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THANK you, Joux BALDWIN BUCKSTONE, Lessee of the Theatre To the Worthy Inhabitants of

Royal, Haymarket. Very good; and thank you, heartily.

We have never seen a prettier thing; one that dallies more with BROMPTON.

the innocence of childhood and youth than Little Bo-Peep, the sweet little Arcadian blossom that now comes so mincingly forth to

render her curtsey at the lamps of Christmas. She is the Little BoLADIES AND GENTLEMEN,

Peep, whose story has opened millions of baby eyes with curiosity and We the REGULAR DUSTMEN of this Parish, in the employ of wonder; a Bo-Peep that seems to have been fed on lilies and roses, Messrs. H. & S. BIRD, make humble application to you for a CHRIST- and refreshed with a morning bath of honey-dew. A Bo-Peep, that with MAS BOX, which you are usually so kind as to give;-we bring our

her choice prettiness takes us away, away, up into the heights of fairyTokens, one, a Medal of Fredericus Borussorum Rex; on the reverse, a man land: heights that lie nearer heaven. striking another with a club. The second, a Medal with inscription

And very nicely, very deliberately is the story of Bo-Peep done for " Fredericus Magn. D. G. Rex;" on the reverse, Fama, Prudentia et Vertute.

this same real play-house; real as the money-box of the money-taker; No connexion with Scavengers.

and yet, for the time, made a messuage or tenement of fairy-land

itself. Beautiful Bo-Peep has about her à charming crowd of shepCharles Stagg, and Thomas Tunks.

herds and shepherdesses, bright and innocent as the flowers of Arcady CAUTION.- As there are persons who go about with intent to Defraud

while her sheep have a fullness of form, and a length and delicacy of us, and Impose on you, be so kind as not to give your Bounty to apy Person,

fleece, that would cause them to carry away the prize (whatever it but to those who can produce the aforesaid Token. Please not to return

might be) at any sheep-show in the realms of Apollo. For Bo-Peep herself with her sheep, go and see her, and you will own with MR. WILLIAM WORDSWORTH that she is

" A young lamb's heart amid the full-grown flock." Impressed with the caution conveyed through this Bill, we determined that the “ regular dustman" should not be defrauded by our and wishes when we know that Scruncher, Gnasher, Crasher, Horcler,

And, therefore, do we incontinently guard her with our sympathies heedlessly coming down with the dust in favour of some individual, tainted not only by irregularity, but by a “connexion with the very sharp lupine attornies, with sharpest teeth, made ready for

irregular and others of like melodiously significant names are the men wolves, scavengers." We therefore resolved to see the dustman claiming to the choicest mutton: whilst who can think, without shuddering, of be my regular mine own,” and we anticipated the pleasure of an the dreadful uses to which the parchment of those singularly large interview with one whom we supposed had in some way earned the and snowy-fleeced sheep may be inexorably perverted! right to a medal with such a motto as Fana, Prudentia et Virtute"

Thus does our interest rise and rise for Bo-Peep. Our heart dances attached to it. On the morning of boxing-day we accordingly descended to an inter- is about to divest herself for bed. She dons an aggravating little

with her; our tenderness follows her. She enters her cottage. She view (we don't mean to imply any degradation on our part, beyond night-cap, shaped by Arcadian fairy, from so much moonlight, scaour simply going

down stairs), and we at once asked the hero of a sonably adding thereto a night-jacket of the same pure material. But hundred dustyards to produce his medal. Our demand was willingly little Bo-Peep iscomplied with by a veteran whose cheeks were like ashes, and whom

---not too bright or good ve proceeded to sift by a few searching questions. Puzzled how a

For human nature's daily food." dustman could have become decorè in England, though we have heard of honours having been formerly showered on those whose name is Not she: and, therefore, with a sweet simplicity that touches upon Legion in France, we enquired of the bonest fellow what were the the human sympathies of the beholders, -Bo-Peep, having once or twice services he had performed to entitle him to wear his medal. We anti- melodiously sneezed, conveys to the tip of her musical little nose an cipated the possibility of his having been present at the sacking of some unguent from the domestic taper. This done, Bo-Peep, with no more city, whose ashes

he might perhaps have aided in removing, but the ado, goes fearless in her innocence to bed; and ere the cricket can only reply we could get from the modest veteran as to how be had won

chirp thrice, Bo-Peep is folded to sleep. his medal was simply this, “I bought this ’ere medal for eighteen

As though a rose could shut, and be a bud again." pence of a Jew in Marrowbone Lane."

