THE MILITARY MARKET. (From our Horse Guards' Correspondent.) MORE PLAGUES THAN PROPHETS. A LEARNED doctor has lately come forward, claiming the merit of having foretold the death of the EMPEROR OF RUSSIA. HERE has not been such a heavy sensibly attacked the prices at Our old friend FRANCIS MOORE, Physician, insists that DR. GRANthe Horse Guards, and, there's VILLE is not the only M.D. who foretold the death of the CZAR; and no denying it, created half a one of the seers professes to have seen so far in advance, that he panic. The cousequence has been points to his almanack for 1843, wherein it is said, "Let the Russian that Governors' pockets have Autocrat prepare for his destiny!" which it is urged, was a distinct been excessively tight for the last prophecy of the event that has happened. It is true that the predicfortnight. Aunts and Mothers, tion was somewhat early, or, rather, its fulfilment has been a little late; also, have been unusually close, but the prophet calls attention to the fact that he had advised the CZAR and younger sons, belonging to to "prepare for his destiny;" and that twelve years would not be more some of our richest houses, are than sufficient for such a preparation. now walking about town absoDR. GRANVILLE complains, that though he gave LORD PALMERSTON lutely in want of a purchase, and the benefit of his prediction, his Lordship did not act upon it; but they cannot get one. A few that the Government went on just as if the Doctor had made 110 Cornets were done in May Fair prophecy whatever. We can hardly blame a minister for omitting to as low as £410 each, but in act on a prediction, however respectable the source whence it may "crack" regiments it is some consolation to know they fetched a proceed, for it would be impossible to draw the line; and if the pony or two more. The Light Buffs still maintained their figure, vessel of the nation were to be steered according to the second sight but the Heavy Greens, formerly in such demand in Belgravia, were of anyone professing to possess the gift, we should find all the almanack quoted as being "the lowest of the low; no one-not even trades- makers in the kingdom urging their prophecies on the attention of men's sons-would have anything to do with them. There was a Downing Street. Considering, moreover, that the prophets are usually slight advance in Household Troops, and towards the afternoon very loose in their language, there might be some difficulty in knowing there was a rumour in the best informed Clubs that a Captain precisely what to do; for if we were a Premier we should be a good in the Guards (Black) had positively been going a-begging for as deal puzzled to know how to proceed on the prophetic information, small a sum as £800; a Colonel in the Royal Pinks was offered at that "the political effect of Mars joining Saturn in Capricorn, will be £2000, but went without an offer; Majors relaxed a little, but great;" nor should we like to propose a measure on the basis of the Lieutenant-Colonels were not to be done at any price; old Generals as announcement that "the solar opposition to Mars from Gemini and firm as ever. Sagittarius, denotes a blow to more than one nation." On the whole, we think LORD PALMERSTON justified in ignoring the prediction of the "medicine man," who is a greater authority on "physics" than on the science of statesmanship. دو The Exchange from the Militia into the Line is still in favour of the latter; but the consideration, even with the increase of respectability, and real silver at mess, is so ridiculously small, that nothing worthy of the name of business was done. A large sum was offered for a choice regiment, and after many biddings, a sale was nearly effected for an amount scarcely worth mentioning, when unfortunately the negociation was broken off upon its being announced that the purchaser (supposed to be the fashionable MARQUIS OF HOBBIE D'HOY, who comes of age next week) had been suddenly seized with the small-pox. This threw a damper on all other sales. It is to be hoped that this gloom will soon clear away, for really, as a military market, the amount of money that has recently exchanged hands, has been so preposterously insignificant, that it must be completely unworthy the notice of any gentleman, much less an Officer; and if prices do not improve very quickly, it is greatly to be feared that in less than a year, we shall have no market at all. FRIENDLY ADVICE. THE Society of Friends (of Russia) have, to use their own expression, been "giving forth" an 'appeal' on the subject of war wherein, as apologists for the Government, they observe "We are not insensible to the difficulties of their position in this momentous crisis, in having to deal with a powerful enemy, and at the same time to stem the torrent of martial excitement in the public mind." Accepting this as being the true state of the case, we think the "difficulties" of the Government might readily be reduced one half, if they simply were to cease attempting to withstand the current of popular enthusiasm, and devote themselves wholly to dealing with the enemy. This solution of the difficulty might not meet the views of the Society of Friends, but we are pretty sure that it would be approved of in every other society, where those composing it are really the friends of England. 