A MISSION FOR A MARQUIS. A MOST pathetic story appeared in the Times of Friday; a story of an English lady, a prisoner in Russia, the captive's age being only 82. She has passed very many years of her life in Russia as a governess. When the war broke out, this terrible Amazon of more than fourscore years, was denounced as an enemy to the Emperor." Who knows? She might some day have run him through with a Whitechapel needle; or "brained him with her fan! It was needful, therefore, to the daily safety and the unbroken sleep of the Emperor, that MRS. MARY RICHARDSON should be expelled the noble house where, in acknowledgment of her instructive services, she had long resided, and where it was promised her she might end her quiet days. A Russian General GENERAL GRESSER -had orders to drive out the enemy, MARY RICHARDSON, from her stronghold in a Russian princess's palace: and the General fulfilled the Imperial command with all that vigour and promptitude for which Russian Generals are, and ever will be distinguished. Since August last, MARY RICHARDSON has vainly sought for a conveyance to England: all such means have been Imperially denied her. For she is only 82, and might bring away all the models of all Russian fortifications in her work-box. The blight of the Imperial suspicion was upon her, and as a consequence "All her cordial friends and affectionate pupils closed their doors against her as rigidly as if she had been smitten with the plague, and she must inevitably have perished of cold and starvation in the streets or roads, had she not found an asylum in the house of a compatriot, whose interests detained him in the country." Sad is the fate of MARY RICHARDSON; nevertheless we think we espy sudden aid, immediate championship. The friendship existing between NICHOLAS the Emperor, and CLANRICARDE the Marquis, is now acknowledged, a bright historic fact. NICHOLAS showed himself "a truly great man,' -as at the time gratefully acknowledged-when he exchanged LORD DUNKELLIN, the Marquis's son, against a mere Russian Captain. Father and heir both, in words of memorable gratitude, acknowledged the greatness of that act. Well, we now propose to the MARQUIS OF CLANRICARDE that he should immediately depart for St. Petersburgh, in order to beg of his friend the Emperor, the freedom of MRS. MARY RICHARDSON, aged 82. That truly great man could hardly refuse so small a favour to his friend and old ambassador; whilst the mere pleasure of doing good, would be to the MARQUIS OF CLANRICARDE his own exceeding great reward. Does the reader ask, wherefore we select the MARQUIS OF CLANRICARDE for this most humane, most chivalrous mission? Truly, then, we read his fitness for it in the evidence of the late HANDCOCK case, laid bare in the Irish Court of Chancery. Who, in fact, can peruse the many testimonials to the care and attention that the MARQUIS OF CLANRICARDE paid to the wife (and subsequently, widow) of his friend, HANDCOCK,-the dear friend "with whom he had often enjoyed field-sports,"-the solicitude that he lavished on the dying-off daughters, the MISSES HANDCOCK,-who can read all this, and after reading the case of MRS. MARY RICHARDSON,-without instinctively jumping to the conclusion that the man of men to work the liberation of the aged Lady, is JOHN, MARQUIS OF CLANRICARDE? His existing friendship with the Emperor must we think render him an able advocate, whilst his chivalrous protection of widows and orphans, as now registered "in the books" confirms the thought into conviction. We shall be happy to give the earliest notice of the noble Marquis's departure. Bon voyage! THE COLONEL'S COALS. WE learn from the Stamford Mercury that COLONEL SIBTHORP's charity peculiarly glows in coals. His benevolence never burns so brightly as when stirred by a poker. Even in the COLONEL's ashes live his wonted virtues. His measure of political service is always a coal measure. Thus: "To those who gave the Colonel one vote a certain quantity of coals was given; to those who gave a plumper, double that quantity; and freemen and electors who had not voted for the Colonel, and who applied for coals, were refused." CLEAR THE SHIP! How they race, and roar, and fight; Stem on to the rocks she's driving, Masts are rending, sails are riving, GOD be with all souls aboard her! No; not yet all hope forswearing- Upward shoots the blue light flaring, By the lurid blaze, On a gilded soroll, fair written, Wreathed about with bays. Over her bulwarks fiercely leaping, Where are they should watch be keeping? All too late their fatal error, Birth-right pilots-'tis the hour Common hands, come clear the deck, Let the anchors run! Then, cheerily, oh! with a yeo heave, oh! Though she roll till her yard-arms dip. A FAST Young Lady writes to complain that her papa is always in such a hurry to come The COLONEL having so long bestowed coals upon Lincoln, how can that independent away (we almost fear she writes cut away, but Cathedral city ever dream of requiting the COLONEL with the sack? "THE STRANGER IN PARLIAMENT."