It is then that Scruncher, the wolf-captain, enters with his wolfWe returned from this interview with a consciousness that a hero is pack; it is then that, after a fierce struggle, Bo-Peep is in peril whenafter all nothing but common dust.

Miss Mary BROWN takes the place of Miss LYDIA THOMPSON, and the Pantomime begins.

But our notice terminates with Bo-Peep. The “Grove of Golden

Laburnums we take to be the painted dream of Little Bo-Peep; and ! CANT IN CRYSTAL.

it is a vision worthy of the little enchantress! The late memorialists, who so pathetically appealed against the

(Holiday reader, go and see her; if married and with children, take iniquities of Greek art as exhibited in the Crystal Palace, have not your wife and the babies : if not married, and consequently childless,

send other men's babies; if you are alone in the world, and, therefore, permitted Christmas to pass without making another practical appeal

a “blighted being," write a letter to the churchwarden, and take a few to the feelings of the Directors in favour the nude condition of the statues at this inclement season of the year.

rows of the gallery for the Parish Children of St. Red Riding Hood.)

We have been favoured (exclusively) with a copy of the letter of the intelligent and courteous Bo-Peep.' Hard labour, making holiday for a night, may be witched

Finally, complete in its beauty is the acted, painted history of Little GROVE, the Crystal Secretary, in final answer to the memorialists.

It with it; and leaning forward on fustian sleeves, the while the shepherds runs as follows:

and shepherdesses, bright and glancing as humming birds, dance before " The Crystal Palace Company, Crystal Palace, Sydenham. him, say—“And I, too, am in Arcadia !” GENTLEMEN, Your letter, with the various articles accom- Again, thank you, Mr. BUCKSTONE. The neighbourhood of the panying it

, has been considered by the Directors at their meeting on Haymarket ought in acknowledgment of your Christmas doings to Wednesday.

present you with a testimonial plum-pudding. The Directors desire me to inform you that, although they have the profoundest sense of the intelligence and humanity that have induced you to send articles of attire for the various statues, at present

LORD JOHN RUSSELL says that there is one bit of truth in the wholly nude, they cannot accept contributions that, especially at the Austrian treaty, and that is at the end, where the name of the reprepresent season, would be far better applied elsewhere.

sentative of England is coupled with the words “Done at Vienna." I am therefore directed to return the sheepskin coat forwarded for the wear of the Arcadian APOLLO; with, at the same time, the petticoat BURGLARIOUS JOCOSITY.-Q. What Bar is that which often opens, of Whitney flannel, and second-hand visite for the VENUS DE MEDICIS. I but never shuts ?-A. A crow-bar.

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THE CZAR of Russia is our common Foe,

A Monster Nuisance to the human race.
This an old and stale remark, I know :

Alas! yes—’tis extremely common-place,
But though that is, unhappily, the case,

Pass it on!
This fact, to you and me that seems so trite,

That its mere mention makes us gape and yawn,
On many a slave's mind, like the newborn light

Of Truth, if whispered in his ear, would dawn,
To exterminate a Pest our swords are drawn.

Pass it on!
A common Murderer for his crime we hang;

A savage maniac, dealing death, cut down:
The Czak is but the master of a gang

Of many bravoes : let them fear his frown:
To you what is it that he wears a Crown?

Pass it on!
Ah! why should brave men cut their brothers’ throats

To glorify this Fiend in human shape,
Who on their mutual carnage safely gloats ?

Who, whilst they perish, safe from scratch or scrape,
Grins at their misery, like a giant ape.

Pass it on!
O fools to break each other's bones! O blind!

O dolts to blow out one another's brains !
What wretched simpletons are we, mankind,

That our best blood Earth's reeking bosom stains
Because one cruel Tyrant lives and

reigns !

Pass it on!
Yes, pass it on; this to your neighbour pass :

One bad man's will maintains this wicked war,
And that one is the devilish NICHOLAS.

A word from mouth to mouth will travel far.
Down, by the shortest method, with the Czar!

Pass it on!