66 OUR contemporary of Printing-House Square, says of itself, that it is a "thing which the British public require as much as they do their bed or their breakfast." We are quite ready to admit that the Times is as good as a breakfast, but we wonder that our contemporary should compare itself to a bed; for it is all over with a newspaper when the public begins to sleep on it. We have not yet discovered any affinity between our blankets and the sheets of the Times. When the latter become so dull as to admit of our sleeping on them, it will be time enough to talk of our contemporary as a bed-but at present the idea is premature. * See ZADKIEL's Astrological Almanack for October, 1843. "DELICATE" CRIMINALS. THAT very interesting individual, MR. CARDEN, who attempted to carry off with force an Irish heiress, and was sentenced to a long imprisonment for his lawless act, is about to be set at liberty on the ground of delicate health-a plea which ought, of course, to prevail in favour of other convicted criminals. We can imagine the applications that will be sent in from all the jails in the kingdom, when it is known that CARDEN is at liberty. JACK SCROGGINS, the burglar, will, no doubt, feel the want of his usual midnight exercise, and JOE LIGHTFINGER will terribly miss his afternoon saunterings in the park, where he was accustomed to carry on his trade as a pickpocket. Nothing will be easier than to obtain a surgeon's certificate, intimating that looking daily more delicate. Every culprit may soon be converted SCROGGINS is losing his accustomed bloom, and that LIGHTFINGER is into an interesting invalid, if indisposition is to be a good plea for the curtailment of punishment. We never yet knew a prison in which the inmates did not look ill, for they are generally a set of the most illlooking fellows. AGGRAVATED ASSAULT ON A FEMALE. WE are sorry to allude to a cruel case of an aggravated assault committed by a gentleman of highly respectable position. He was sitting with his wife in the midst of an apparently amicable conversation, which happened to turn on the taste often shown by young men for entering the army. The lady innocently made the remark that it was perhaps on account of the uniform," when her husband, without the slightest notice was guilty of an atrocity which for a moment deprived her of the power of utterance. "Yes," exclaimed the unfeeling monster, "it is very likely the uniform, or perhaps they may be seized with an epaulettic fit." This cruel outrage on common and every other kind of sense, caused a shock to the wife, from which she was some seconds in recovering. It has been said in extenuation, that the perpetrator did not foresee the mischief he caused, but if so, the result affords a fresh instance of the evil arising from an incautious use of such a dangerous weapon as punning. BAKERS' AND BUTCHERS' WARNING FOR THE 20TH.-Give your orders, ladies and gentlemen, for remember the Fast Day is to-morrow. Flunkey (who does not approve of Bloomsbury). "No, MA'AM, I DON'T OBJEC TO THE 'OUSE, FOR IT'S HAIREY, AND THE VITTLES IS GOOD; BUT THE FACT IS, THAT ALL MY CONNECTIONS LIVE IN BELGRAVIA!" "ANY OLD CLO'" OF NICHOLAS. THE EMPEROR ALEXANDER has rewarded the fidelity of the Russian Guards, by presenting them with a parcel of old uniforms belonging to the late EMPEROR NICHOLAS. We hail this act as to some extent giving promise of amendment on the part of the new CZAR, who shows a disposition to get rid of some at least of the old habits of his father. We cannot say much for the Russian Guards if any enthusiasm is created by the arrival of a bag of second-hand clothes which they are called on to preserve as "a sacred relic and an enduring memorial for future generations." Considering, however, that the late CZAR looked upon the officers of his army as mere flunkies appointed to execute his bidding, it is probable, that like so many valets, they may have expected their late master's wardrobe to be sent to them as their perquisite. It is to be hoped that the living Emperor has, together with the rest of the old clothes, got rid of his father's shoes, for if ALEXANDER is wise, he will not attempt to walk in them. We wonder that the refusal of the relics was not offered to MADAME TUSSAUD, by whom