The Will to Change: Men, Masculinity, and LoveFrom the New York Times bestselling author of All About Love, a brave and astonishing work that challenges patriarchal culture and encourages men to reclaim the best part of themselves. Everyone needs to love and be loved—even men. But to know love, men must be able to look at the ways that patriarchal culture keeps them from knowing themselves, from being in touch with their feelings, from loving. In The Will to Change, bell hooks gets to the heart of the matter and shows men how to express the emotions that are a fundamental part of who they are—whatever their age, marital status, ethnicity, or sexual orientation. But toxic masculinity punishes those fundamental emotions, and it’s so deeply ingrained in our society that it’s hard for men to not comply—but hooks wants to help change that. With trademark candor and fierce intelligence, hooks addresses the most common concerns of men, such as fear of intimacy and loss of their patriarchal place in society, in new and challenging ways. She believes men can find the way to spiritual unity by getting back in touch with the emotionally open part of themselves—and lay claim to the rich and rewarding inner lives that have historically been the exclusive province of women. |
Contents
1 | |
2 Understanding Patriarchy | 17 |
3 Being a Boy | 35 |
4 Stopping Male Violence | 55 |
5 Male Sexual Being | 75 |
Whats Love Got to Do with It? | 91 |
7 Feminist Manhood | 107 |
Media Masculinity | 125 |
9 Healing Male Spirit | 135 |
10 Reclaiming Male Integrity | 153 |
11 Loving Men | 169 |
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Common terms and phrases
accepted acts adult affirm anger antifeminist Antwone Fisher archy Barbara Deming become behavior believe boyhood boys learn chal choose create crisis critique culinity dominator model emotional abuse emotional awareness emotional connection emotionally end patriarchy express feelings father fear female femi feminism feminist masculinity feminist movement feminist thinkers feminist women Gary Zukav gender roles girls Harry Potter heal heart Hillside Strangler Incredible Hulk individual integrity intimacy intimate lence lives male domination male pain male violence manhood mass media maternal sadism mothers never nist notion obsession with sex offer one’s parents partner patri patriar patriarchal culture patriarchal masculinity patriarchal thinking rage relationships response Scott Peck seeking self-esteem selfhood sexist sexual share simply social sons soul speak suffering Susan Faludi talk taught teach teenage tell Terrence Real tion tional truth visionary woman word patriarchy wounded writing Zukav
Popular passages
Page ix - Paula from her own responsibilities, participated in the "grand trio," the rescue-victim-persecutor triangle. CHANGING DYSFUNCTIONAL PATTERNS OF LIVING Lemer (1989) states that you can count on only two things that will never change. What will never change is the will to change and the fear of change. It is the will to change that motivates us to seek help. It is the fear of change that motivates us to resist the very help we seek.
Page iv - Ain't I a Woman: Black Women and Feminism Feminist Theory: From Margin to Center Talking Back: Thinking Feminist, Thinking Black Yearning: Race, Gender, and Cultural Politics...