"The Lady of the Woods." (YOUNG LADY FROM THE COUNTRY COMES TO CHRISTMAS WITH HER COLERIDGE calls—“The birch the lady of the woods." FRIENDS IN TOWN.)

We learn from The Englishwoman in Russia (let all English

men and all English women consult its teeming pages) POLITE RAILWAY OFFICIAL. Now then / Claim yer Luggage, 'ere !

that, under the gallant sway of NICHOLAS, COLERIDGE's YOUNG LADY, WHO IS PROVIDED AGAINST ALL EMERGENCIES. Three Boxes, a Carpel-“ladies of the woods” and ladies of the Court of St. PetersBag, some Game, Packet of Music Books, and a Bough of Mistletoe. And please to be burg are, at times, very unceremoniously made known to very careful with the Mis:letoe.

one another.

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of his pledge to effect an indiscriminate overthrow of "all the different

systems of philosophy which have hitherto occupied the public attenWe were lately rather amused by receiving a notice dated from the Slasher among the intellectual giants of every age, weight, and size.

tion.” It must have been a treat to have witnessed the philosophic Royal Marionnette Theatre, and headed

though we cannot conceive how he could have polished the whole of PHILOSOPHY!

them off almost at one brush in four evenings. We should have

thought that an hour at least would have been required for his "little We can understand a good deal of Philosophy being required by a affair” with Locke, while his onslaught on Socrates might have manager, even of Marionuettes, and we therefore perused with some occupied a whole night as a “Set-to with the Big’un." curiosity the note which follows :

When we remember how many philosophers” there are in the “SIR, --M. Corteux has the honour to announce that he intends giving Four world just now, we wonder the Slasher does not get up a “Benefit” in PHILOSOPHY, of which he is the Author, and which overthrows all the different Systems gloves with some of the numerous “chickens," " pets,” and “ snobs," PUBLIC LECTURES, to which the admission will be gratuitous, upon a New SYSTEM or Leicester Square, and exhibit his " noble art” by putting on the which have hitherto been brought

before the Public attention. These Lectures win who represent the various schools of native and foreign philosophy. be delivered in French, and be translated during their Progress into English.”

We have not the pleasure of the acquaintance of M. COYTEUX, but we can perceive in him some of the elements of true Philosophy, for by making his Lectures gratuitous, he shows that he either despises

Epitaph upon a Prize Pig, died from over-feeding,

Christmas, 1854. lucre, or sets his Philosophy down at its true value, or acts on the conviction that Philosophy is an article without a price in the market.

HERE rests his head upon a lump of earth Various Philosophers have had various titles, such as the Peripatetic,

A pig to cattle-shows and prize-lists known : the Epicurean, and a hundred others; but as M. Corteux undertakes

The candle-maker only knew his worth, to overthrow all other schools, and smash every blessed Sage that

And apoplexy marked him for her own.
ever ventured to open his mouth, we have given to the Marionnette
Philosopher the title of “the Slasher."
We regret we were not able to be present at any one of the four

Change for Spanish.
turns-up between the Adelaide Gallery Pet and the Plato who might be It is said that we are to have a Spanish legion as a reinforcement
termed on this occasion the Athenian Snob, or Paley, whom we may be for the Crimea. We propose that if such be the case, their pay should
justified in alluding to as the Cambridge Chicken. We should like to be made over to British holders of Spanish bonds. They having bled
have been present to have seen SOCRATES, LOCKE, HOBBES, and a few in the cause of Spain, it is only fair that they should have the price of
others set up as skittles for CortEUX to bowl them all down, in fulfilment Spanish blood in return.

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a sight, and the Editor of Bell's Life, in an agony of shame, prints SLAVES OF THE RING.

indignant denunciation of these two cowardly girls,” describes MR. Noon as

a white-feathered cock, and little more than a muff," and EOPLE have indulged in un- adds, as for BARRY, Heaven forgive the mother that bore him."