the best price is understood to be given for the left-off wearing apparel of departed royalty. Perhaps the Russian Guards may yet enter into negociations with the energetic mistress of the Baker Street Bazaar, who will, no doubt be glad of the opportunity to place NICHOLAS "in his habit as he lived" among the other deceased Sovereigns, whose executors appear to have turned their old clothes into money, with the utmost promptitude. HEROISM KEPT IN ITS PLACE. A LITTLE Drummer-boy of the 3rd Grenadier Guards has blossomed into a full-blown hero. He was in the thick of the fight at Alma, Balaklava, and Inkermann. He flew about the battle-field a very Puck or Goodfellow, with water for the wounded. "But for his care"-say the accounts-" many of the wounded would never have survived to receive surgical aid." PRINCE ALBERT has heard the story; and the Prince, with the feelings of a soldier-for is not H. R. H. a Field-Marshal-intends to present the boy with-with-with-(well, if it must be said)—with £5! It is thus we cultivate true heroism. In France, for instance, the boy would have been spoiled. He would have been educated, promoted; and in time might have found one of his little drum-sticks converted to a Marshal's baton. We know better. We reward valour in a practical, business-like way; we pay ready money for it; and so have done with it for once and all. Long-Eared Musicians. IN the musical world of Germany there is a sect, of which HERR WAGNER is said to be the leader, that has originated a new species of music, called "the music of the Future." Second sight has ceased in Scotland, but in Germany there are evidently pretenders to second hearing. THE CAREER OPEN TO TALENT. You there, you few there, you small exclusive crew there, Station, the nation, for any situation, Needs not and heeds not; we want the man of skill, Fit for, with wit for, the post he has to fill. Therefore to Talent open the career! New blood for true blood; that is how to view "blood," Why, "blood ?" and "high blood?”—a booby may supply Not that!-we've got that-the thing we want is brains. He who the first in Honour's walk advances, Him we will honour, him will we revere; England, thy plan must be the same as France's: Meet then, compete then, call Wisdom from the street then, Mate them, and rate them, discerning swan from goose. Ever the clever, unswerving in endeavour, Blinking and sinking the blazon and the crest; Scheme, than the line that's recommended here, THE FOOTSTEPS IN THE SNOW. A LONG discussion has been kept up on the subject of certain marks on the snow in Devonshire, which have been pronounced in turn the impression of a cloven foot, the steps of a rat, and the trail of a badger. Science and ignorance have been equally positive in assigning these wonderful footmarks to a bird, a beast, or even a fish, while superstition insists that the hoof was that of a certain old gentleman. Since these marvellous effects have been perceptible in the snow, we have taken it for granted that the same sort of indentations may exist in ordinary mud, and we have carefully investigated the footmarks about our own premises. The first result of our inquiry was to detect the print of a stout highlow down our area steps to our kitchen door; thence to our larder, and thence to our kitchen back again. On comparing the print with the boot of a policeman, whom we once surprised in our cupboard, and who made his escape in his stockings, we came to the conclusion that one of the force must have been the proprietor of the footsteps. In walking the other day in Kensington Gardens we observed for a considerable distance a track of something that seemed to have swept along the mud from one end of the broad walk to the other. At first we thought it must have been a hair broom, then an aquatic bird, then a sledge, then a road-scraper; and it was not until we saw a lady advancing in a splendid silk dress, with which she swept up the mud wherever she went, that we ascertained the source of the mystery. Although we traced the phenomenon to its origin, we confess that we remained still in a state of surprise at the taste which induced welldressed ladies to turn dust collectors, and to convert their silks and satins into machines for performing the office of scavengers. A Bad Precedent. THE vacant space in St. Paul's Churchyard is, it is reported, to be filled up; for otherwise the City Corporation says, it will be making a very bad opening indeed, because if the people are allowed to see so much of the Cathedral, they will naturally be wanting to see more. THE SCHOOL FOR EMBEZZLEMENT. WE have frequently called serious attention to the impolicy, as well as the cruelty of keeping clerks at starvation salaries, and we have argued more than once that when you announce your desire to