-The People. give her the benefit of her illegibility) from a "OH! HERE'S A JOLLY SLEDGE." ABERDEEN AND HUMILIATION. LORD ABERDEEN has no objection to the appointment of a day of Humiliation for our defeats and disgraces in the war. How very good of him! When the prayers of a Kew congregation were requested for a certain sick man, it is on record that the old DUKE of CAMBRIDGE confidentially observed to himself and all about him, "no objection-no objection." But what will LORD ABERDEEN do to show a pious, instructed nation that, as far as humiliation goes, his heart is in the good work? Will he wear a suit of sackcloth? Or better, will he wear a court suit in his parish church, altogether heedless of the thermometer, a court suit of Russian towelling; with, of course the rewardful blue riband about his patriotic bosom, the garter around his knightly leg? No: we would not have our late beloved Premier so attired. We love a Lord; we love him-like England, with "all his faults," we love him still. And with good reason. For when the hour arrives that the heart of the bold Briton fails, instinctively, to go upon its knees at the sight of the Peerage-that day England is doomed as a nation. The hour when we-the national mob-cease to consider ourselves the political property of, say, some dozen familiesthat hour will ring the knell of Great Britain. The British Lion will be of no more account than a dead dog in the highway; hardly worth the skinning. Therefore, however the country may be humiliated, let there be no outward humiliation for LORD ABERDEEN, and the like of him. But this small acknowledgment in his heart we must suggest; and we do it the more readily, inasmuch in that we believe it will be most readily complied with by his Lordship. Whenever the day of Humiliation shall be appointed, there will, of course, be a gathering at the church doors in aid of the sufferers by the war. Now what we suggest is, that the EARL OF ABERDEEN takes with him the amount of the salary he has received as Prime Minister; and, as a penitential offering, that he there and then lays the cheque for the few thousands of pounds humbly and devoutly in the plate. This small act of reparation his Lordship will be only too happy-unless we much mistake him-to comply with. "My objection was not to a day of Humiliation, but to the appointment of a prayer for common use.' Thus spake LORD ABERDEEN in the House of Lords; and he had good reason for his objection to a prayer for common use: seeing that when his term of Premiership would end and determine, there would be the less necessity for a continued prayer against the causes of humiliation. The Noble Lord, however, is most ready to join in a special purpose of prayer, and this readiness reminds us of the old joke-book piety of the Mawworm greengrocer. Mawworm speaks from his back-parlour to the errand-boy in the shop. LORD JOHN'S TRAVELLING EXPENSES. COLONEL SIBTHORP has expressed a hope that as the country will have to pay LORD JOHN RUSSELL'S travelling expenses to Vienna, the expenses in question will not be heavy." While we concur in the gallant Colonel's hope, we trust that LORD JOHN will not feel himself bound to do the thing shabbily; to cut down the waiters at the hotels; to squabble about the price of his room, and to go to a second or third-rate restaurant for his dinner. We should be sorry to hear that his Lordship had been seen carrying his carpet-bag from the rail to the hotel, or walking down to the boat to save the cost of the 'bus, rather than add to the demand he will have to make on the public purse for the expenses of his journey. We must appeal to COLONEL SIBTHORP'S regard for the national character, and entreat him not to ask questions which will give foreigners the idea of our national stinginess. We hope we shall not find the Notice paper crowded with such questions as "Whether LORD JOHN RUSSELL was instructed to procure a through ticket to Paris?" or, "Whether any hints were given to the Noble Lord as to the charge for wax-lights at the hotels on the Continent ?" Mawworm. Have you sanded the sugar? Boy. Yes. Mawworm. Have you mixed the sloe-leaves with the tea?! Mawworm. Have you watered the small beer? Mawworm. Then shut up the shop, and come in to prayers. How well, how faithfully Lord Aberdeen, as Minister, follows the doings of the greengrocer! His lordship thus questions his subordinate colleagues. Minister. Have you neglected the Ordnance? Minister. Have you also taken little heed of bedding for the sick, and medicine for the wounded? Mrs. Jermes Graham (a Housekeeper). "REALLY, SIR, THIS INQUIRY' IS SO VERY INCONVENIENT THAT WE SHOULD LIKE TO LEAVE AT ONCE." GRINDOFF MILLER FROZEN-OUT LAWYERS. E fear the continuance of cold weather A scene that happened last week at A FIELD MARSHAL FOR THE CHURCH (To the Houses of Lords and Commons.) MY LORDS AND GENTLEMEN, IN the House whose members, my Lords, call yours "another place," never