warrantable and untimely Amends, however, were made to the gluttons of manly sport on the
fears, lest civilisation, edu- following Tuesday, when Mr. CHARLES BROOKS, in a battle of fifty
cation, and other refining rounds, gloriously defeated Mr. THOMAS TYLER, and though BROOKS
agencies might interfere had lost the use of his sinister optic, the game fellow still kept coming
with the preservation of gaily up, and always forced the fighting, finishing his man off with a
that taste for manly sports, splendid hit in the ribs, which was the coup de grace. BROOKS is
which is so essential to evidently an artist of no ordinary merit.
the maintenance of our We think we have said enough to re-assure all who trembled for the
character as Britons. At fate of one of our noblest recreations that there is no fear that civili-
the opening of a new year, sation and humanity have as yet done too much,

or that while our
it may be pleasant to know humbler classes are permitted to witness such spectacles, and are taught
that any such distressing by their immediate superiors, by tavern landlords, and sporting news-
anticipations are unneces- papers, to regard such scenes as displays of manliness and courage, the
sary, and that all our women of England will be less beaten, battered, kicked, and trampled
manly, sports, from racing on than at present. The man who, from a place of safety, delights to
to ratkilling, appear, from witness brutality, is just the man to practise it when the helplessness
the recognised organs of of his victim offers him similar advantages.
their patrons, to be pur-
sued with vigour.

Pugilism we may espe-
cially refer to as being in

a very healthy condition,
Several fights took place

“My dear Mr. Punch, just before the great Christian Festival, and six or seven are “fix- signed ' A SINGLE Man. Not that I approve of any man being single :

"I was so delighted to see a letter in the Times the other day tures” for the present month.

We have had great pleasure in perusing the details of two.of these quite the reverse.. I think them odious selfish wretches, and what contests. One of them, between gentlemen of the names of BARRY pleased me was this oco complaining that he could get no wine or grog and Noon

respectively, was an event "looked forward to by the to drink after dinner on Christmas Day, because they turned him out of Sporting World with unusual interest and curiosity." MR. BARRY his inn that he went to the moment it was half-past two o'clock. And was comparatively untried, but MR. NOON (whose conversational another, by the name of Second FLOOR,' in the next day's paper, also powers are stated to be very brilliant-he

is described as that chaffing wanted

his dinner, and was very near not getting any at all. I am glad

complained that he could find no place open for a long time when he gentleman,") has fought eight battles, and has never had a black eye. The fight in question took place on Tuesday, the 19th of December: they were annoyed and put to inconvenience, both of them : the mean The preliminaries were performed in London. MR. BARRY, on stripping not having the money-they ought to get it: and then there are

men. It served them right for not marrying. Don't tell me of their to be weighed, "looked in magnificent condition, but as his wont, was hundreds

of thousands of young men in the same shameful position of very reserved.” His“ broad, square shoulders and chest

, gradually celibacy for the same reason, which really is not want of means, but tapering out to his waist, were covered with knots of hard muscle those nasty taverns they go to and drink their stout beer and regale which stood out in bold relief. His well turned symmetrical legs were not less indicative of his capabilities."

upon their mutton-chops and beef-steaks. Now at least there is one day So much for the reserved gentleman. The chaffing gentleman had in the week, and one or two more in the year, when they are shùt, just i also his peculiar merits. He had been obliged to have recourse to MAN and "SECOND FLOOR' were wandering about Town in the wet,

at dinner time, out of their coffee and chop houses. When SINGLE severe measures to bring himself down to weight (nine stone two, hungry

and miserable, I hope they reflected that if Single Man" bad if any lady reader would like the information), and every rib was visible. He had trained at Rottingdean, and we are given to under- been married, and Second Floor had taken a Mrs. Floor to himself, stand had to take an immense deal of work, and put the muzzle on for they might then have been sitting, after their pudding and beef, sipping the last day or two. For this privation however he fully compensated Sunday as far as the Sunday Bill, to keep all those

young lawyers,

and were his attacks upon a leg of mutton which had been provided for his medical students, and scribbling authors and writers

and reporters, your dinner, that it required the aid of a Stanhope lens to discover the meat Coal Holes and Dust Bins and Dicks and Joes, and Rainbows and

Garrets as well as Second Floors, without refreshment, by stopping their he left upon the bone. Whether this statement as to his voracity Cheshire Cheeses. That would teach them to value the comforts of be true we cannot say." To avoid mistake, or suspicion of joke; home: but there is one thing more that Parliament ought to do. Now Mr. Punch, begs to state, distinctly, from the allusions to a "ferocity,” and “voracity," that the journal whence he takes his infor- they have closed the taverns so many hours on Sunday (just at dinnermation is not speaking of a beast but of a man. He is “ an aggravating time) they ought certainly to close the clubs too, so as to give the customer, but generally liked for his excessive generosity when young men of the aristocracy a taste of single blessedness on the possessed of the means.”