employ a person at a rate of remuneration on which he cannot live honestly, you might as well advertise for a thief to enter your service. There has been a sad exemplification of the truth of this position at the Sheffield Sessions recently holden. There, among professional thieves and pickpockets, who were adepts in their lawless arts, stood a young man, aged twenty, a solicitor's clerk, who was indicted for embezzling about eighty pounds, the money of his employer. This youth's defence exemplifies all the evils of the system which we have always set our face against. He begins by saying, "I have been clerk to MR. VICKERS since I was 13 years of age, a period of between seven and eight years. It has been part of my duty to collect the town trustees' rents and keep the rental." After a service of so many years in a position of so much trust, it might be expected that the salary would bear some proportion to the responsibility incurred and the services rendered. The prisoner goes on to say "I had a salary of 10s. per week, which was not sufficient to keep me in board, lodging, and washing, and to support the appearance of a respectable clerk; and having no father to look after me, and keep me right, and my mother being poor, and not able to assist me, I thought that I might perhaps be able to pay back the money I had misappropriated." Here is a youth entrusted with the collection of large sums of money, and paid by a pittance which it was almost physically impossible for him to live upon-a fact that should at least have been so fully present to the mind of the employer, that constant vigilance would have been exercised over the accounts of the inadequately paid servant. But notwithstanding that he was giving way to irresistible temptation for a long period, he adds "I was never asked to account for any rents until MR. CLEGG spoke to me about them on the 16th of this month-the day before I gave myself up to the authorities." And a little further on he says, his employer "did not examine the accounts of the town rental," even after the defalcations were discovered. Thus the unfortunate culprit was not only kept at a salary on which he could not live, but he was even deprived of the safeguard of a vigilant exercise of supervision, which might have saved him from crime, or, at all events, would have prevented him from getting further and further into its meshes. The Chairman of the Sessions concluded his sentence in the following words: "I am likewise bound to say, that the Bench feel you were placed under circumstances of extraordinary temptation. It is plain, from the fact of your being entrusted to receive the rents of the town trustees, when you had a salary of only 10s. a week to depend upon, and your being obliged to maintain a certain appearance and position of respectability, that you occupied a position of great temptation. Therefore we take the most lenient view of your case that we can do, and the sentence of the Court is, that you be imprisoned for three months on each of the two charges on which you have pleaded guilty-six months in all. The prisoner was then removed, weeping passionately, as he had been for some time." the criminal population by the system we have exposed so frequently. Here is undoubtedly an instance of an addition having been made to Surely if those should be punished who are the causes of crime, there should be some penalty inflicted on those who grind down their clerks to such a scale of remuneration as to make honesty an almost impracticable quality amid the cruel temptations by which it is surrounded. GENUINE SCOTCH SPIRIT. STATISTICS relative to the quantities of spirits consumed in Glasgow have sometimes, if not many, been presented to the public. Glasgow has thus acquired a name which is nearly tantamount to that of CLICQUOT. There is, however, good reason to believe that Glasgow is "na' fou'; na' that fou';" though there may be occasionally "just a wee drap in her ee;" for it appears that she is not only capable of taking care of herself, but also of caring for the common cause. A correspondent informs us that, as her contribution to the Patriotic Fund, next to the subscription of London, Glasgow has returned the largest sum, namely, about £45,000. This fact proves that Glasgow is under the influence of a spirit which is neither Glenlivat, nor Farintosh, nor Islay; a spirit which does, indeed, dispense toddy, but does not constitute an ingredient of that beverage-the spirit of bounty; and the " wee drap which her "ee may occasionally sparkle with may be regarded as an emanation of generous liquor. THE HEADS OF THE ARMY. A PHRENOLOGIST, who has examined the organisation of the British army, has expressed the opinion that it is remarkable for an excess of "Form" and a deficiency of "Order." |