the new-found fiddle,
The favourite Theorbo, truth to tell ye,
Whose neck and throat are deeper than the belly.
Have you seen monkeys chain'd about the loins,
Or pottle-pots with rings ? just so she joins
Herself together; a dressing she doth love,
In a small print below, and text above." &c.

• Bosworth Field.

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