Sabbath, which, that they may fully enjoy it, is the fervent wish of We shall not linger over the fight, our object being less to supply a

Jan. 1855.

A MOTHER.detailed account of it, than to comfort and re-assure those who deemed "P.S. It is not because I have five grown up daughters at home that that true British sports were on the decline. But it may be interest. I write the above; but from sympathy with others.” ing to say that both champions came up to their work in style, and toed the scratch” at a quarter past two. After some very pretty dodging (we condense the report, but preserve the phraseology) Mr.

A School for Actors. Noon crept close, dashed out his left on the mouth of MR. BARRY, but the latter cross countered beautifully with bis right on the side of By the statutes of the founder of Westminster School, QUEEN MR. Noon's wig-block. Later, MR. Noon removed the bark from the ELIZABETH, it was, we are informed, decreed that an English play as side of MR. BARRY's snout with his nails-an accident which led to well as a Latin one should be annually performed, for the improvement unpleasant remarks. The ruby (blood) became perceptible. MR.' of the scholars as to their pronunciation and manner of speakingIf Noon caught MR. BARRY on the snorter, and received a nose-ender in this idea had been acted properly out, considerable advantage might have return. MR. BARRY effected some heavy deliveries in Mr. Noon's accrued therefrom to the British Drama, which would not perhaps ribs, and cross-countered him on the side of his nut. MR. BARRY let have been so frequently murdered by performers whose pronunciation is go his left on the potato-trap; and Mr. Noon got on MR. BARRY's incorrect, and whose manner of speech is ridiculous. damaged speaking-trumpet, but was countered on the right peeper.' Regular ding-dong fighting. After which Mr. B. got to MR. N.'s larboard goggle. Mutual fiddling followed, and ultimately the cha ling

Between Bull, Crapaud, and the Post. gentleman, finding his match in the reserved gentleman, declined further 1. We are beginning to reap the.reward of the close alliance between fighting for the time. The contest was renewed on the following the people of France and ourselves. We are to write to one another Saturday, but we regret to say that the proceedings were, this time, at the cost of eight sous instead of twenty, What a happy man is less satisfactory. Both of the British champions, whose noble courage ROWLAND HILL! In due season and throughout the civilised world, and glorious hardihood it was fondly hoped would set a brilliant his genius will assert itself in cheap postage. France and England example, made“ a disgraceful exhibition of cowardice.” After a blow as a beginning exchange fourpenny letters : may they never again or two, they kept aloof, and neither reproaches, threats, nor promises exchange forty-two pounders ! May the paper exchanged by them could make them approach. One of the seconds cried at so humiliating always be post, and never, never cartridge !

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I am a man who dwell alone,

Save only that I keep a dog,
Who eats my scraps up, orts and bone,

So that the creature shares my prog.
I had a boiled salt round of beef

On Monday, all to my own cheek,
Whereon my hunger sought relief

From day to day, for near a week,
Of cold boiled beef the daily round,

After a while begins to tire,
One longs for something nicely browned,

Or steaming from the genial fire.
And then the beef was getting dry;

But food away I never fling,
What can be done with it? thought I:

Bubble and Squeak, Sir!—that's the thing.
KING GEORGE THE FOURTH was not a dunce

At least in gastronomic lore:

Bubble and Squeak he tasted once ;
Young Lady (reading Crimean Correspondence). "I MUST TELL YOU, too, that I HAVE

And then he ate it evermore.
Elder Lady (interrupting hastily). "THERE—THERE—MY DEAR, GO ON TO

The King had oft on Turtle dined,

We both, to think I am inclined,

The less enjoyed it of the two.
F. S. A.

So large with what it fed on grew

My whetted appetite's increase, We take the following extraordinary statement from the Atheneum :- :-a statement that, we That 'twas as much as I could do venture to say, combines within itself a greater evidence of destitution with a more dreadful To leave my dog a little piece. hopelessness of imposture than any in scientific or literary annals yet recorded.