mentioning it directly to each other's ears polite;" in your House, Gentlemen: COLONEL KNOX is reported to have said in the debate on the Army Estimates : "The whole of the observations of the honourable Member for Lambeth resolved themselves into a tirade against PRINCE ALBERT. Now, really, the honourable gentleman should learn his lesson a little better, for he had made a gross mistake. The honourable Member had asked why his Royal Highness should be allowed £2,200 a year when other Colonels were allowed only £1,100. If the honourable gentleman find that the increase was a perfectly just one, and that he had no right to make the would look at the number of battalions commanded by his Royal Highness, he would remarks he had against that distinguished personage." His the Court of Common Pleas in London, before the LORD CHIEF JUSTICE JERVIS and a shivering jury, was suggestive rather of the Arctic Regions than of a British Tribunal, though it must be confessed that the idea of a Court of Just-ice was very painfully realised. Soon after the sitting of the Surely, my Lords and Gentlemen, the gallant COLONEL defends the Court, it was found that a ventilating illustrious PRINCE on another than the right ground. Not the comapparatus, which had been set up at mand of battalions, but the maintenance of the Prince-Consortship, some expense, refused to make itself is the proper plea for his ROYAL HIGHNESS's £2,200 annuity-and a "chose in action," for it would not who is he that expects PRINCE ALBERT to do his dignity for his clothes work, and accordingly no warm air and his victuals, and a few shillings a week? But is it not your Lordwas admitted. Upon this discovery ships' opinion, and yours, Gentlemen, that it would be better to give being made the following scene was the PRINCE £2,200 stipend for what he does, than for what he cannot enacted, according to the reports do; for value received, in preference to value irreceivable? in the papers of the twenty-second: ROYAL HIGHNESS cannot discharge the functions of a COLONEL-a "MR. SERJEANT BYLES said he had already been out to complain, for it was so cold chief of warriors. You will not permit him to go to the wars, very that the bar were really in a dangerous position. properly. Of course it would never do to have the husband of our QUEEN returning from the field of glory in a cask of rum, or curtailed, by the loss of an arm or a leg, of his fair proportions. He, doubtless, would be too glad to go, and be instrumental in scattering the enemies of his August Lady. But you won't let him. Allow me, then, my Lords and Gentlemen, to suggest to you that you have made him a dummy Field-Marshal-a Twelfth-Cake mounted officer: you might as well set him on a hobby in uniform, with a tin sword. And who do you think would feel comfortable in such a position? A ribald jester, perhaps a buffoon, a zany, a fellow who does not mind what he wears, or how ridiculous he looks. I think I know one who would ride a-cock-horse complacently enough in trappings more ludicrous, because more incongruous than motley and a fool's cap, if you would give him £2,200 per annum. That personage might not mind prancing away as a non-combatant COLONEL. But though I might not object to this kind of horsemanship, on those terms, I am certain, my Lords and Gentlemen, it cannot be a pleasant exercise for PRINCE ALBERT. The PRINCE, your Lordships and your Honours, wants real work to do. He has endeavoured to distinguish himself in the Army, according to his ability, within the scope which you allowed him. He has been active in the capacity of a clothing Colonel: but that is a tailor's and a hatter's business, and the genius of his ROYAL HIGHNESS is above that of the goose. He succeeded a great deal better in the wholesale concern of Industry in Hyde Park. "A juryman asserted that his feet were like ice. It will be seen from the above extract that the Court was positively shivered to pieces; for in consequence of the cold it was for a time broken up. The LORD CHIEF JUSTICE had, it seems, been sitting with his hands in his pockets; but the lawyers, though they had all no doubt got their hands in the pockets of their clients, were unable to keep themselves warm. We are quite of the same opinion with his Lordship as to the probability that "if the Aldermen were dining any; where, they would take care to have the place warm enough," and indeed we only wonder that the CHIEF JUSTICE was able to speak with as much coolness as he did on a subject with respect to which the warmest condemnation would have been justified. If even the Judge, who has the benefit of the judicial ermine, could not endure the low temperature, what must have been the feelings of poor DUNUP in his threadbare stuff gown and well worn paletot beneath? If, my Lords and Gentlemen, PRINCE ALBERT has any leisure which Your most obedient, and most humble Servant, Feb. 1855, 85, Fleet Street. Caution for the King of Prussia. O FREDERICK WILLIAM! mind your P's and Q's; |