Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters MostThe 10th-anniversary edition of the New York Times business bestseller-now updated with "Answers to Ten Questions People Ask" We attempt or avoid difficult conversations every day-whether dealing with an underperforming employee, disagreeing with a spouse, or negotiating with a client. From the Harvard Negotiation Project, the organization that brought you Getting to Yes, Difficult Conversations provides a step-by-step approach to having those tough conversations with less stress and more success. you'll learn how to: · Decipher the underlying structure of every difficult conversation · Start a conversation without defensiveness · Listen for the meaning of what is not said · Stay balanced in the face of attacks and accusations · Move from emotion to productive problem solving |
Contents
Sort Out the Three Conversations | 3 |
The Identity Conversation | 8 |
Explore Each Others Stories | 25 |
Disentangle Intent from Impact | 44 |
Map the Contribution System | 58 |
Have Your Feelings Or They Will Have You | 85 |
Ask Yourself Whats at Stake | 111 |
Create a Learning Conversation | 129 |
Ten Questions People Ask About Difficult Conversations | 235 |
It sounds like youre saying everything is relative Arent some things just true and cant someone simply be wrong? 2 What if the other person really d... | 237 |
A Road Map to Difficult Conversations | 297 |
111 | 304 |
131 | 305 |
147 | 306 |
163 | 307 |
| 308 | |
Whats Your Purpose? When to Raise It and When to Let | 131 |
Begin from the Third Story | 147 |
Listen from the Inside | 163 |
Speak for Yourself with Clarity and Power | 185 |
Take the Lead | 201 |
Putting It All Together | 217 |
201 | 309 |
258 | 310 |
273 | 311 |
Notes on Some Relevant Organizations | 313 |
Other editions - View all
Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss what Matters Most Douglas Stone,Bruce Patton,Sheila Heen No preview available - 2000 |
Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss what Matters Most Douglas Stone,Bruce Patton,Sheila Heen No preview available - 1999 |
Common terms and phrases
able acknowledge actually affect agree answer arguing assume assumptions avoid aware become begin behavior believe better blame boss cause clear colleagues communication complex Consider contribution course deal decide decision defensive difficult conversations discuss don't easy emotional example experience explain Explore express fact fear feelings felt frustrated getting give going happened hard hear hurt identity imagine impact important intentions issue it's Jack judgment keep kind less listening look Lori manage matter mean Michael mistake mother move Negotiation never offer ourselves perhaps person problem question raise reaction reason relationship response result rule seems sense share simply situation someone sometimes spend Stance step story sure talk tell there's things Third thought Three tions true truth trying turn understand upset what's wonder wrong you're