And even when I gave him that, " The Council of the Society of Antiquaries having been apprised that several persons are in the habit of using the

I muttered in a doubtful mood, initials of Fellowship with that Society without the necessary qualification of being Fellows, have come to the determination to take some steps to check, if possible, the practice for the futute ;-pending, however, any stringent

Is this quite right now-what I'm at, measures on the subject, the Council have at once resolved publicly to advertise the names of all offending parties In giving you, Sir, Christian food ? that may be forwarded to them."

The dish at which I've pegged away, We trust that the Council of the Society of Antiquaries will not be too hard upon offenders who assume the initials of Fellowship without any right so to do, in merciful consideration of

So that it my interior fills, the modesty of those individuals who, from their discoveries, are in every way justified in

Would that they had it this cold day,

The Brave on the Crimea's hills ! appending to their names the golden letters F. S. A.; but who nevertheless bashfully refuse to do so.

They in the cannon's mouth do not ALBERT Smith for instance, who in a former lecture discovered that “straps belonged to

The Bubble reputation seek, the dark ages of dress trowsers ” has never yet taken up his fellowship though invited to submit to the dignity.

But Glory find; their onset hot,

Leaves to the Russians all the Squeak. MARY WEDLAKE who has for nearly a hundred years, with all the sweet pertinacity of woman, asked of dumb generations—-"Do you Bruise your Oats yet ? ” has hitherto

But Bubble, not of empty air, rejected the initials.

And Squeak that's more than idle sound, MR. CHARLES KEAN as the importer of the oldest translations from the East End remains

Soon may those gallant heroes share undecorated. He has moreover played the Corsican Brothers until one brother is totally

At mess on Russia's conquered ground! bald, and the other brother grey-headed, and yet we never heard that he had availed himself of the smallest admiration (for which he is ever grateful) conveyed in the antiquarian letters.

The Niam-Niams, or tailed men, exhibited by DOCTOR KAunt are—we hear—about to The Rose and the Mistletoe. assume the initials; which must be thought the more selfishly preposterous, seeing that they have already appendages of their own.

A REMARKABLY intelligent young botanist of A distinguished cheesemonger, elected on the strength of his oldest and bluest Stilton, our acquaintance asserts it as his firm convietion, has, we hear, received an intimation from the Council, that his election is not valid : not strengthened by his public observation, not the from any wanted age in the cheese, as was; anticipated; but from the fact that, one of the less than by his private experience, that plants fifty sovereigns paid by him for F. S. A., bas been found a bad one,-a fact that, with all the have a decided influence upon the actions of audacity of a shopkeeper, he has ventured to deny. The man declares that the sovereign mankind in general, and of womankind, perhaps, was good when liê paid it; however it may have suffered since from disreputable company. in particular. In illustration of this axiom, he He nevertheless continues to mark his cheeses with the initials of the Society, F. S. A., adduces with some shrewdness the indisputable -which he contemptuously renders—" Fine Aged Stilton."

fact, that many a delicate young lady who would Since writing the above we have heard that the Council are in possession of the names of shrink, with maiden modesty, from being kissed twenty miserable offenders, all of whom have, without authority, used the F. S. A. They under the mistletoe, has yet not the slightest will be proceeded against with all the rigour of the law. The historical gridirons of Smith. objection to that ceremony if it be performed field will be red again. E

under the rose.

Prin' ed by William Bradbury, of No. 13, Upper Woburn Place, in the Parish of St. Pancras, and Frederick Mullett Evans, of No. 27, Victoria Street, in the Parish of St. Margaret and St. John, Westminster, both

in the County of Middlesex, Printers, at their Office in' Lombard Street, in the Precinct of Whitefriars, in the City of London, and Published by them at No. 85, Fleet Street in the Parish of St. Bride, tu the City of London.-SATURDAY, January 6, 185.

Q. Who caused the Irish Potatoe Crop to fail ?
URQUHART'S VIEWS OF PALMERSTON. 4. LORD PALMERSTON, availing himself of his opportunities as an

Irish landowner.
MR. URQUHART, we observe, has been Q. Who encourages all the Italian Orgap-men ?

getting up a sort of examination of X. LORD PALMERSTON, from his friendship for Mazzini and the
himself in the country. A set of


gentlemen, who undertake to “watch the Q. Who poisons the Bon-bons for Christmas parties ? war," have summoned Mr. URQUHART 4. LORD PALMERSTON, from his hatred for the religion to which the before them, and, of course without festival belongs ? the slightest hint from himself as to Q: Who refused MR. URQUHART a place, on the ground that he the nature of the questions he would would be neither mentally nor ornamentally an acquisition to Her wish proposed, have put him through MAJESTY ?a catechism in which as many of his

A. LORD PALMERSTON-no-I don't mean that. He did no such crotchets as he can embody in a few thing. Turn the Reporters out.

[Catechism ends.
hours of garrulity, are set forth for the
instruction of the world. The special
business of MR. URQUHART seems
to be to avenge himself upon LORD

PALMERSTON for some dreadful injury
(of the precise nature of which we are

It is proposed that the City Coal Tax should be prolonged for one uninformed, but we believe it has more year, to enable the Corporation to purchase the vacant piece of something to do with the non-appoint- the injury that the London Smoke has been for years doing to our great ment of Mr. URQUHART Cathedral

, it is only proper retribution that it should be called upon to the offices of Governor General of India, As our London Coals have been doing their utmost to throw into

for one short twelvemonth to contribute a little to its embellishment. and Consul-General for obscurity our Cathedral from the moment it was built, they cannot now the Mediterranean) by

complain if they are taxed for a brief period to render comparatively imputing to the Vis open and clear, that which they have been endeavouring, so effectually, count all the crimes of to conceal and blacken. It will only be so much “ Conscience-money the last century:


from the chimney-pots of London. St. Paul's has been terribly put really shudder to con

upon” by the London coals, and it is now high time that something template the guilt of should be put upon the London coals for clearing the character of sť. LORD PALMERSTON, as

Paul's. Let the soot they have heaped upon it be in some measure brought out in


wiped away by their yielding the concession demanded; it is only just URQUHART Confessions.

that this return (a grate-ful return, too, since it will spring from every metropolitan

hearth) should be made to a poor monument that has been He says that “any per: blown upon for upwards of 150 years by every factory-chimney in the son who has proofs of the Viscount's guilt pos

neighbourhood. And thus will St. Paul's rise, for the second time, like sesses impunity for him

a monumental Phoenix, from the ashes of London.
self, and may have office,
of any kind, if he choose
to accept it." We are
rather inclined to be-

lieve this, though we cannot quite understand how, if MR. URQUHART's statement be true, he remains in his present insignificant, not to say contemptible position. However, that is a matter of small consequence-our own object is to expose the hideous turpitude of LORD PALMERSTON by explaining the spirit of the URQUHART Revelations.

Q. You are familiar with the history of the Viscount PALMERSTON ?
A. I am.

Q. Will you do the Committee the favour of explaining the policy of that statesman, and of pointing out its evils ?

4. Don't use such feeble language, you stupid fellow. Ask precise questions.

Q. Is LORD PALMERSTON a statesman ?. 4. No, he is an utter donkey. Q. Is he a patriot ? A. No, he hates England, and has sold it to Russia. Q. Is he a man? A. No, he is an old woman. 4. Is he an amiable, philanthropic persopage ? 4. No, he is a vengeful, malignant, merciless oppressor. 2. Does he understand Foreign Affairs ? 3. Not in the least. I do not think that he knows the White Sea from the Black Sea.

Q. Can he speak French ?

4. Not a word. The commonest despatch has to be translated for him by a clerk.

2. Has he the ear of the House of Commons ?
4. Not in the least. When he rises men either leave the House-
address themselves to private conversation, or go to sleep. Whereas,
when I used to rise-but never mind that. Go on to the next question.

Q. Who burned the Houses of Parliament ?
& Who destroyed the Mark and Williams families in Ratcliffe

Highway ?

Q. Who sunk the Royal George?

Interesting Domestic Discovery. 2. Who causes all the Railway Ad ents ?

It was NAPOLEON, or MADAME DE STAEL, who said that "ir


scratched a Russian, you would find a Tartar underneath.". JONES (of Q. Who told the Russians to surprise us at Inkermann ?

Marylebone) goes further than this, for he says " that he has only got A. LORD PALMERSTON.

to scratch his wife, and he catches a Tartar instantly."

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